


Looking for a light to call home

by ClexaCanary



Category: The 100 (TV), The 100 Series - Kass Morgan
Genre: Abuse, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety, Anya & Lexa (The 100) Are Siblings, Clexa, Doctor Abby Griffin, Drama, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, F/M, Family Drama, Fluff and Angst, Foster Care, Foster Kid Lexa (The 100), Girl Penis Lexa, Hospitals, Hurt/Comfort, Injury, Intersex, Intersex Lexa (The 100), M/M, Minor Character Death, Panic Attacks, Psychological Drama, Psychological Trauma, Slow Burn, Slow Burn Clarke Griffin/Lexa, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-17
Updated: 2018-07-25
Packaged: 2018-12-16 13:14:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 33
Words: 69,804
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11829465
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ClexaCanary/pseuds/ClexaCanary
Summary: Lexa is born as Alexander, but Alexander died when he was 6. Two years later, Anya meets Lexa, who claims to be her sister. They open up to each other and become sisters again but they aren't safe in their current foster home.





	1. Alexander Woods

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Introductions. In this chapter, Lexa is Alexander.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is corrected thanks to my beta reader [soph_kom_trikru](http://archiveofourown.org/users/soph_kom_trikru)  
> Thank you so much for helping me.
> 
> I think you all know this, but just to sure, the bedtime story is not mine. It's the story from the trailer of The 100 - season 5, where Maddi tells this story to Clarke.
> 
> I don't know if I'm obligated to mention this but just to be sure. The title of the story is not mine, it's a sentence from the song 'A light to call home' by Julia Brennan.

Alexander was born in a happy family. He was the son of Nia and Theo Woods, who owned a big company, called Azgeda. He had a sister, Anya, who was 6 years older than him. He could walk and talk at a young age and his parents couldn’t be more proud. They loved to show off their kids. Anya was top of her class and Alexander was the perfect baby. Everyone knew who the Woods family was. For the outside, they were the perfect happy family. But perfection doesn’t exist.

Little Alexander always played nice with his sister, he liked playing soccer and he liked watching boy programs on the tv, nothing out of the ordinary. Except for the fact that little Alexander sometimes started to scream out of nowhere. When anyone touched him, he started throwing things. Only his sister knew what was wrong and she was the only one who could calm him down. 

Nia and Theo were far from the best parents everyone thought they were. While they never abused their children physically, they had their ways of punishing their kids. They never showed them love, only fake love when other people were around. Their little boy had told them 'I love you’ lots of times, but they only said it back when they were in public. They screamed a lot at their children and when their children did something bad, they ignored them for days, not giving them food, not talking to them. Luckily Anya was there for Alexander.

When Alexander was 5, he enrolled in school. He was really smart and liked learning new things. But the screaming got worse. His teacher didn't know what to do so she send him to the school’s doctor and psychologist. She found out almost immediately what was wrong. She advised Nia and Theo to go to a doctor who could search for abnormalities in his DNA.

A few days later, Alexander, Nia and Theo sat in the waiting room, waiting for Dr. Robbins. She took them to a private room and introduced herself. “You can call me Arizona” she said. “The school's doctor told me what was wrong and we both came to the same conclusion. I’d like to do a DNA test, after I get the results back, you will know if my suspicions were right.”

Nia and Theo gave permission for Alexander to be tested and waited for the results. After an hour, Arizona came back. “I'm afraid my suspicions were right, your child is born intersex”, she explained. “He may have male genitals but he also has two X chromosomes. If you look at Alexander’s bone structure and grow pattern, it’s pretty obvious.”

Nia and Theo had no idea what they expected, but it was certainly not this. They had a child in their family who was abnormal and all they could think about was how this would affect their reputation.

“We want to know our options”, Theo demanded. “Well, changes at this age are possible but not highly recommended. Your child can get surgery to become a girl or can get hormone therapy to become a boy. Both have an high impact on your child and can cause mental problems”, explained Arizona. “I’ll give you time to think about it, I’ll be back in 30 minutes to discuss this further.” With that, the doctor left the room.

30 minutes later, Arizona came back to the room. “Have you been able to think about it for a bit?” She asked them. “We're taking our son home”, Nia stated. “That’s okay, I would like to refer you to a child psychologist. I want to make sure Alexander will be able to deal with it.” Theo stepped between his wife and the doctor. "We don’t need you to tell us what to do, and we don’t need you to tell us how to raise OUR son”, he told her. “Mr. Woods, it was just a suggestion, we all want what’s best for your son. I respect your wishes, is there anything I can do for you?” Arizona knew this was not good for the boy, but right now, she couldn’t do anything. “No thank you”! With that, the Woods family left.

When Arizona talked to her boss about the incident, she was told the same. She couldn’t do anything, unless the parents were declared incapable of taking care of their child, which wasn’t the case, or they had to ask for help. Disappointed, Arizona went back to her other patients, but the little boy wouldn’t leave her mind.

At home, Anya was waiting for them with her aunt. Nia sent Alexander to his room and the rest of the family sat down on the couch.

“Today we went to see the doctor, Theo started, who told us after several tests that our son is supposed to be a girl.” A few minutes, nobody said anything, then Anya started speaking. “But that doesn't really matter, right? Alex is still your child. He is still my sibling.”

“I'm going to make this very simple, Anya. Your brother wants attention and this is how he asks for it. We know we are partly to blame for that but we will do anything in our power to maintain and protect our family,” Nia told her daughter.

Without a word, Anya left the room and walked upstairs to her brother. She didn't understand what her parents’ problem was, Alex is family, boy or girl, and you don't let your family down.

When she reached Alexander's bedroom, she found him sitting in the corner with his teddybear. He was silently crying and he looked scared. When he saw Anya, he cropped against her, relieved that his sister was there for him.

“Anya, why are mommy and daddy mad at me?” He asked her. “I don't know buddy, but I love you, I won't let you down,” Anya replied.

“I want to ask you something and you have to be honest with me, Okay?” Anya asked Alexander. “Okay sis.” “Do you want to be a boy or a girl?” She asked him. Alexander thought for a while, then he answered: “I don't know, I'm supposed to be a boy, right?” “You're not supposed to be anything, you can be whoever and whatever you want to be,” Anya told him.

They both went silent. After a few moments, it was Alexander who broke the silence. “I think I want to be a girl,” he said. “Is that okay?” “Of course it is okay,” Anya reassured him. They hugged and remained in Alexander's room until dinner.

Theo called them down for dinner. When they entered the kitchen, they could feel the tension between the adults. They sat down on their seats and waited. Their parents and aunt joined them and they all got a plate with food. Everyone ate in silence, no one knew what to say.

Halfway through dinner, it was Nia who broke the silence. “Today’s events won’t change anything, tomorrow both of you will go back to school and that’s it. Alexander, we will provide the help you need, we will make sure you can be our son again.” Anya and Alexander didn’t know what their mother meant with the last part, but they knew not to go in discussion so they nodded and continued eating in silence.

After dinner, Anya and Alexander brought the plates to the kitchen and cleaned everything up. “Do you want to go to the soccer field to practise a bit?” Anya asked her brother. “Yes!” Alex replied enthusiastically, running to the hall to put on his shoes.

Nia and Theo never cared about their whereabouts, as long as they were home before dark. They assumed that Anya would look after her brother.

“I want to be the keeper”, Alexander screamed over the field. He stood between the goal posts and Anya tried to make a goal. When she scored, she got to be the keeper. After an hour, Anya decided it was time to go home. “Sorry buddy, but we have school tomorrow”, she told Alexander.

“Anya, will you read me a bedtime story?” Alexander asked. He used his best puppy eyes and hoped it would work. “Of course, buddy. Which one?” She replied. “I want the one about the castle in the sky.” He said excitedly. “Okay, here we go”.

_ Once upon a time, there was a castle in the sky. The people who lived there were scared of the ground below. But the castle was dying, so they decided to send the bad children down to the scary place, to see if they could survive. In the beginning there were a hundred of them. _

“A hundred and one, Bellamy was there too.” Alexander corrected her. 

_ In the beginning, there were a hundred and one of them. They were alone, with no parents, so they did whatever the hell they wanted. But then, the monsters came. Some of them killed the children, some took the children away to steal their bones. One even stole their minds. But the bad children fought back. They realised that, together, even bad children could do good things. They even began to see, that some of the monsters were just like them. But when the parents came down to find their children, they did not understand this. They just made things worse. The 100 fought for their land, they fought for their friends. Sometimes, they fought against their own families. They tried to be the good guys, but then they realised, there are no good guys. And that they weren’t children anymore. But it didn’t matter. After all they did to survive, it turned out that the scary place was haunted by a monster that they could not kill. So they ran and they found a place that could save them, but they couldn’t figure out how to share it. Until a hero rose from the ashes to unite them all. “We are one clan, and we will survive Praimfaya!” The hero said. _

_ In the end, when the unkillable monster finally came, not everyone made it inside. Eight warriors were forced to face the monster alone. They fought like they never had fought before, but it wasn’t enough. Until one of eight, the greatest and fiercest of them all, climbed the highest tower, sending her friends back to the sky, just as the monster roared in. If she had to die to save them, then she would die. But she didn’t, because she had magic blood. Only now, she was alone. Everyone she loved or cared about was gone. Trapped under the ground, or lost in the sky. She thought she was the last person on the world, but she was wrong. She found another, the most badass, correction, second most badass warrior on earth. And they lived happily ever after.  _

Alexander smiled, he loved the story, even though Anya had already told it to him a hundred times. “Time to sleep, buddy,” Anya said. She gave her brother a kiss, laid the blanket over him and left the room. 

“Good night, Alex.”

“Goodnight, Anya.”

The next day, Anya woke Alexander up and made him breakfast. After Alexander had dressed himself, they walked to school. On the way there, Alexander became more and more quiet. He still laughed at Anya’s jokes and he still held conversation with his sister, but it was obvious something was bothering him. Anya noticed it too. “What’s wrong, buddy?” She asked him. “The kids at school don’t like me”, he told her, “they call me names and laugh at me.” “Do you know why they do that?”Anya asked curiously. Alexander thought for a moment, then he replied: “There’s one girl, Octavia Blake, who told me I looked silly and I would never be a real man and because of that, no one would love me. I don’t like her, and the other kids are afraid of her, so no one makes her stop bullying.” Alexander looked sad. "I would like to have a friend, too," he confessed. Anya hugged him. “You will get friends too, Alex, it just takes time. There are people out there who aren’t as stupid as Octavia Blake, they will be your friends." Anya hoped she sounded convincing. Worried, she left Alexander at his school, since her class was in another building.

“Bye Alex, see you after school.”

"Bye Anya, love you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone,  
> Thank you so much for reading my story. English is not my native language, but I hope it's still readable. I'm sorry for any mistakes. Let me know your thoughts and opinions. If you have an idea you would like to see in the story, let me know. Maybe I can include it in this story or I can use it in another story. 
> 
> I'm looking for someone who wants to read the story before publishing and help correct mistakes. If you're interested, let me know.
> 
> 2071 words


	2. Arizona Robbins

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter tells more about Alexander's life with Nia and Theo.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is corrected, thanks to my beta reader [soph_kom_trikru](http://archiveofourown.org/users/soph_kom_trikru)
> 
> enjoy reading!

Alexander sat in the back of the class, alone. He was drawing, while the other kids played together or played games on the computers. A few girls pretended to be princesses and the playing corner was their castle. He thought about what Anya had asked him.  _ Do I want to be a girl? Do I want to be a princess like the other girls?  _ He was so lost in his thoughts he didn’t notice that Octavia approached him or heard her question. She looked at him questioningly. “You lost your tongue, freak?” She asked. “Or are you talking to your imaginary friends, cause it looks like you don’t have any real ones.” A group had formed around them and everyone laughed at Octavia’s words. Alexander tried not to cry, but he failed. He thought about what his sister said and replied to Octavia: “One day, I will find people who aren’t as stupid and dumb as you are, they will be my friends. I don’t even want to be friends with you.”

Octavia just stood there, laughing at him. A sudden rage fled through him and before anyone could process what was happening, Octavia laid on the ground with Alexander on top of her. He hit her with his fists, blood flowed from her nose over her face. “Get of me, freak,” she growled at him.

“WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?” Their teacher asked. “Alexander, Octavia, to the headmaster, NOW!” Alexander knew not to argue with her, so he went to the headmaster’s office, as soon as he could, followed by Octavia. Just before they went inside, Octavia said to him: “This is all your fault, freak!” She pushed him aside and walked in the headmaster’s office.

Nia and Theo had gotten a phone call from the headmaster and came to school as soon as possible. In the headmaster’s office, the headmaster told Nia and Theo that their son had gotten in a fight with Octavia. Her parents were also informed and both kids weren’t allowed to come back to school today. They both had apologised and had to come to school early the following morning. Nia and Theo nodded, they didn’t know what to say.

On the way home, Alexander’s parents didn’t say a word to their son. When they were home, they ordered their son to sit on the couch. After a short talk in the kitchen, Nia and Theo joined their son on the couch and started their ‘talk’. “You can’t keep doing this, Alexander,” Theo said angrily. “You are causing us trouble and you are giving our family a bad name. You don’t want to do that, do you?” Alexander didn’t answer his father, which resulted in an angry mother. “As long as you continue this, we won’t treat you as our son. We deserve much more than this, we give you a lot and we are working hard for you, you could be a little less selfish and start thinking about us.” After those words, Nia left the room. “Choose wisely son, cause if you keep this up, we won’t be able to help you anymore.” Theo left the room too and now, Alexander sat on his own on the couch. Again, he didn’t completely understand what his parents meant, but he did understand that he did something wrong.  _ If they would just understand…… _

Less than a week later, Alexander got in a fight with Atom. He laughter at him because his voice didn’t sound like one of a boy. Alexander didn’t talk much in class, only to the teacher. When Atom heard his voice, he screamed through the whole class: “Alexander has a girl voice, Alexander is a girl.” Everyone laughed at him and his anger took over his body.

Again, no one spoke on the way back. This time, Anya witnessed the fight and insisted she went back home with her brother. Anya held his hand but was afraid to say something. This time, there was no talk. Nia went back to her office and Theo grabbed his laptop and went to work on the kitchen table. Anya took her brother upstairs. They both knew what was happening, their parents were acting like Alexander didn’t exist.

Nia and Theo had never laid a finger on their children, but that didn’t mean they didn’t hurt them. When they were disappointed in one of their kids, they would just act like it wasn’t there. They would leave early for work, came back late and only bothered to do the shopping. They left meals for Anya, but it was never enough to eat for two persons. Anya cooked them dinner and made sure they had breakfast and lunch.

When their parents were home, they only talked to Anya, who didn’t say much back. When their son was around, they talked about how great of a daughter Anya was and how smart she was.

Usually, it only went on for a few days, but this time, it didn’t end after a week. It wasn't that hard for Anya, she was used to taking care of her brother. Her parents didn't give her much love and attention either and after 11 years, Anya got used to it.

However, for Alexander, it wasn't so easy. He was struggling with himself and he needed his parents. He always craved for their attention, love and approval. He wanted to make them proud.

Anya noticed her brother struggling but when she asked him what was wrong, he didn't answer her. Instead, he shut her out.

Another week passed, still no change in their parents’ behavior. Anya was desperate, Alexander hardly ever talked to her and he fought a lot at school.

While Alexander was at school, Anya cleaned up his room. When she lifted up his book from his bedside table, she was surprised to find a note.

_ Hi Lexa, _

_ I'm sorry I can't meet with you today. I had an emergency surgery and there was no one who could take over for me. I hope you will talk to your sister, she cares about you. I will see you soon, the same as usual. Please call me if you need me. _

 

Take _ care, _

_ AZ _

A phone number was written on the note.  _ Who was AZ? Why did that person call her brother Lexa?  _ And then it hit her. Lexa is his new name. There are only a few people who know Alexander is ‘supposed’ to be a girl. Mom and dad wouldn't write that. Neither would her aunt. That left the school’s doctor and the doctor from the hospital.

After 15 minutes, Anya had enough courage to pick up her phone and dial the number from the note. “This is doctor Arizona Robbins, how can I help you?” The voice on the other side asked.

“Hello, my name is Anya, I am Alexander's sister,” she replied. “Is he okay, how did you get my number?” The doctor asked concerned. Anya didn't know how to explain what was going on. Everything was just so overwhelming, she started to cry. “Everything will be okay”, the doctor said, “Can you meet me at the hospital?” They worked out the details and said their goodbyes.

“Hi Anya, I'm Arizona Robbins”, the doctor introduced herself. “H-hi, I'm An-Anya,” Anya replied, stuttering. She started crying again and Arizona just held her, comforting her, until she calmed down. Anya told her everything about Alexander and how things were at home. Arizona listened to her carefully and asked a few questions. Then, on Anya’s request, Arizona told Anya about how Alexander came to her during schooltime and that he told her he wanted to be Lexa. At first, he was scared to tell her the sensitive things, but as their meetings continued, he opened up more and more to her.

After their talk, Anya felt relieved. She knew that the situation wasn't resolved, but it felt good having someone around her who actually cared. They decided that Anya would tell her brother that she knew about the meetings and if he was okay with it, she would come with him next times.

This continued for weeks. Nia and Theo ignored their children, they had meetings with Arizona during schooltime or in the evening. In those few weeks, Arizona was more of a parent for them than Nia and Theo had been in years. They felt safe with the doctor and Anya and Arizona did everything they could to help Alexander with his struggles. On his request, they called him Lexa and 'her’ instead of 'him’. Together, they celebrated Lexa’s 6th birthday with a real birthday cake, balloons and presents. It felt like they were a little family.

Arizona had many conversations with her boss, in the hope to help Anya and Lexa. But Nia and Theo were rich and since there wasn't any physical abuse, there wasn't much to do.

Until she met Echo, a drug user who overdosed and became Arizona’s patient. While Echo was in recovery, she had lots of nightmares. Normally, Arizona would wake her and wait until she could sleep again, but one night, Echo said something during her nightmare, that caught Arizona's attention. “Please, Theo, Nia, I will do better. I'm sorry.” Echo whispered. She kept repeating their names, over and over again.

Confused, Arizona woke Echo. Trembling, Echo accepted the glass with water and drank it. When Arizona kept staring at her, Echo asked her what was wrong. “What's the last name of Theo and Nia?” She asked. Echo didn't answer. Instead, she looked scared at Arizona. “I'm not supposed to tell anyone, but it seems like you know them,” she said. Arizona decided to tell Echo the story, this was her only hope.

_ A few months ago, I got a new patient. It was a five years old boy who was intersex. His parents only cared about their reputation. He is really insecure and he got in a lot of fights at school, because he got bullied. His parents didn’t care for him, they let their daughter take care of him. After another fight at school, they still refused to get him help. They refused to even listen to him, they just didn’t understand. Instead of listening, they ignored him completely. They left for work early, came back home late. His sister made sure he ate and took him to school. Weeks after I first met him, I saw him in the park, sitting alone on a bench during schooltime. I asked him why he was here and why he was alone. He told me he got kicked out of class, because he got in a fight again. His parents didn’t come to pick him up so he decided to walk home, but he didn’t want to go home so he ended up in the park. We talked a lot that day, and when I had to leave, I told him to stop by the hospital when he needed her. We saw eachother almost every day. When I didn’t have time, I left him notes. I took him a long time to really open up to me, but when he did, he told me everything. The most important, he told me he wanted to be Lexa instead of Alexander. So since then, I call him Lexa. His sister comes with him to the hospital most of the time and everytime they leave, I’m so worried that I won’t ever get to see them again. _

“That sounds really hard. I don’t understand what that has to do with me though.” Echo looked at her confused.

_ Anya and Lexa are the children of Nia and Theo Woods. They don’t care about their children, they never really have. I want to help them, I want to get them out of there and make sure they feel safe. But I can’t do anything, cause Nia and Theo are very rich and they don’t abuse their children physically, so there is no proof. _

“And you think I have proof of something bad they are involved in”, Echo finished Arizona’s thoughts. “Am I right?” The doctor asked. “You are and I will help you bring them down”, was the answer. “Tell me everything about them”, the doctor requested.

_ Nia and Theo Woods are the owners of Azgeda company. It’s one of the biggest companies in the world and they have a lot of power and money. They also have lots of connections inside and outside the country. I work for a drug dealer, I’m not giving you a name, but he is powerful. He is one of their connections. Nia and Theo don’t do anything with drugs, but they help him with the money and they erase his traces. You can’t go to the police, they have too much connections there. _

We’re not going to the police, Arizona told her. With that, she left the room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone,  
> Thank you for reading my story. In the next chapter, we will be 2 years further and Alexander will be Lexa.  
> I hope you enjoy reading.
> 
> 2148 words


	3. Lexa

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Timejump, two years later. We learn a little more about Anya and Lexa.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is corrected by my beta reader [soph_kom_trikru](http://archiveofourown.org/users/soph_kom_trikru)  
> Thank you so much. 
> 
> Enjoy reading!

TWO YEARS LATER

Lexa sat in the back of the class. She was in 3th grade and everything was way too easy for her. So when everyone was still working, Lexa was drawing. She wasn’t that talented, but she liked to do it anyway. She sat alone, no one wanted to sit next to her. She didn’t mind, she liked it quiet. She only talked when the teacher asked her something, which wasn’t very often. For an 8 year old, she was too quiet, but foster parents don’t care about that. They only care about their paycheck at the end of the month.

After school, she walked home with her foster brother, Wells. Wells was a year older than her and he was the only biological child of Thelonius Jaha. Wells’ mother died right after giving birth to her son. Jaha wasn’t a good foster parent. He hit them to make them listen to him. At the moment, Thelonius Jaha had 5 children at home. His own son, Wells, and 4 foster children, Lexa, Aden, Laura and Sam.

When they came home, Thelonius put them to work immediately. At 7.30 PM a new foster kid would arrive. They had to set up a bed for her and they had to clean their room and the ground floor. It didn’t take long, since they were with five of them, but it was not something a child should do in their free time. Luckily, they only had one room where they slept with the five of them. At least they didn’t have to clean five rooms.

At 7.30 PM exactly, the doorbell rang. Lexa was always scared of new people. Only Wells knew about her secret and she was afraid this new kid would find out and make fun of her. The children stayed upstairs, while Thelonius welcomed the new girl. He told the social worker that he wanted the girl to feel at ease before she would meet her brothers and sisters. The social worker agreed and left.

After a tour through the whole house except the bedroom, Thelonius took the girl downstairs and asked her to sit on the couch. He offered her a drink, which she declined. Then he went to get the other children to introduce them. Four kids sat on the couch across the new girl. “One of my daughters is a bit shy, she’s upstairs but you can meet her when you go unpack your things,” Thelonius said. “This is my own son, Wells. He is 9 years old. Then we have Aden and Sam, they are both 4 years old. Laura is 7 years old and Lexa, my other daughter is 8 years old. “Guys, this is Anya, she’s 14 and she’s going to live with us. Be nice to her and help her if you can,” Thelonius said.

The children took Anya upstairs, to their bedroom, while Thelonius went back to work. Anya dropped her bag on the empty bed and looked around. There were three wardrobes and six beds. There was a door to the bathroom and there was a chest with a few toys. On one side of the room, there was a bookcase with children’s books.

“Anya, we always go to Arkadia after school, do you want to come with us?” Wells asked her. What’s Arkadia? She wondered. As if Wells could read her mind, he explained what it was. It’s a help center for foster kids. You can go there every afternoon to play and hang out. There are a few supervisors and you can do lots of fun things there. You can also get Art therapy and stuff like that in there. “I think I want to stay here today, thanks for the invitation though,” Anya replied. “Okay, we will be back a little before bedtime, bye.” After that, Wells walked away.

Anya left her stuff packed. She grabbed her phone and sat on her bed. She was scrolling through instagram when she heard someone crying softly. She followed the sound and in the corner of the room, behind the last bed, a girl sat on the ground. Anya sat down a few meters next to her and asked: “Hi, I’m Anya, why are you crying?” The girl looked up and her green eyes looked familiar. “I know who you are Anya, I’m Lexa,” the girl replied. How would she know who I am? Anya thought. Before she could ask her question out loud, the girl said: “I’m your sister, but you don’t remember me, do you?” “I don’t have a sister”, Anya said, “my brother died two years ago.” “You have one now, Lexa said. When Anya looked at her confused, she started to explain.

“I was born as Alexander Woods. For five years I was a happy boy, I made my parents proud. But I always felt I was different. I got bullied at school, I fought back. I went to the hospital and the doctor told my parents I was intersex. After another fight, they acted like I didn’t exist. You took care of me, like always, but this time it was different. This time you weren’t the only one who wanted to help me. Desperate, I accepted her help. And it broke me.”

“You’re Alex.” Anya stated. “But you died when I was 12. I was at the funeral. I cried for months because my baby brother was gone. And now you’re telling me that all this time, my parents lied?” “Alexander Woods died that day, that’s not a lie,” Lexa said, “but Lexa didn’t.”

Anya wanted to ask so many questions, but they were interrupted by Thelonius. “I see you guys get along, he said. I’m happy with that. It’s bedtime for you Lexa.” Lexa stood up and walked to the bathroom. “What time do I have to go to bed, sir?” Anya asked. At 9 PM, you and the other kids have to go to bed. Aden and Sam don’t go to school, they go to Arkadia the whole day. Lexa has punishment, which is why she has to go to bed early. You’re welcome to sit in the livingroom if you want, but you can stay here too.” I’m going to bed, I’m a bit tired,” Anya answered. Thelonius nodded and left the room.

When Lexa came back from the bathroom, she wore pajamas and her hair hung loose over her shoulder. “I’m happy I got you back, Anya, but I’m sorry you’re in the system. I’m not allowed to talk after bedtime, but we will talk tomorrow.” She laid on her bed and stared at the ceiling. “I’m happy I got you back too, Lexa. My story isn’t pretty, but someday I will tell you. I love you”. “I love you too”.

Anya decided to try and get some sleep, but she couldn’t stop thinking about Lexa. About Alexander. Memories played in her head over and over again. After laying awake for hours, she finally fell asleep.

It felt like she had only slept for five minutes, when Anya woke up. She looked around her, to see what woke her. Everyone was deeply asleep, except for Lexa. She was sweating in her bed, mumbling words, moving in her sleep. She obviously had a nightmare. Anya climbed out of her bed and walked over to Lexa’s. No, no, mommy, please not mommy, Lexa mumbled in her sleep. Who is she talking about? Anya wondered.

Anya shook her up. Lexa woke up, she breathed heavily. Her eyes were filled with tears and she was trembling vehemently. Anya knew she was having a panic attack, so she grabbed Lexa’s hands and talked to her. “Just breath, Lexa, in…… and out…. Good, follow my breathing.” They continued like that for a few minutes, until Lexa could breath a little easier. “Can you count from ten to zero for me?” Anya asked. Anya started to count from ten to zero over and over again. Halfway, Lexa joined her. They kept counting until Lexa was breathing normally and she stopped trembling. Anya laid Lexa in her bed and turned around to go to her own bed. When she took a step, a hand grabbed her wrist and pulled her back. She crawled in Lexa’s bed and held her sister. Lexa curled up against her sister and, satisfied, she fell asleep.

The following morning, Thelonius woke everyone up at 8 AM. They all got dressed and went downstairs for breakfast. Soon, Anya noticed that Lexa was really shy. She barely spoke during breakfast and if someone asked her something, she stuttered and started fiddling with her sleeves. Anya got asked lots of questions and she answered all of them, but didn’t actually reveal much about her past. Lexa was the only one who noticed. When everyone finished breakfast, the older kids cleaned everything up. Wells, Lexa and Laura went to school. On the way there, they dropped Aden and Sam off at Arkadia. Anya stayed with Thelonius.

“You’ll be going to school soon, Thelonius told her, you just have to wait until your registration is completed. I hope you don’t mind, it will only take a few days.” “It’s no problem sir, is there anything I can do in the meantime? Anya offered. “Thank you for asking, but it’s not necessary. We have schedules for every week, next week we will give you a few chores. I have to go to work now, you can do whatever you want.” Thelonius replied. He gave her some money and left.

Anya had no idea what to do. During her time in foster care, she didn’t make any friends. The only one she wanted to see now was Lexa. She decided to go to the park and see if there was anything to do there.

Anya sat on a bench near the lake. She was looking at the people who walked by. She wondered if they were happy, if they had a family. For thirteen years, Alexander was her only real family and when he died, she was desperate. Now she had her back, she didn’t want to lose her again. She saw two kids playing soccer, they looked like twins. Their parents were laughing, looking at their children.

Her stomach creaked. She grabbed her phone and looked at the time. It was already 1.30 PM. She walked to the store to buy lunch. She returned to the bench in the park with her lunch and ate in silence. When she was finished, she stayed for a while, then she walked back home.

Lexa’s POV

When lunch was over, Lexa walked back to the classroom. Her teacher explained what they had to do that afternoon and everyone went to work. Lexa was far further than the rest of the class. Again, she was drawing and writing in the back of the class. The teacher noticed before that Lexa wasn’t working and had asked her why. When Lexa explained she was further than the rest of the class, the teacher let her continue drawing. At the beginning of the year, Thelonius told her she wasn’t smart enough to become a lawyer, which she really wanted to be, so she took her schoolwork home and worked really hard. She was really smart, Thelonius just wanted her to feel powerless.

With 10 minutes of the class left, the teacher told everyone to stop working and to clean up their tables. When all tables were cleaned up and everyone sat on their chairs, the teacher let them one by one go. Lexa was the only one left in the classroom. The teacher walked to her table and sat next to her. “You’re working hard in class, Lexa, and I am really happy with that.” The teacher complimented her. “But I’m worried about you. I never see you talk with the other kids. I never see you play with them during break. You always sit alone and I think it would be good for you to make friends and interact with people.” “I’m okay, ma’am, I can look after myself,” Lexa answered. “Why don’t you try to make friends?” The teacher asked. “Why would I?” Lexa asked. “I’ll be gone by the end of the school year. If I make friends now, I’ll have to leave them behind anyway, so why bother, if it’s only going to hurt me?” With that, Lexa hurried outside.

She walked home with Wells and Laura. On the way back, Wells and Laura were planning their midday in Arkadia. Lexa planned on taking Anya there today, but she didn’t feel the need to share that with them. She hadn’t told anyone about the fact that Anya was her sister.

At home, they found Anya in the living room, asleep on the couch. The whole living room and kitchen were cleaned and tidy. Anya must have been bored cause doing all that is a lot of work and Thelonius wasn’t home until 6 PM and they sure didn’t have a cleaner.

They grabbed fruit and something to drink and sat down on the dining table. “What do we do with that girl,” Laura asked. “I’ll stay with her until she wakes up and if we still have time, I’ll take her to Arkadia, Lexa offered. “Thanks Lexa,” Both Wells and Laura replied. When they finished their drinks and food, they left with a simple ‘bye Lexa’.

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys,  
> Thank you so much for reading. I posted the first chapter a few hours ago and I was so surprised and happy so see I already have 180 hits. I hope you enjoy reading the story. Everything is now mostly introduction, hopefully you will find the story more interesting when the introductions are over. 
> 
> 2237 words


	4. Alexander's death & Arkadia help center

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anya tells Lexa how she ended up in the foster care system. Lexa takes Anya to her safe haven.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My beta reader [soph_kom_trikru](http://archiveofourown.org/users/soph_kom_trikru) corrected most of the mistakes. Thank you so much.
> 
> Enjoy reading

Lexa sat on the couch next to a sleeping Anya. She was reading a book while waiting for her sister to wake up. When Anya finally did, she looked surprised to find Lexa sitting next to her. “Hi Lexa, how was school?” She asked her. Lexa didn’t know how to answer that, no one ever cared about it so no one ever asked. “It was okay, I guess,” Lexa replied, “my teacher was a bit stupid though.” “Why, what did she do?” Anya asked curiously. Lexa started to explain. 

“The kids at school don’t like me very much. They don’t know about… ‘Alexander’ but they think I’m weird. So I always sit alone and I work really fast. I am further than the rest of the class so, the past few days, when the others were working, I was drawing. The teacher noticed a while ago and after I explained, she let me draw.” 

“But today she didn’t?” Anya asked.

“She did,” Lexa continued, “but after school, when I was alone in the classroom, she started asking questions. She was worried because I never talked or played with the other kids. She asked me why I didn’t try to make any friends.”

” So, why don’t you?” Anya asked. 

“I’m going to screw up in this foster home, my social worker will find me a new foster home, I move to the other side of the state and I never see my friends again,” Lexa explained further. “I just don’t want to make friends, just to get hurt again when I have to leave them behind. It’s bad enough that at one point, I’ll have to leave you behind.”

“I understand,” Anya said. “I do the same.” “Anya, how did you end up in foster care, what happened with Nia and Theo?” Lexa asked her sister. Anya sighed. “You deserve to know, but it’s not a funny story,” she said. “That’s okay,” Lexa replied, “foster kids don’t have funny stories”. 

 

Anya’s POV 

_ It all happened so fast. I remember we met with Arizona that morning. We were talking happily on the way back home. Then, mum and dad called. They wanted to talk to me and they asked me to leave you somewhere outside, they didn’t want you to cause any trouble. I left you at the soccer field with the soccer ball and you promised to stay there. I was going to pick you up and walk you home after mum and dad were done talking.  _

_ I went home as fast as I could and when I got there, mum, dad and our aunt sat on the dinner table. I joined them and dad started talking. “We’re really sorry for how we treated you, honey.” He said. “We want to make it up to you.” He grabbed a box and gave it to me. It was wrapped in gift paper with a bow on the top. I opened it and it was the newest Apple laptop. I knew it was just to buy me back, but I took it anyway.  _

 

“I hoped we could play on it together, Lex,” Anya told her, “but we never could.”

 

_ I was bringing the laptop to my room when I heard the phone ringing. Mom picked up the phone and then there was panic downstairs. I ran down the stairs and asked them what was wrong. “It was the police,” mom said. “Alexander was in a car accident.”  _

_ We went to the hospital as fast as we could. Mom and dad looked sincerely concerned about you and for a minute, I hoped we could be a family again. But when we arrived at the hospital, we were brought to an office. Arizona came to us and told us the bad news. You died on the way to the hospital. They did everything they could, but they hadn’t been able to save you.  _

 

Anya was crying like she experienced it all over again. Lexa wrapped her arms around her sister and comforted her. After a few minutes, Anya continued her story.

 

_ I wasn’t allowed to see you. I wasn’t allowed to say goodbye. The funeral came and everything hurt so much. I put flowers on your grave and that was it. Mom and dad continued work and I had to go to school. I could barely get up in the morning, I barely ate. I was getting depressed and our parents didn’t even notice it. My teacher did notice and she made an appointment with the school’s psychologist. I didn’t want to talk to her, every time I was there, I didn’t say a word. When she spoke about you, I always started to cry. Eventually, she gave up on me. I knew it was my own fault, but I felt rejected. Because she didn’t try harder.  _

_ Arizona reached out to me almost every day. She kept sending texts but when I told her I wasn’t ready to see her, she didn’t push me. She told me that she tried to win custody over you and me and that she still wanted to help me. She told me that our parents were laundering money for a drug dealer and possibly other people. For months I tried to find evidence. At some point, she stopped sending me texts. I thought she didn’t want me anymore. I kept searching because I thought that if I would find evidence, she would still want me. _

_ When I finally found enough evidence, I sent it to her. Two days later, Nia and Theo got arrested. I was brought to the precinct and they questioned me. When they were done with me, a social worker took me to our house. I had to grab some clothes and special stuff. I thought I was going to live with Arizona, but they brought me to one of their offices. I stayed there for three days. At first, I thought it was just protocol, but when I asked when I could live with Arizona, they looked confused at me. They told me that no one had showed up to take me in and since our aunt was arrested too and there was no other family, I was going into the foster care system.   _

_ After I had all the right papers and stuff, I was placed in a group home. I had to go to a new school and I stayed there for a few months. Then I went from foster home to foster home, hoping that someday, Arizona would come looking for me. But she never did. After lots of group homes and foster families, I got here and I’m glad I found you.  _

 

They were both crying, seeking comfort in each other. They laid on the couch, cuddling, until Thelonius came back. silently, they helped him cooking dinner. They set the table and waited for the other kids. When everyone was there, they ate dinner. Everyone was talking about their day, except Anya and Lexa. They both had so many questions, but they didn’t know how to ask. 

When everything was cleaned up, the other kids had to do homework or do something for themselves. “Sir, are Anya and I allowed to go to Arkadia? I would like to show it to her and we both don’t have homework.” Lexa asked. “Sure, be back before bedtime,” Thelonius replied.  They grabbed their coats and headed to Arkadia. 

“So, how long have you been in this foster home?” Anya asked. She hoped Lexa would tell her about her past, but she was afraid to ask. “I’ve been here for three months now,” Lexa replied. She expected Anya to ask about her past, but she understood that Anya might be a little uncomfortable with asking. Instead, she decided to take the initiative. “I know you must have lots of questions, but right now, I’d rather show you Arkadia without talking about my past. I promise you, as soon as we have time, I’ll answer your questions.” “That’s okay, Lexa, I understand,” Anya replied. 

When they arrived at Arkadia, Anya looked really surprised. From the outside, it didn’t look like a help center at all. It looked more like an elementary school or something like that. They entered the building and stood in the hall. The walls were painted in bright colours and the coat racks were made of wood in the form of animals, also painted. 

They hung their coats on the coat rack and entered the first room. It looked like a living room. There were several couches and chairs. Near the entrance was the reception. “Hi Lexa, who’s your friend?” The woman behind the reception asked. “Indra, this is my sister, Anya. Anya, this is Indra, she works here,” Lexa introduced them.  They greeted each other and shook hands. “Is there anything I can do for you?” Indra asked. “Thank you Indra, I think we'll be fine. I'm going to show Anya around,” Lexa replied. 

They walked further and entered a room which looked like a little restaurant. There were little tables everywhere and some couches and lots of chairs. On each table laid a menu, flowers and a candle. You could see a part of the kitchen and there was a bar. Music was playing and about fifteen people sat in the room. “You can get a drink and food in here”, Lexa explained. “If you can pay for it, you do, but if you can't, then it's free. They get money from the government but it's never enough, there are just so many children out there who need this. They have lots of volunteers working here and they get donations.” Anya was impressed. “It's good that a place like this exist,” she said, “and it's beautiful that there are people out there, who actually care about foster kids,” she said. 

They went on to the next room. There were music instruments laying everywhere. “Obviously, this is the music room,” Lexa said. “You can play any instrument you want and every Sunday from 2 PM until 4 PM, there is a music teacher who can help you.” “You play an instrument?” Anya asked Lexa. “I can play piano”, she replied, “and guitar a little bit but that's really difficult. You?” “I can't play an instrument but I would like to learn how to play the drums,” Anya answered. 

They walked through and across all the other rooms. There were offices where people could talk with therapists and there were lunch places for the staff. There was a medical department, with always one doctor present. 

Anya was really impressed. This was a safe haven for so many people. And everyone who came here regularly, helped within the organization. She learned that there were more places like this and she wondered why she hadn't heard of it before. “It could have saved her” Anya whispered. Still, Lexa was able to hear it. “It could have saved who, Anya?” She asked. “A-a friend, she replied with a sad voice, from a former foster home. Sh-she killed herself because she didn't have a safe haven like this and everything was just too much ofr her.” “I'm sorry,” Lexa said. “I shouldn't have asked.”

They continued their tour. Lexa told her about different kinds of therapy, which therapists she liked the most and she told funny stories about the kids she met here. Anya could see that Lexa felt comfortable in this place, she wasn't nervous looking around and she didn't fiddle with her sleeves like she did at home. 

“This is the last room,”Lexa said, “it's my favorite.” They walked into a room with walls covered in paintings. “This is the art room,” she explained, “I spend a lot of time in here, even though I'm not that good at drawing and stuff, I still enjoy it.” “It looks great,” Anya said, “do you have anything to show me?” Lexa showed her sister a few drawings and Anya complimented her. “Girls, it's 8.30, time to leave,” Indra told them. “The place closes at 10 PM but I have to go to bed at 9 PM so we have to leave, I'm sorry,” Lexa apologized. “No problem,” Anya replied. They went back to the hall, grabbed their coats and went back home.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll update as soon as possible but I don't have much time to write and if I post a chapter, I want it to be 2000+ words. Thank you so much for the kudos and hits, I'm really happy with it. 
> 
> I hope you still enjoy this fic. Let me know if something bothers you, maybe I'll be able to fix it.
> 
> 2046 words


	5. Lexa's rescue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anya finds out why Lexa is always so nervous. She also gets answers she never expected to get.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning, violence is included in this chapter. If you feel uncomfortable reading, let me know and I can send you a summary about this chapter. 
> 
> Enjoy reading
> 
> This chapter is corrected, thanks to my beta reader [soph_kom_trikru](http://archiveofourown.org/users/soph_kom_trikru). Thank you for helping me.

On the way back, Anya noticed that the closer they got to their home, the more nervous Lexa became. She started fiddling with her sleeves and she looked really uncomfortable. “What’s wrong, Lex?” Anya asked. “Ehmm I-I…..” Lexa didn’t know how to explain. “It’s okay, you don’t have to tell me,” Anya reassured her, “I just want you to feel safe.” “Is it okay if we talk tomorrow? I can’t do this right now.” Lexa asked. “Of course, Lex.” Anya wrapped her arms around her sister.

When they got home, Thelonius wasn't there. Anya wondered where he was, but her question was answered immediately. “Thelonius took Aden and Sam to the hospital,” Wells told them. “He got mad and broke Aden’s arm. He didn't want to leave Sam with us, so he took him with him.” Anya was shocked, but it seemed like the other kids weren't surprised. “Does this happen often?” Anya asked, still shocked. Lexa grabbed Anya's arm and pulled her upstairs to their bedroom. She sat down on her bed and motioned for Anya to sit next to her.

Anya sat down on Lexa’s bed and gave her a questioning look. “This foster home is one of the bad ones,” Lexa started. “When we do something that bothers Thelonius, he gets really mad. He hits us, but no one cares about it.” Anya looked at her, concerned.

“Lex, you can't stay here. He could kill you. What if he causes one of you permanent damage? It's not safe here.” Anya tried to stay calm. “I finally got you back, and I'm happy with that, but I'd rather be separated again, than you ending up in the hospital, Lex.”

“I can't do anything. Besides, there are so many other foster homes which are far worse than this. You probably know that.” Lexa replied.

“Why were you so uncomfortable on the way home? Did you know this would happen?” Anya asked.

“I didn't know if it would happen, but every time I go home, I'm afraid for what I will find there. It’s not the first time things like this happen,” Lexa confessed. Anya didn't know what to say, she just nodded.

Lexa looked at the clock, it was 8.56 PM. “I have to get changed and wash my teeth but after that, we can talk further. Thelonius probably won’t be back until midnight, but I still have punishment and I don’t want it to get worse.” Lexa did as announced and crawled under her blanket. She patted the space next to her and Anya sat down beside her.

“I know you feel betrayed by Arizona”, Lexa said, “But she never abandoned you.” “You know what happened.” Anya stated. “I do,” Lexa replied, “and I’ll tell you”.  

 

_When you left me at the soccer field, I didn’t expect any trouble. I was shooting at the goal while waiting for you. I was there for five minutes when Arizona appeared. She told me I had to come with her, it was really important. She told me she had let you know that I was with her so I went with her. We stepped into her car and she drove us to her house. I didn’t understand why she was acting so weird, she was really nervous and constantly watching around her. When we were inside, she told me to put on the clothes that laid on her bed. I did and she grabbed my old ones. Downstairs, a friend of her was waiting. She took the clothes and left the house. Arizona said she had to take care of something. She left me at her house, told me in the other room were toys to play with._

_When she was back, she looked less worried. She brought home dinner and we ate together on the couch. “What’s going on Arizona?” I asked her. “You’ve been acting weird since you picked me up and I want to know why.” Then she told me everything._

_She met this girl, Echo, in the hospital. She was her patient. Apparently, Echo knew that Nia and Theo were involved with money laundering. They also did that for Echo’s drug dealer, which is how she knew. Echo had offered to give a statement to the police if Arizona needed it but Arizona had other ideas. She knew our parents had too much money, if she went to the police, they’d never end up in jail. Instead, she blackmailed them to get custody over us. They were willing to give her custody over me, but they didn’t want to give you up. They also didn’t want anyone to know they gave me away cause that would affect their reputation. So they decided to fake my death. I don’t know how they did it, but I went to live with Arizona under a new name, Lexa._

 

She never gave up on you, Anya. When I lived with her, she was always busy, trying to find a way to save you. She worked less time in the hospital and spent more time to try saving you. I tried to help her but it was really hard.

 

_Arizona had a boyfriend, Jeff. He spent a lot of time at Arizona’s house but they didn’t live together. Sometimes he stayed the night, but Arizona always told me I would come first. Jeff was really nice. He knew about me being intersex and he was really supportive. Arizona got me all the right papers, I don’t know how, but I could continue my life. She registered me at a new school and I started there two weeks after she saved me. I was really happy cause at school, everyone called me Lexa Robbins. I was really scared that people would find out I have male parts, so I didn’t make any friends. My classmates didn’t really hate me, but sometimes, they bullied me because I was shy. It wasn’t that bad and I actually started to like school. I learned a lot and the teacher always gave me extra work._

_A few months later, Jeff moved in with us. In the beginning, everything was good. He helped in the household, he played soccer with me and he made Arizona really happy. But slowly, things started to change. Of course, people were mad sometimes and they screamed but Jeff was mad a lot. He screamed at me and Arizona and he said very mean things. Things that made us doubt ourselves. Arizona always protected me, but couldn’t stay at home 24/7 so sometimes, I was alone with Jeff. When it was only the two of us, he treated me like I was his maid. I had to get him food and drinks, I had to grab this and that. When he didn’t need me, I had to stay in my room and be quiet._

_I don’t exactly know when it started, but after a while, he started getting violent. The night he hit Arizona for the first time, we both never expected him to become the monster he became. He apologised the next day with lots of flowers and he said sorry a hundred times a day. Until a week later, it happened again. And again, and again. He was a doctor so he knew exactly what he could do and what story to tell the doctors who treated us. Most times, he or Arizona knew how to treat our injuries and we didn’t even have to go to the hospital._

_Arizona always stood up for me, which made him only angrier. She always told me how much she loved me and she would always protect me. She was sorry this happened to me. I guess she didn’t understand she was in it too. Maybe she just felt too guilty to see none of this was her fault._

_Anyway, about half a year later, Arizona came home late. She went to Echo until late. I didn’t know what she was doing there, neither did Jeff. He accused her of cheating on him with Echo. Arizona told him she wasn’t, but she never told him what she did do there. He threw her to the wall and started hitting her. He kept hitting and hitting. I ran to my room and called the police. When he heard me on the phone, he came after me. He beat me up pretty badly._

_He was just about to kick me in my stomach again, when someone broke the door open. We were upstairs and before the police reached us, Jeff had pulled out a gun. He shot Arizona first, then he shot himself. He died immediately but Arizona was still alive. We were brought to the hospital, she went into surgery and I had to sit in the waiting room._

_I sat there for hours. An officer stayed with me and asked me several times what happened. I was still in shock and didn’t know how to tell him, but I managed to explain what Jeff did. Finally, a doctor came to us. She introduced herself as Abby Griffin. She told me something about Arizona’s injuries and then she dropped the bomb. “Your mother died during surgery,” She said. She told me things like ‘they did everything they could’ and ‘I’m sorry for your loss’. I started crying and she wrapped her arms around me. She took me to a private room and stayed the rest of the night with me._

_The following morning, an officer came to us. He brought the most important things from Arizona’s house and brought me to an office of the foster care system. I was registered and they brought me to a group home. After that, I went from group home to foster home and back._

_Echo visited me and told me she received evidence of my parents illegal activities and asked me for permission to bring them down. I gave her permission which is why our parents were arrested. In that moment, all I could think about was Arizona. I did this because she worked so hard for it. I didn’t think about what would happen with you. A few days later, I realised you would end up in foster care because of me. I felt so guilty but I couldn’t reverse it._

 

“I’m really sorry you ended up in the system, Anya.” “I know,” Anya replied, “and I don’t blame you for that.” They laid down and cuddled up to each other. Slowly, they drifted off to sleep, exhausted from all the emotional stress.

The following morning, everyone acted like nothing happened. Aden had a green arm cast around his left arm. They ate their breakfast, cleaned up and the others went to school, while Anya stayed home. This time, she decided to clean the whole first floor. She only took a break to eat lunch and went back to work. While cleaning, she also put everything were it belonged. She was just finished, when Laura, Lexa and Wells came back from school and Aden and Sam from Arkadia. Anya gave them all something to eat and drink before they went their own ways. Laura went with Aden and Sam to a neighbor, Wells went to basketball practise and Lexa stayed with Anya. They sat on the couch, watching tv. Both didn’t know what to say after last night.

“How did it-”

“How was-”

Anya and Lexa said at the same time. “You can go first,” Anya said.

“How was your day?” Lexa asked. “Did you do anything special?” “Nothing special,” Anya replied. “I cleaned the whole first floor and I put everything back where it belonged.” “Wow, that must have been a lot of work. Thank you for helping, normally Wells, Laura and I have to do it in the weekend.” They talked about their days and shared their favorite memories from when they still lived together.

They were so caught up in their conversation, they didn’t notice the front door opened. Thelonius came in and saw them sitting on the couch. “Have you done your homework, Lexa?” He asked. “We haven’t got any homework,” Lexa replied scared.  Thelonius got mad. He started screaming at Lexa. “OF COURSE YOU HAVE HOMEWORK. DIDN’T THE TEACHER GAVE YOU EXTRA WORK BECAUSE YOU ARE TOO DUMB? GO TO YOUR ROOM AND DON’T RETURN!” He threw a book at her and left the room.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading this fic. I already have over 800 hits and 39 kudos, I'm so happy with it. I try to update at least once a day but I won't always be able to do that. In two weeks, my new school year starts do then I can't update every day. I'm not promising a schedule, cause it'll only disappoint you when there's no new chapter. 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed reading. 
> 
> 2065 words


	6. Memories

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexa has a panick attack, Anya helps her. Two happy memories revealed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My beta reader, [soph_kom_trikru](http://archiveofourown.org/users/soph_kom_trikru) has corrected the chapter. Thank you so much. 
> 
> Enjoy reading

When Anya looked at her sister, her heart broke. Lexa stood next to the couch. She was trembling so bad, she couldn’t stand still. She was silently crying and she was barely breathing. Her eyes were filled with fear. She had wrapped her arms around herself. When Anya laid her hand on her arm, she flinched. “S-sorry, I-I d-didn’t mean to,” Lexa trembled even worse and her breathing was very irregular. Anya could see her sister had trouble breathing. 

“Lex, listen to my voice.” Anya tried to calm her down. “Take a deep breath. Breathe in….. and breathe out.” She repeated it a few times. She noticed Lexa calmed down when she heard Anya’s voice, so Anya started telling her one of her favourite memories. “Remember that time when the woman from next door had bought us finger paint?”

 

_ I was 10 and you were 4 or 5 years old. The woman from next door had bought finger paint for her grandchild but he was 9 and he thought it was childish so he didn’t want to paint with it. She knew it was nice for someone your age so she gave it to our nanny. Our nanny, Emori, gave us a big sheet of paper and finger paint. We wrote our names and mom and dad’s on it and we made handprints on it. Until I accidentally spilled some paint in your hair. You looked at me offended and pushed both of your hands in my face. While Emori was texting her boyfriend, we were having a paint fight through the whole living room. By the time she remembered she had to watch us and came check if everything was okay, the whole living room was covered in paint. The house did look more happy but Emori wasn’t finished with cleaning by the time Nia and Theo came home. She was fired immediately and Nia and Theo hired five cleaners to clean up all the paint.  _

 

Anya and Lexa were both laughing. Lexa had calmed down and had stopped trembling. “Thanks Anya, I really needed that,” she said. She still looked a bit scared and she was still nervous but she felt safer when her sister was around. “C’mon, let’s go upstairs.” Anya held her sister’s hand and led them upstairs. 

For the rest of the evening, they remained upstairs. When dinner was ready, Lexa wasn’t allowed to come eat. She forced Anya to go downstairs, otherwise her sister would get in trouble too and she didn’t want that. After everyone had finished dinner, Lexa was allowed to eat the leftovers. She didn’t eat much and she was really scared of Thelonius. In less than 15 minutes, she finished eating, cleaned up the table and went upstairs. Soon, Anya joined her upstairs and they watched a movie on her phone. When it was bedtime, they slept together in Lexa’s bed. 

After two days, Lexa was allowed to eat with the rest of the family. She was still scared and nervous but it got better by time. That monday, Anya started school. She was in high school and had lots of homework. Often, Lexa did hers at the same time and she helped Anya when she was done earlier. 

After two weeks of living with Thelonius, he hit Anya for the first time. Anya had been abused in other foster homes, but that didn’t make it any easier. She only had a nose bleed and a bruise on her cheek but it still hurt. Lexa treated her wounds and made sure it wasn’t serious damage. “Arizona taught me a lot medical stuff and sometimes, she took me with her to the hospital and I shadowed the nurses”, Lexa explained when Anya asked her how she knew how to do all that. Anya saw that every time Lexa thought about her past, her eyes were filled with sadness and hurt. “How did you manage to cope with it?” Anya asked. “With what?” “With losing the woman who saved you and cared for you more than your own mother did.” “I wrote it all down,” Lexa told her. “Arizona always encouraged me to talk to her and when she died, I started to write down what I wanted to say to her. When I was in foster homes and group homes, I didn’t go to school very often. I didn’t have any friends so I had enough time to write. I didn’t write every day, only when I actually had something to say.” “I admire how you handled all that on your own when you were only 7 years old. You shouldn’t have been in a situation like that, but I admire you, Lexa. You probably have no idea how strong you are, because no one ever told you that.” “Thank you, Anya.” With tears in her eyes, Lexa smiled at her sister and gave her a hug. 

It went on for weeks. Thelonius got mad at them, sometimes he hit them and Lexa treated everyone’s injuries. The older children protected each other and the younger kids. Aden and Sam really needed parents, Anya noticed. Lexa had that too when she was little. She liked to cuddle and she always wanted bedtime stories. She loved it when she was allowed to do things adults did too and when she succeeded, she was always so proud. She always wanted to make the people she loved proud and happy. 

So when Aden or Sam asked Anya to read a story, she did. When they showed her their drawings, she complimented them a hundred times. When they did a competition, she always let them win. When they were sad, she cuddled with them. Slowly, she became their mother figure. 

In the weeks that followed, everything got worse. Thelonius started drinking more and more. When he was drunk, he didn’t stop hitting. Most of the times, the children were able to lock themselves up in their bedroom, blocking the door with beds. The older kids understood what was happening, but for Aden and Sam, It was very confusing. They were so scared that every time Anya left the room, they started crying, afraid she wouldn’t come back. As a result, Anya didn’t leave their side when they were at home. When they were at Arkadia, the boys weren’t scared. Only if Anya didn’t come to pick them up at 3.30 PM, they started crying and screaming her name. Anya knew it wasn’t good for them to depend so much on her, but she didn’t want to make their situation worse than it already was. 

Monday afternoon, Anya came back from school late. Luckily, she was still home before Thelonius, but the reason she was late was bad. “Family meeting in 10,” Anya announced. She grabbed something to drink and an apple and went upstairs. She put her books in the bookcase and she hung her bag on a hook. Ten minutes later, Wells, Laura and Lexa joined her upstairs. 

“What’s wrong?” Laura asked right away. “I have bad news”, Anya sighed. “Our class is going on a trip to a company to shadow the people there for two days. We’re going camping there for two nights and it’s compulsory. Which means I won’t be here for three days.”

“What about money, do you have to pay to go on the trip?” Wells asked. “No, the money for the trip was included with the parental contribution you had to pay with the registration.” Anya gave them a sad look. 

“We can manage,” Lexa said confidently. “Anya deserves to get out of here, even if it’s only for three days.” She looked at Wells and Laura. “We just have to make sure Aden and Sam won’t make Thelonius upset,” Lexa said. “You’re right, Lexa. Anya, you deserve this, you should go,” Laura said. Anya still hesitated. “I don’t want to leave you guys here. You all have been in here longer than me, you deserve it more to go away for a while.” “Looks like it’s already decided, Anya. When do you leave?” Laura asked happily. 

 

Anya would be leaving in a week. Thelonius didn’t have any reason to not let her go, so he didn’t object. Since their talk a few weeks ago about how she managed to cope with Arizona’s loss, Lexa had thought about her diary a lot. It was full of beautiful memories, but it also reminded her of the the family she would never have.  She wanted to relive the memories so badly, but she was also scared. But Anya deserved to know about her past. It made her sister feel less distant cause after all, they missed two years from each other’s lives. She knew her sister wanted to ask more about her past, but Anya saw how much it hurt her to talk about it so she didn’t. 

The children had developed a routine. Everyday, Laura, Wells, Anya and Lexa walked from school to home together. On the way back, they picked up Aden and Sam from Arkadia or the neighbors. At home, they all sat at the dining table. Anya and Wells gave everyone a drink and a piece of fruit. Aden and Sam went either to Arkadia or to the neighbors. If the older kids had homework, they did that in the bedroom. When they hadn’t, they usually went to Arkadia. Wells had basketball practise every wednesday and Laura sometimes visited friends from school. No one ever brought friends home with them, afraid of what Thelonius might do. Anya and Lexa spent every afternoon together, catching up to the two years they missed from each other’s life. Usually, they talked about the fun things, things they did or didn’t enjoy and they talked about memories from when they were little. 

However, today, Lexa decided they wouldn’t talk about the fun memories. They wouldn’t talk at all. Today, Lexa wanted Anya to read some pages of her diary. She knew her sister had to know one day, why should she wait? So when Anya and Lexa were alone in the house, Lexa grabbed her sister’s hand and led them upstairs. She motioned for Anya to sit on the bed and pulled out her diary. “I told you about my diary before,” Lexa started, “I marked a few pages, I want you to read them. I trust you not to read other pages.” Anya didn’t know how to react. She wanted to read it. She wanted to know more about her sister’s past, about who she became and why. But on the other hand, she knew Lexa had been through a lot and Anya wasn’t sure her sister was ready to share it. “Are you sure about this,” Anya asked. “Cause if you changed your mind or if you’re not ready, I understand. I know this is a big step for you.” “I’m sure Anya, I trust you.” Anya nodded and reassured her she would only read the marked pages. Lexa left the room to give Anya some privacy and Anya made herself comfortable on the bed before beginning to read. 

The first page Lexa wrote when she was in a foster home when she was 7. She wrote about her best memory. 

 

_ My best memory _

_ When I was 6, I lived with Arizona. She wasn’t my biological mother, she was a better one. She made me feel safe and wanted. When I was with her, I could be Lexa instead of Alexander. When I lived with her for a week, we had an important conversation. She asked me if I’d rather be Lexa or Alexander. That was an easy decision, I wanted to be Lexa. I asked her if that was okay and she told me that whatever I decided, it was okay, as long as I was hundred percent sure about it. I told her I was hundred percent sure about it and she just nodded, like I had just told her what I wanted for dinner.  _

_ A few days after that, she told me I had to go through some tests in the hospital, to see if I was completely healthy. She also told me that surgery was an option, but that I could choose for that when I’m eighteen. She was the one who could decide right now, because I was too young, and decided she didn’t want me to have the surgery. She also explained to me why. If I would get surgery to remove my penis and get female parts, my body would treat it like it was an injury. It would constantly try to heal it which could result in permanent damage. I didn’t understand what damage that would be, but she was a doctor, she would know.  _

_ A few days later, we walked into the hospital. In one hand, I held my bag, with my other hand I grabbed Arizona’s hand. She gave me a reassuring smile as we walked over to the pediatric wing from the hospital. She led me to a room with six beds and told me to pick one. I picked the one by the window and dropped my bag on it. She left the room so I could change in my pyjamas. She came back with a doctor. She introduced me to doctor Montgomery, who would do the tests since Arizona wasn’t allowed to. Arizona had told everyone she adopted me, so no one was suspicious about why she suddenly had a child.  _

_ I had to stay the night for the tests. I wasn’t really scared, Arizona would be with me and she told me it didn’t hurt. The tests themselves weren’t that bad. Arizona held my hand whenever it was possible and she never left my side. Well, except one time when she went to steal us some cupcakes from the attendings room. They did lots of tests and talked about medical stuff I didn’t understand, but Arizona explained everything to me. Exhausted from all the needles and machines that I had seen that day, I fell asleep, curled up to Arizona’s side.  _

_ The following morning, doctor Montgomery woke us. It was already 10 AM and we still had to do some tests. At 2 PM, we were finally allowed to leave the hospital. Arizona wouldn’t stop talking about how proud she was of me. It made me so happy to finally hear that someone was proud of me. I told her how happy I was that she was so supportive. In those two weeks I lived with her, she showed me more love my parents showed me in six years. I always missed Anya, I always will, but I can’t deny I felt really happy that day. We went home to drop our bags there and grab the soccer ball before heading to the park.  _

_ We played soccer the whole afternoon. We only took a break to eat ice cream, which ended in a food fight. We were laughing so much, our stomachs hurt. Arizona was really good at playing soccer and she taught me very cool tricks. She promised me we would visit clubs and see if I could get on a team somewhere.  _

_ Exhausted from our day we went home. On our way back, we grabbed dinner. We ate on the couch, watching Alvin and the chipmunks. When we finished the movie, Arizona brought me to bed. I always wanted mum and dad to read me bedtime stories, but they always refused. I was scared to ask Arizona, but we had so much fun, I just did. “Of course, Lexi,” she replied, “I’d love to read you a bedtime story.” She read me a story and tucked me in. She wished me goodnight and left my room.  _

_ I was trying to fall asleep, but I couldn’t. I suddenly realised I hadn’t thought about Anya all day. While I was having fun, she was still with mom and dad. And I forgot about her. I wished I could share moments like that with her, but I haven’t seen her since she left me at the soccer field. Now Arizona is dead, I’ll never get to share Arizona’s love with Anya. Arizona never got to apologise to Anya, she never got to take her out for ice cream. They would never have food fights. I cried myself to sleep that night, promising that, when Anya was living with me and Arizona, I would make her feel safe and loved, like Arizona did with me. I would tell my sister how much I love her and how she was the most important person in my life. But I probably never get to do that.  _

 

Crying, Anya put down the diary. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't want to stop in the middle of the memory so I just wrote a bigger chapter.  
> I hope you enjoyed reading.  
> I'm not sure if I can update tomorrow. I have my first piano lesson and I have some other stuff to do. I only post if I have more than 2000 words. 
> 
> Thank you so much for all the comments and kudos. 
> 
> 2784 words


	7. 'That night'

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anya goes on a school trip. Lexa, Laura and Wells have to survive without Anya's help.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is corrected thanks to [soph_kom_trikru](http://archiveofourown.org/users/soph_kom_trikru)  
> Thank you for your hard work. 
> 
> Enjoy reading!
> 
> TRIGGER WARNING! Violence included in this chapter. If you feel uncomfortable reading, let me know and I sent you a summary without violence.
> 
> I've exchanged Sam and Aden's names sometimes. This is important for upcoming chapters. If you find a mistake, please let me know.

The past few days, Lexa was avoiding her sister. When she gave Anya her diary, she trusted her sister not to read the unmarked pages and she had a good feeling about sharing her past with Anya. But while Anya was reading, Lexa had plenty of time to think about it and her insecurities took over.  _ What if she would think I was selfish? What if she was mad because I forgot about her?  _ Lexa thought. She opened herself up to her sister and now, she was scared it would ruin their bond forever. She wanted to talk to her sister, but she was too insecure. She knew she had to, though. Anya would be leaving in a few days, they had to make sure everything would work out. 

Finally, after three days avoiding Anya, Lexa had gathered enough courage to go talk to her sister. The other kids were at Arkadia, while Anya was upstairs doing homework. Lexa walked to their bedroom and knocked. “Lex, why are you knocking on our door? You realise it’s your bedroom too, right?” Anya gave her sister a confused look. Lexa turned red from embarrassment. She wanted to turn around and walk away but Anya told her to come in and sit down. She sat down on her bed and tried to figure out what to say. Anya waited patiently until her sister would say something. 

“I’m sorry I avoided you the past few days.” Lexa stared nervously at the ground. “I was scared you might be mad at me.” “Why would I be mad at you?” Anya asked surprised. “Well, ahm, I forgot about you. I was having fun while you were still with Nia and Theo.” Lexa confessed. Anya moved forward and took her sister’s hands in her own. “Lex, listen to me. You have nothing to be sorry for. You were allowed to have fun with Arizona. You were allowed to not think about me 24/7. You’re just a child, Lex. You shouldn’t worry about things like this. And I’ll never be mad at you for something that isn’t your fault. I’m really happy Arizona took such good care of you.”

Lexa didn’t know how to respond. Instead of saying something, she hugged her sister. “Thank you, Anya. I love you.” “I love you too, sis.”

Anya continued her homework with Lexa’s help and was done in an hour. The sisters decided to watch a movie. “We only have a few DVD’s,” Lexa said. “Thelonius doesn’t want to pay for Netflix and we hardly ever watch movies.” “That’s okay,” Anya replied. “Shall we watch UP?” Lexa put the DVD in the DVD player and they sat down on the couch. They stopped watching halfway through the movie. Thelonius would be home in about ten minutes and they didn’t want to make him angry so they decided to go upstairs. 

Upstairs, Lexa suddenly thought about Anya’s school trip. She started fiddling with her sleeves again, Anya noticed it right away. “What’s wrong, sis?” Anya gave her a concerned look. “You’re leaving in a few days. I think we can handle it but I’m still scared. Aden and Sam are really attached to you.” Anya thought for a moment, then she answered her sister. “It’s only for two days and I’ll stay in touch with Wells. If something happens, you can text me with his phone and I’ll come home right away.” Lexa just nodded and embraced the older girl. 

In the days before Anya’s school trip, the children tried to prepare Aden and Sam for Anya’s absence. They didn’t fully understand what was going on but Anya reassured them twenty times a day that she would come back no matter what happened. Aden and Sam spent a little more time with Lexa and Laura, but they still demanded Anya to read bedtime stories. The preparations went well but everyone was slightly nervous. 

The night before Anya would leave, Lexa had a terrible nightmare. She woke up sobbing, covered in sweat, with an extreme panic attack. It took Anya half an hour just to get her to breathe normal. She rocked her little sister back and forth until she stopped crying. She laid with Lexa and both fell asleep fast. 

Anya woke up first. Lexa laid in her arms, her arms firmly wrapped around her older sister. Anya shook her awake before heading downstairs to make everyone breakfast.  When the table was set, she woke the other children up. Together they ate breakfast and cleaned up. Thelonius hardly ever joined them for breakfast, cause he was dealing with a huge hangover every morning. Anya brought him a cup of coffee, water, aspirines and some breakfast. Then, it was time to head to school. 

 

Anya

Laura, Lexa and Wells came with Anya to say their goodbyes. Anya entered the bus and searched for a place to sit. She decided to sit in the front, alone. When almost everyone was on the bus, her teacher came to her, followed by a girl. “Hi Anya, this is Charlotte. Can she sit with you during the tour?” Her teacher asked. “Of course,” Anya lifted her bag from the seat next to her and Charlotte sat down with a smile on her face. “Hi, I’m Charlotte. I’m from Mr. Jackson’s class,” she introduced herself. “I’m Anya. Mrs. Wilde is my teacher,” Anya responded. They listened to what the teachers broadcasted and when they were finished, Anya and Charlotte both did their own thing. They didn’t talk much, sometimes asking each other unimportant questions. 

Charlotte noticed Anya kept staring at her phone with a concerned look on her face. “What’s wrong?” She asked. “Why do you keep staring at your phone?” “Oh, it’s nothing really. My siblings miss me. They kept texting but now they don’t respond anymore,” Anya said. “How many siblings do you have?” Charlotte asked curiously. “I have 3 brothers. Two are 4 years old and one is 9 years old. I have two sisters who are 8 and 9 years old. You?” Charlotte started a long story about her sister, Tris, who was 10 years old and did karate. Anya listened and pretended to be interested. To be honest, she didn’t care at all. Luckily, they arrived at their camping site. 

When Anya read who she would be sharing a tent with, she slammed her head against the wall. Of course she had to share a tent with no one other than Charlotte. The girl annoyed Anya already after a two hour bus drive. Spending two days with her would be worse than hell. She walked over to her tent and dropped her bag on a bed. The tent was just big enough for two people. Charlotte joined her soon and started talking about her favorite sports. Anya just nodded every few minutes but wasn’t paying attention at all. 

 

Lexa

Lexa was worried during the entire school day. What would happen when Anya wasn’t around to protect them. Anya was the strongest of them and she was the only one who could fight Thelonius off until everyone was in their bedroom. Now she wasn’t here and Lexa was afraid he might take ‘revenge’ for every time Anya had fought him off. When the class was finally allowed to leave, she rushed out of the classroom. Outside the school, she waited for Wells and Laura. 30 seconds later, she saw them almost running out of the building. She shared her concerns on the way back and they promised to stay together so they had a slightly bigger chance to fight him. 

That afternoon, Thelonius was so drunk he couldn’t even stand on his legs. The children locked themselves in the bedroom, happy that Thelonius wouldn’t hurt them. They hoped he would pass out soon so that they could grab dinner. After what felt like hours, they could finally grab dinner and something to drink. They took it upstairs and ate their dinner. After that, they watched Finding Nemo. Exhausted, they all fell asleep, cuddled up to each other. 

The next school day went the same for Laura, Wells and Lexa. Sick of worrying, they rushed out of the classroom as soon as the bell rang. Quickly, they picked up Aden and Sam from the neighbors and went inside. They made something to drink and ate some fruit. They all looked up surprised when they heard someone upstairs. A moment later, Thelonius walked down the stairs. The kids greeted him, trying to hide their astonishment. “Sir, are we allowed to go to Arkadia?” Laura asked politely. “Sure, be back at 5.30 PM, you have to cook dinner.” He replied wearily.  _ How the hell does he expect us to not burn anything if we have never learned how to cook.  _ Lexa thought. No one dared to say that out loud so they all just nodded. 

When they were at Arkadia, they dropped Aden and Sam at the daycare. There was always someone to watch the younger kids. Then, they made their way to the kitchen. Samira, the cook, looked at them surprised. “To what do I owe the pleasure?” She joked. “We need to learn how to cook a simple dish,” Wells explained. “We have to cook tonight.” “Oh I see. How about you guys help me make the pasta and I’ll give you enough to take home for dinner? She offered. They washed their hands and got started. Laura cut the onions and garlic, while Wells cut the bell pepper. Lexa was stirring in a pan while Samira put the ingredients in it. 

At 5.00 PM, the older children picked up Aden and Sam from daycare. “Anya,” Sam pouted. Aden looked like he was about to cry. “Anya will be back in two nights.” Lexa said quickly. “She will come back, she promised, remember?” Aden and Sam seemed to be okay with that for now. They walked home and set up the table. When Thelonius came down for dinner, he was surprised to see that nothing was burnt and there was real food on the table. They all sat down and started eating. 

About halfway through dinner, Thelonius stood up, looking angry around the table, and started screaming. “WHO DARED TO BUY DINNER FROM A RESTAURANT? THE MONEY ISN’T GROWING ON MY BACK.” “Sir, we didn’t buy it. The cook from Arkadia taught us how to make pasta and gave us dinner because we helped her cooking,” Lexa replied scared. “YOU WEREN’T EVEN ABLE TO COOK YOUR OWN DINNER! WHO DO YOU THINK THAT IS GOING TO DO FOR YOU EVERY DAY? CAN’T YOU DO ANYTHING?” He threw his plate on the ground, followed by a glass and another plate. “YOU AREN'T WORTH ANYTHING. YOU’RE ONLY GOOD FOR CLEANING SO THAT’S WHAT YOU ARE GOING TO DO.” WIthout saying a word, Lexa walked to the kitchen, grabbed cleaning stuff and cleaned everything up. Thelonius was just watching, still looking very angry. When Lexa finished cleaning, she turned to Thelonius. “I’m very sorry, sir. I’ll do better next time”, she almost pleaded. “Go to your room!” Was the only thing she got back. 

Lexa sat on her bed. She was waiting for the others to come upstairs. She was there for nearly 1,5 hours when Laura came upstairs. “What’s taking so long?” Lexa asked her. “Thelonius is having friends over tonight,” Laura replied. “I had to clean the whole living room with Aden, while Wells and Sam went to the store with Thelonius.” Laura looked peeled of. “You need a hand?” Lexa offered. “You’re not allowed to come downstairs,” Laura said. “I only came upstairs to grab something to do for Aden. I don’t know how Thelonius came up with the idea to let a 4 year old clean the living room, he was obviously drunk.” Lexa just nodded and Laura left the room. 

Lexa must have fallen asleep cause when she looked at the clock, two hours had passed. She heard screaming downstairs. She stood by the stairs, trying to hear what was said, but she couldn’t make out the exact words. Then, she heard Sam cry. She rushed downstairs and what she found there was cruel. Thelonius was hitting Sam with a beer bottle while his friends were laughing. When Thelonius saw Lexa, he let go of Sam and stumbled to her. She ran upstairs and locked their door. Thelonius hit the door with his whole body.  She grabbed Wells’ phone and dialed Anya’s number. 

 

Anya   
Anya was surprised she actually had a good time at the camping trip. At the company, they were assigned in pairs to shadow an employee. Of course she was paired up with Charlotte, but she was shy so she wasn’t talking that much. Anya and Charlotte shadowed a woman named Aruna. She was the assistant of one of the owners of the company. The whole day, she answered his phone calls, brought letters and papers to other employees and requested the presence of several employees in their boss’ office. She explained alot about how everything worked in the company and she showed them a part of their computer system. Anya found it really interesting and listened carefully to everything Aruna said. At the end of the day, they went back to the camping site. They ate dinner and after that, everyone was allowed to do whatever they wanted. Anya and Charlotte decided to work on their assignment they got with the trip. 

Anya was thinking about the question ‘What job did the person you shadowed do and would you want to have a job like that later?’ when her phone rang. She saw Wells’ name on the screen and answered it. 

Anya ran out of the tent, in the direction of the taxis. “Anya, where are you going?” Charlotte, who was following her, asked her. “My sister needs me, I have to go home,” Anya replied. Suddenly, she stopped, causing Charlotte to bump into her. “I don’t have enough money for a taxi,” she said panicking. “Charlotte stepped forward, payed the taxi and stepped in the car, pulling Anya in it too. “Where do you live?” She asked. Anya named the adress and the taxi driver drove them there. 

When they arrived, Anya ran out of the taxi, to her house. She opened the door and ran inside. She stopped in the hall, hearing screams and cries. “Charlotte, call the cops.” She ordered before opening the door. She smelled the alcohol before she saw it. On the couch, three men were watching, while the fourth one was touching Laura. Anya grabbed the closest thing near her and threw it at the man, before kicking him between his legs. She got hit on her head and fell on the ground. She saw Sam sitting under the table, another man trying to kick him. She quickly crawled to him and held him, using her own body as a shield to protect her brother. After a few minutes, she heard sirens outside. Police officers came inside and cuffed the four men downstairs. Anya quickly let Sam go and tried to run up the stairs. Halfway, she felt the dizziness and fell down. Then, everything turned black. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really sorry for the cliffhanger but otherwise it would be again, a very long chapter. Every chapter, I have one 'event' that will happen in the chapter and I work to that. Next chapter will be posted either be tonight or tomorrow.  
> I hope you enjoyed reading.  
> I've exchanged Sam and Aden's names sometimes. This is important for upcoming chapters. If you find a mistake, please let me know. 
> 
> 2538 words


	8. In the hospital

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two kids end up in the hospital. Anya's social worker comes by and lets Anya know she's looking for a new foster family for her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is corrected, thanks to my beta reader [soph_kom_trikru](http://archiveofourown.org/users/soph_kom_trikru)
> 
> I'm not a doctor so please don't jugde all the medical stuff in this chapter. I tried.  
> Enjoy reading.

“Out of the way! Now!” Four paramedics ran through the halls with two stretchers. They pushed the stretchers in two different rooms of the ER and called for a doctor. One was rushed into surgery, the other one was taken upstairs to do some scans. The five other children who came with them, were led into a private room. Soon a police officer joined them and asked them what happened. Neither of them answered. 

 

Anya (the morning after)   
When she woke up, Anya felt a sharp pain in her side. She traced her skin with her hand and felt a bandage. She opened her eyes and tried to see something but the light was too bright. Exhausted, she fell back in the pillow. She felt someone checking her bandage before speaking to her. “Hello Anya. I’m Dr. Torres, head of orthopedic surgery. You have broken two ribs, one of them had punctured your lung. We were able to fix everything but you have to be very careful with moving for at least two weeks. for the time being, you have to stay in the hospital. Your siblings and teacher are here in the hospital, do you want them to come visit you?” Anya had a hard time speaking so she just nodded. Dr Torres left the room.

 

Wells (the evening before)

The four siblings and Charlotte were brought to a private room. Doctors and nurses walked in and out of the room, checking everyone’s injuries. Suddenly, someone started screaming. Wells moved to the sound and saw Lexa sitting on the ground, her head resting on her knees, her arms wrapped around herself. Wells sat down next to her and laid his hand on her arm. She flinched and he quickly pulled his arm back. “Lexa, it’s okay. You’re safe. No one’s going to hurt you. I promise.” He tried to calm her down. “Maybe you should just give her some space,” Laura suggested. Wells returned to the bed he sat on before. He had no idea how to help his sister. He felt useless. After a few minutes, Lexa stopped screaming. 

Half an hour later, Mrs Wilde came in, followed by Mr Jackson. When he spotted Charlotte, Mr Jackson quickly walked over to her. “What’s going on here?” He asked. “You can’t just disappear, Charlotte. We were so worried. Something bad could have happened to you.” Charlotte started to cry. Mr Jackson’s anger was replaced by compassion. He laid an arm around her shoulders and comforted her. “What happened? Where’s Anya?” Mrs Wilde asked. No one knew what to say.  _ Should they tell the truth? But then they would probably be separated. Should they lie? But then they would have to stay with Thelonius. It could get worse than this.  _ Finally, Wells decided to tell the truth.

“My father abuses us,” He started. “It wasn’t always that bad but lately, he has been drinking more and more and the abuse got worse.” Then he explained what happened that night. 

 

_ He wanted us to cook dinner but no one ever taught us how to cook so we asked the cook from Arkadia for help. She taught us to cook pasta and gave us some to take home for dinner because we had helped her. We went home, set up the table and called Thelonius for dinner. He was pleased but halfway through dinner, he noticed the plastic bags we used to carry the food home. He got mad because he thought we had bought dinner instead of cooking. He threw his plate on the ground and started yelling at Lexa. He said she was useless and things like that. She cleaned up his mess and had to stay upstairs for the rest of the night.  _

_ When she was upstairs, he made an announcement. His friends were coming over and we had to clean the living room and go to the store before they were here. Aden and Laura had to clean while Sam, Thelonius and I went to the store. In the store, Thelonius bought lots of beer and vodka. I was concerned about what might happen but I was afraid to go against him so I kept my mouth shut.  _

_ When we got back home, Laura had cleaned the whole living room. We always have to go upstairs if we don’t have any chores to do downstairs so we walked to the stairs but he ordered us to sit on the couch. We sat down and he started a speech about our behaviour and what we were supposed to do when his friends were there. We had to bring drinks and snacks and stuff.  _

_ When they arrived, we all were on our best behaviour. Aden and Sam were playing on their carpet and Laura and I had prepared food and drinks. Lexa was still upstairs. They got drunk really fast and started making stupid jokes. Sam wanted something to drink but Laura and I were busy and Thelonius didn’t pay attention to him. He climbed on the countertop and tried to open the fridge but he fell and started to cry really hard. Thelonius got mad at him and started hitting him with a beer bottle. Lexa heard him screaming and ran down the stairs. When Thelonius saw her, he let go of Sam and came after her.  _

_ I grabbed Aden and hid him in the cupboard under the stairs. When I came back, I saw one of the men touch Laura. Before I could do anything, Anya rushed inside and attacked him. There was a huge fight and Anya tried to run upstairs to Lexa but she was so dizzy she fell down the stairs. The police came and Thelonius and his friends were arrested. We were brought here right away.  _

 

Mrs Wilde and Mr Jackson both had a shocked look on their face. “H-how long has this been going on?” Mrs Wilde asked, afraid of the answer. “I don’t know exactly when it started, but it was before Anya joined your class.” Mrs Wilde was shocked by the answer. “Where’s Anya now?” “Last I heard, she was rushed into surgery. I don’t know where she is but when we can visit her, a doctor will come get us.” They sat down and waited for a doctor to come get them. 

That evening, they were allowed to see Anya, but she was still asleep. Wells was shocked by what he saw. Anya was really pale and there were lots of machines standing around her bed, connected with her body. The only sound in the room came from the heart monitor, which was beeping steady. One by one, they gave Anya a kiss. They left the room in silence. 

 

Anya   
Dr Torres came back, followed by Wells, Lexa, Laura, Aden, Charlotte, Mr Jackson and Mrs Wilde. They all looked concerned. “Your family visited you last night, but you were still unconscious,” the doctor explained. They all came closer to the bed and sat beside her. Lexa was the only one still standing by the door. Wells bended over to Anya and whispered in her ear. “I don’t know what happened upstairs, but Lexa is definitely not okay. She hasn’t spoke a single word. I think you should just give her some time.” Anya nodded and looked around her. “Where’s Sam?” She asked. Suddenly, the children in the room looked very sad. Laura was the first one to break the silence. “He was brought in at the same time as you. You were rushed into surgery while a doctor took him to another floor to make some scans. He had lots of injuries in his stomach and the last thing the doctors told us was that they had tried to performed surgery on him but his body was too tired. They keep him in the ICU until they can try surgery again.” “Why is no one with him?” Anya asked concerned. “We’re not allowed to see him,” Wells answered her question. “You should get some rest.” Anya looked surprised at her teacher. “Why... H-how”- “Sleep! We can talk later,” she was cut off by Mrs Wilde. She closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep. 

All the kids except for Sam and Anya were allowed to go home. Temporarily, they lived with Mrs Wilde. Anya and Charlotte had explained to their teachers what happened and Mrs Wilde had apologised a hundred times because she didn’t notice what was happening with Anya. For the time being, the kids were safe. Anya was recovering quickly and she could talk much better. 

There were two things that were very concerning. Sam was still in the ICU. He hadn’t woken up and his body wasn’t strong enough to survive surgery. The doctors said they had to be patient but Anya was worried sick about him. And then there was Lexa. She hadn’t said a single word since ‘that night’ and she started screaming whenever someone came too close to her. She spent most of her time in Anya’s room in the hospital. The doctors even placed a bed for her so she could stay the night. Anya knew her sister needed time, but she had a feeling more had happened with Thelonius than everyone knew. 

‘That night’, the police officers had found Lexa in her bedroom, curled up under her bed with her teddy bear clamped between her arms. When the female officer tried to get her out of there, she started screaming. In the end, Laura suggested they gave her some space. She told Lexa that if she wanted to see her sister, she had to come with them. That had the desired effect. 

The investigation was still ongoing. The children had to give their statements and the police had pictures of their injuries. It was obvious those injuries were caused by an adult. The only thing keeping the five men from prison was the procedures. There were a lot of them. The police department’s lawyer was busy with building a case. In the meantime, Thelonius and his friends were kept in jail, because they didn’t have anyone to bail them out. 

About a week after the incident, Wells walked into Anya’s room with a sad look on his face. Anya could see he had cried, his eyes were red and she could still see tears in his eyes. “Sam didn’t make it. His body was too tired, he just gave up.” Wells started to cry again. Anya cried too. He was just so young, he didn’t deserve to die.  _ Maybe it’s better this way. He won’t have to worry about new foster parents who might hurt him anymore. He won’t be in pain ever again.  _ Anya’s thoughts were fighting with each other. She thought about the last time she read him a bedtime story. He looked so carefree. Like Anya was his sister and he had a normal family. Anya cried herself to sleep, rubbing circles on Wells’ back, trying to comfort him. 

The following morning, Anya had just finished breakfast when her social worker walked in. “Hello Gina,” Anya greeted the woman. Behind her stood another woman. “Anya, this is your new social worker, Clea Hopkins.” She introduced the woman behind her. “I have to go now, good luck in your life and whatever.” She quickly turned around and left. “Hi,” Clea greeted the girl. Anya looked at her silently. “I am here to discuss how to proceed,” Clea continued. “And how do you want to proceed?” Anya asked. “What will happen to me and my siblings once everyone is healed?” “I’m here to discuss that with you, Anya. My boss has already decided that we’re going to try to find a foster family that wants to have both you and Lexa. She’s having a rough time and she seems to trust you. You will be separated from your other siblings but we’ll find a good home for them too.” “Just like Thelonius was such a good home for them,” Anya said skeptically. “It was a mistake and it won’t happen again,” Clea reassured her. “Besides, Gina had arranged that foster home. I work slightly different than her.” “I’ll give you a chance. Don’t screw this up.” With that, Anya turned around and acted like she was about to fall asleep. Clea left the room, determined to find this girl and her sister a good home. 

Five minutes after Clea left, Lexa entered the room. She sat down on the chair besides Anya’s bed and stared to the ground. “Hi Lex. How are you and the others?” Anya asked. Lexa didn’t make a sound. “I have a new social worker. She came to meet me today. She told me they’re trying to find a family who wants two kids so we can stay together. Lexa nodded slowly, then looked at Anya and smiled. Anya smiled back and they sat together in silence. 

Two days later, Clea came to visit Anya again. Lexa was there too and refused to leave the room. “Okay girls, Clea started, I have good news. Mrs Wilde wants to foster both of you. Unfortunately, it’s impossible for her to foster your siblings too so we’re still searching for another foster home for them.” Clea looked at them happily. Anya and Lexa looked at each other, then Anya spoke. “And that took you two whole days? When do we leave?” Clea’s smiled faded. “You can leave when the doctor tells you so. And yes, it took me two whole days. Usually it takes two weeks to go to the procedure for a new foster home. Be happy I worked so hard for you.” Thank you Clea, we are grateful forever for you,” Anya said sarcastically. Clea turned around and left the room with a simple ‘bye’. 

After spending two weeks in the hospital, Anya was finally allowed to leave. She looked forward to leave the four white walls which prisoned her for the last two weeks, but she was worried about her new foster home. Lexa was really nervous and she wasn’t sure Mrs Wilde would be able to deal with them. Sighing, she walked out of her room, followed by Lexa. Outside the hospital, Mrs Wilde was waiting for them. “You’re ready, Girls?” She asked. The sisters nodded. “Let’s go home.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the hits, comments and kudos. I'm so happy people like this story and let me know.  
> I hope you enjoyed reading. 
> 
> Today we bought a piano!!! I'm so happy. When the new school year starts, I'll be starting with piano lessons and I'm so excited about it. 
> 
> 2383


	9. The Jordan family

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anya and Lexa live with Mrs Wilde and her family but things don't go so easy. Lexa and Anya go back to school.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is corrected, thanks to my beta reader [soph_kom_trikru](http://archiveofourown.org/users/soph_kom_trikru)
> 
> It's a bit hard to write this chapter and with who's POV it is. Lexa doesn't talk so Anya does all the talking but some parts are written from Lexa's POV. I've written it above the paragraph, I hope it's clear.

When they entered Mrs Wilde’s house, they were surprised to find a boy there who seemed to be Lexa’s age. “This is my son, Jasper. He’s 9 years old.” Mrs Wilde introduced him. “And this is my husband, Daniel.” Father and son greeted the girls. “Come on in! I’ll show you your room, Daniel said.” Anya and Lexa followed him up the stairs, to their room. “I’m sorry but we only have one room so you have to share. I hope it’s not a problem,” Daniel apologised. “Not at all, thank you,” Anya replied politely while Lexa just stared to the ground.

After they dropped their bags on their beds, they went back downstairs. “Mrs Wilde, may I use the toilet, please?” Anya asked her teacher. “Of course Anya, I’ll show you where it is.” Anya followed her teacher to the hall. 

While Anya was gone, the family tried to make a conversation with Lexa but the girl stayed silent and kept staring at the ground. She was fiddling with her sleeves, obviously a nervous habit. “Maybe we should give her some time,” Mrs Wilde advised her family. Lexa stared at Jasper’s birth card. ‘Jasper Jamie Jordan’ It read.  _ Jordan?  _ Lexa looked questioningly at the card.  “Our family name is Jordan, but at school I use my maiden name, which is why Anya knows me as Mrs Wilde.” Lexa nodded, happy her unspoken question was answered. 

When Anya got back, everyone sat down on the couch. “We thought it might be a good idea to talk,” Mrs Wilde began. “We want to get to know you and talk about rules and stuff.” “Yeah, that’s okay. What do you want to know, Mrs Wilde?” “First of all, outside of class, you can call me Camille. No need to be so formal.” “Okay Camille, Anya answered simply.” 

They had a long talk about what to expect from each other and simple things like what’s your favorite dish. After one and a half hours, Lexa started squealing. “Is it okay if I take her upstairs and give her something to do? I’ll come back to talk further,” Anya asked. Daniel and Camille nodded and Anya left with Lexa. Upstairs, she gave her phone to Lexa and asked her if it was okay if she went back downstairs. Lexa seemed comfortable so Anya left her alone in their room.

When she returned downstairs, she heard Jasper asking his father why the weird girl didn’t speak. “I don’t want you to call her weird, Jas, she’s just scared. She doesn’t have a mommy and daddy like you,” Daniel replied. Anya walked in, looking slightly uncomfortable. Daniel shot her an apologetic smile. They continued their conversation. Halfway, Jasper decided to ask Anya why her sister didn’t talk. 

“Anya, why doesn’t your sister talk?” “I’m not sure, to be honest.” Anya thinks for a moment before she continues. “Her parents abandoned her when she was young. She got a new father but he wasn’t a friendly father. He hurt her and said very mean things to her. He made her really scared. I think she just needs time to get used to a new family but eventually, she will open up to you. She’s a really sweet kid and she would love to play soccer with you.” Anya had noticed the little soccer shoes and trophies. She assumed Jasper was a big soccer fan. 

Jasper looked excited to hear Lexa would want to play soccer with him. They talked further about other things but didn’t speak about Lexa. 

At 6.30 PM exactly, Lexa came downstairs, hoping there was food. Camille was cooking dinner, while Anya was playing on the Wii with Jasper and Daniel. “Hi lex, come join us,” Anya said, happy to see her sister. Lexa sat down on the end of the couch, far away from the others. “Dinner is almost ready,” Anya answered her unspoken question. Lexa just nodded and focused on the screen. 

“Dinner was lovely,” Anya complimented Camille. Lexa was still eating, slowly chewing her food. “Lexa, if you don’t want to eat anymore you can put your plate on the kitchen counter,” Camille said to her. Everyone sat down on the couch, while Lexa was still eating at the dining table. After fifteen minutes, her plate was empty. She walked to the kitchen to clean up.

The Jordan family and Anya made their way over to the kitchen when they heard Lexa screaming. Anya understood right away what was wrong with her sister. Lexa’s plate laid on the ground in thousand pieces. Camille took Jasper back to the living room while Daniel cleaned up the pieces. “Is she okay?” Daniel asked Anya. “I think so, she’s just scared cause our former foster dad always got mad when we made noise. Our brother dropped a mug once and our foster dad got crazy. She just needs time.” Daniel nodded and left to give the girls some privacy. 

 

Lexa’s POV _  
_ _ They’re going to hurt you. Run while you still can. They’re not any different than other foster parents. You broke their stuff, they’ll punish you.  _ The voices in Lexa’s head went crazy. She laid on the ground, trembling, curled up to a ball. She was crying and screaming, trying to scare off the people who would come to hurt her. “Lex, you’re safe. They’re not mad. You’re okay. No one’s going to hurt you.” She could hear Anya’s voice but it wasn’t as comforting as it was before. Anya wasn’t there when Thelonius got crazy. She didn’t protect Lexa from the monsters like she promised. She was scared that he’d come after her. Hurting her again. 

When the monsters weren’t there half an hour later, Lexa stopped screaming. Maybe they would let it go unpunished this time. She got up and ran upstairs. When she let herself fall down on the bed, she noticed that Anya had followed her. “Lex, are you okay?” Lexa just nodded and grabbed her book. She continued reading her story while Anya kept staring at her worriedly.   
Around bedtime, Camille knocked on the door. “Hi, can I come in?” “Of course,” Anya replied. “I know you’ve been through a lot and I just wanted to let you know you can take as much time as you need.” She looked at both Anya and Lexa before she continued. “Tomorrow, I have to go back to school but Daniel works at home. If you want to go to school then that’s okay but we understand it if you need more time.” Anya thought for a moment, then made a decision. “I think we both need some time to adjust to the situation and to prepare for being under other people.” Camille nodded. She and Anya talked for awhile before Lexa interrupted. 

Lexa pushed her sketchbook in Camille’s hands and looked at her questioningly. Camille looked at the sketch. Lexa had drawn three people, two boys and one girl. Above their heads, their names were written. Aden, Laura and Wells. Next to the people on the sketch, a big question mark was drawn. Camille understood what Lexa meant. “I don’t know where they are, but I do know all of them have a new home. They are transferred to another school, I’m sorry.” Disappointed, Lexa turned back to her book. “Good night girls.” Camille turned around and Left their room. “Good night, Camille,” Anya replied. 

The following morning, Anya and Lexa walked downstairs for breakfast. “Good morning, girls,” Daniel greeted them cheerfully. “Good morning, Daniel,” Anya replied for both of them. “What do you want for breakfast?” He asked them. “I can make anything for you. French toast, waffles, eggs, bacon, pancakes?” “French toast for both of us please.” Anya looked at Lexa for confirmation. Her little sister just nodded. 

10 minutes later, Anya and Lexa received a plate with french toast. “If you want more, let me know,” Daniel told them. Anya and Lexa ate their breakfast in silence. They declined when Daniel offered them more, but accepted the apple juice. “What are your plans for today?”   
Daniel tried to make conversation. “I thought it might be fun to see if there was a soccer field around to play.” Anya told him. Daniel smiled. “Jasper loves to play soccer too. Maybe we could play together when he’s back from school?” “Yeah, we’d love to, right Lex?” Lexa just nodded while staring at her plate. Daniel went back to his office, while Anya and Lexa went outside with the soccer ball.

That afternoon, Jasper came back from school. Camille had to stay longer but would be home before dinner. Jasper ran happily to the sisters. “Do you want to play soccer with me and my dad?” He asked excited. “Sure”, Anya answered before Lexa could protest. They played a game, Jasper and Daniel against Anya and Lexa. Jasper didn’t know if he was allowed to steal the ball from Lexa, since she was afraid to be touched. Luckily, the problem was solved when he had the ball and Lexa stole the ball from him, touching his shoulder with hers in the process. A lot more confident, Jasper continued the game. Anya and Lexa were way better and beat the boys with 13-7.

 

Lexa’s POV  
The following Monday, Lexa and Anya returned to school. Lexa was terrified to go back.  _ What if he would escape prison and come after her. He definitely knows where she goes to school.  _ Thelonius and his friends were still waiting in prison for their trial. Luckily, the children didn’t have to be in court with him. They were allowed to give a video statement about their time with Thelonius and about ‘that night’. 

Camille had offered them a ride to school, since she had to be there too. In the car, Lexa suddenly grabbed Anya’s hand and squeezed softly. Anya squeezed back and they held hands the rest of the ride. When they stopped in the school’s parking lot, Lexa was trembling violently. “It’s going to be okay, Lex. They don’t know about what happened and you don’t have to tell your classmates about it if you don’t want to. Your teacher knows about it and informed the class about the little things like no touching. You’ll be fine and if not, I’m in the building next to you.” Anya tried to comfort her sister. Lexa nodded and let go of her sister’s hand. Hesitantly, she entered the building. Anya walked further with Camille, on their way to their class. 

Lexa walked nervously into the classroom. She walked to her seat and tried to ignore the prying eyes. “Okay class,” her teacher started, “we all have seen that Lexa is back at school. Lexa, welcome back to school. I hope you feel better. Class, let’s not make this awkward for Lexa…..”  _ Like you just didn’t do that.  _ Lexa stopped listening after that. 

The teacher explained what they had to do and Lexa went to work. When she was almost done, her teacher sat down beside her. “I know you have to catch up with a lot of work Lexa, but you don’t have to worry. You’re really smart and a very good student. I have an idea to make it easier for you but I’d like to talk to you and your parents to explain. Can we set up a meeting with your parents for as soon as possible?” “I don’t have parents,” Lexa wrote in her notebook. “You know who I mean, Lexa. The people who you live with right now. Your foster parents. Can we set up a meeting with them.” Lexa nodded and wrote something in her notebook. “You can call them or write them a letter and give it to me.” “I’ll give them a call after school and they’ll let you know when we’ll meet. 

 

Camille and Daniel made an appointment with Lexa’s teacher for the next day after school. While everyone was hurrying to get out of class, Lexa stayed seated, waiting for her foster parents. They arrived right on time. 

“Good afternoon, Mr and Mrs Jordan.” Lexa’s teacher greeted them. “Good afternoon, Mrs Smith.” Camille and Daniel responded politely. “I invited you here to talk about Lexa and her progress at school. She’s a great student, really smart and always working hard. She has to catch up with lots of work and I think we should make it easier for her.” “What did you have in mind,” Camille asked. We want to make everything as easy as possible but she can’t just skip so much work.” “I understand your point of view, which is why I have a better solution.” Mrs Smith started to explain her plan. 

“In class, I want her to participate with the rest of her classmates. She won’t have to do any extra work. After school she can stay for like an hour extra. In that extra time, I’ll give her summaries and exercises. When she understands it, we move on to the next subject. If she needs more time, she can get that. I’ll be here to help her of course. If necessary, she can stay longer or she can continue at home. She always works so hard, I have no doubt she’ll be finished with the extra work before the end of the year.”

“What if she can’t do it? We know she is smart but maybe it’s just too much for her. She’s just a kid and she needs time to cope with what has happened to her,” Daniel said. “What if she can’t catch up with it and it’ll be too late to try something else?” Mrs Smith told him about how good I was and how hard I worked. 

Lexa knew Daniel didn’t mean it in a bad way but she couldn’t help feeling as if she wasn’t smart enough. Not good enough for them. Silently, she started to cry. Camille was the first one to notice it. “Lexa, what’s wrong?” She asked concerned. Lexa stood up and left the room. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone,  
> thank you so much for all the hits, kudos and comments. I hope you enjoyed reading.  
> My beta reader can't help me for a week (starting tomorrow) so the following chapters probably have more mistakes in it. I'm sorry, my English is just not so good. 
> 
> 2341 words


	10. Who's the one to blame?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daniel and Camille have a hard time interacting with Lexa, which results in an angry Anya

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've changed the end of the chapter cause when I read it again, it wasn't very realistic. Niylah will come back in the story but right now, it just didn't make sense. So if you've read the chapter yesterday(26 August) I advise you to read the end again to prevent confusion. 
> 
> My beta reader is not available to correct the chapter so sorry for the mistakes.   
> Enjoy reading

Anya was doing her homework when Lexa stormed into the room, crying. Her sister laid down on her bed and Anya sat down beside her. “Lex, what happened? What’s wrong?” Anya asked a little panicked. Lexa just curled up to a ball and continued crying. Anya wanted to wrap her arms around her sister, make her feel safe, but she knew Lexa would only get more upset if she did that. Instead, she just kept talking to her, hoping her voice would calm her down. 

Fifteen minutes later, Camille and Daniel rushed into the room. “Is she okay? Did she tell you what’s wrong? Is she hurt? Can we do anything for her?”  Anya was flooded with questions. Angry, Anya grabbed both of their hands and dragged them downstairs. 

“You know she gets anxious with so many people around her and so much noise. Did you really have to storm into there and make her more upset?” Anya was angry at them for making her sister upset in the first place and making it worse by invading her space. “Sorry, we’re just worried about her,” Daniel apologised. “I know, but you’re dealing with her the wrong way. You have to be patient with her and make her comfortable. Even before the incident with Thelonius she was often uncomfortable with people.” Anya wanted to say ‘when she was little’ but no one knew that Lexa was Alexander Woods or that they were biological siblings and they wanted to keep it that way. After Camille and Daniel had promised they would try to be more calm around Lexa and not upset her, Anya went upstairs to check on Lexa. 

Upstairs, Anya was surprised to find a letter on her bed. She looked questioningly at Lexa, who nodded when Anya asked if it the letter came from her. Anya started reading

 

_ My teacher, Mrs Smith, wanted to talk to Mr and Mrs Jordan. She wants to tutor me after school so I can catch up with the missing work. It was a good idea I think but Daniel thinks I won’t be able to do that. I should stay an hour after school, maybe more if necessary or I have to work more at home. It felt like I wasn’t good enough for them, even though I have almost perfect grades and I was further than the rest of the class before, you know. Mrs Smith thinks I can do it and she defended me but Daniel obviously thinks I’m a lost cause and Camille didn’t even say anything. I don’t want to disappoint them. I don’t want to screw this up.  _

 

Anya could see traces of tears on the letter. “Lex, you won’t disappoint them. I think Daniel is just concerned cause he wants you to be able to do more than just school work. He wants you to play and to do things you like after school, not only extra school work.” Lexa shrugged and continued reading her book. “Why don’t we go downstairs and talk to them?” Anya suggested. Lexa put her book away and nodded. Together, they headed downstairs.

“Lexa told me what happened,” Anya started the conversation with Daniel and Camille. “Daniel, can you explain why you doubt Lexa can handle her schoolwork the way her teacher proposed?” “I think it might be too much for her. She’s been through a lot and she needs time to be a child. She shouldn’t spend all her time on school work,” Daniel said. “Okay, I understand you don’t mean it in a bad way but Lexa feels like you think she’s not good enough.” “It was never our intention to let Lexa think that,” Camille said. “Well, why didn’t you just ask Lexa if she wanted it? Cause Lexa is the one who knows best if she can do this or not.” Anya looked challenging at them. “Good point, Anya. Lexa, do you think you can handle catching up with your school work the way Mrs Smith proposed?” Daniel asked the younger sister. Lexa nodded in response. “Do you want to do it that way?” Camille asked her. Lexa nodded again. “Okay, then we’ll try it. If it doesn’t work out, please tell us or Mrs Smith. We can always find another way.” Camille gave Lexa an encouraging smile. 

Jasper ran into the house with his soccer ball. He spend his afternoon at his friend’s house playing video games. “Lexa, Anya, do you want to play soccer with me?” He asked, jumping enthusiastically up and down. “Sure, we’ll play with you. Is your dad coming too?” Anya asked. “I’ll go ask him.” Jasper ran through the house, looking for his father. Five minutes later, the four of them headed to the soccer field. 

“Anya, do you think Lexa can teach me some of her tricks?” Jasper had a habit of asking everything to Anya cause Lexa never responded. “You can ask it to Lexa, Jasper, she won’t bite.” Anya joked. Hesitantly, Jasper walked over to Lexa, who was doing tricks with the bal a little further away. “Lexa, can you teach me some of your tricks?” Lexa nodded and looked at her sister questioningly. Anya and Daniel joined them. Lexa showed the tricks in slow motion while Anya explained how to do them and what to watch out for. Soon, Jasper and Daniel could do very cool tricks. 

After practising Lexa’s tricks, Jasper wanted to try them out in a match so they played against each other. Lexa and Jasper against Anya and Daniel. Daniel was a good goalkeeper because he was so big, but had lots of opportunities to score, which she did. Jasper tried lots of tricks and to his surprise, he could win more duels than before. After two hours on the field, they went back for dinner. 

For a week, everything in the Jordan house went well. But the night before her birthday, Lexa had a terrible nightmare.

Anya was downstairs, working on Lexa’s birthday present when she heard her sister screaming upstairs. She rushed to their bedroom. Lexa sat in the corner of their room, curled up to a ball, crying and trembling violently. Daniel stood by her bed, Camille sat with Lexa,  trying to calm her down. “OUT! NOW!” Anya commanded them angrily. Daniel and Camille did what was told them and walked out of the room, waiting at the threshold. 

“Lexi, you’re safe. No one’s going to hurt you. Just breathe.” Anya tried to calm her sister down, but nothing she did helped. Lexa was heartbreakingly crying. She wrapped her arms around her older sister and buried her face in Anya’s neck. Surprised, Anya held her, happy her sister felt safe with her. Anya remembered something she read on the internet that could help with panic attacks and decided to try it.  

“Lex, I need you to do something for me, okay? Can you name three things you can feel? You don’t have to do it out loud.” Lexa nodded and five minutes later, she looked at Anya questioningly, waiting for new instructions. Do that with all your senses now. So three things you smell, hear and see. Lexa nodded and focused on her mission. 

Half an hour later, Lexa was calm enough to let Anya lead her to the bed and lay down. She didn’t let go of Anya’s hand so Anya was forced to sit next to her sister. “I want to talk with Daniel and Camille, okay Lex? I’ll be back soon, I promise.” Lexa nodded and let go of her hand. She grabbed Anya’s pillow and held it firmly. Anya headed downstairs. 

In the living room, Camille and Daniel sat on the couch with Jasper. He woke up from Lexa’s screaming and came to see what happened. “What the hell happened up there?” Anya asked, pissed at them cause they made her sister uncomfortable again. “I went to the bathroom and heard noise coming from your room. I went to check on you and saw Lexa was having a nightmare,” Camille explained. “I woke Daniel and we tried to wake her up. She was going crazy, it wasn’t our fault. We just tried to calm her down. We’re her parents now, that’s what we’re supposed to do, right?”    
Anya sighed frustrated. “You don’t know her. You don’t know how to help her. You only make her more upset. How can you be a parent if you don’t know anything about you child and can’t handle her?” “We’re doing our very best, Anya.” Daniel looked angry. “Just because she doesn’t try with us doesn’t mean we’re bad parents. We’re trying but she makes it impossible.” Right after he said that, Daniel regretted it. WIth a painful look on her face, Anya went upstairs. 

“Lex, we’re getting out of here. Those people are crazy. They don’t want us, just like everyone else.” Anya started to put their stuff in their backpacks. Lexa started to cry. 

_ I screwed up again. Anya could’ve been happy here, with them and I ruined it for her. Why do I always have to be so scared. Why can’t I just be normal?  _

Lost in her thoughts, Lexa didn’t notice that she was having another panic attack. Anya repeated the actions of the night before. When Lexa had calmed down, Anya continued packing. They heard someone walking up the stairs, through the hall, to their bedroom. 

“Can I come in?” Daniel asked. “It’s your house, you don’t have to ask. Don’t worry, we’ll be out of here soon.” Anya snapped. “I didn’t mean what I said,” Daniel said. “It isn’t Lexa’s fault things go wrong. Camille and I, we just have a lot to learn. We’ve never been through the things you’ve been through. You keep saying Lexa needs time but maybe we need time too. Time to adjust to the situation. We’re really trying, Anya.” 

Camille stood in the doorway, listening to her husband’s apologies. “We really want you to stay. We want to make this work.” Camille gave them an encouraging look. “What if this happens again? Will Lexa be blamed again?” Anya asked skeptically. “No, we know we’re the ones to blame too. We will do our very best to prevent these incidents.” Daniel said confidently. Anya stared at the bag in her hands, thinking about what she should do. Lexa shook her arm and pushed a letter in her hands. 

_ I don’t want to leave. I don’t want to end up in another foster home like Thelonius’ one. Please, you could be happy here. I didn’t mean to screw this up for you. I’m sorry. _

Anya looked at her sister with tears in her eyes. “Don’t be sorry, Lex. It isn’t your fault. You didn’t screw up. I love you.” The sisters wrapped their arms around each other. 

“We won’t leave. You can go back to bed.” Camille and Daniel nodded and left the room. They brought Jasper to bed and wished him ‘good night’ before heading to their own bed and falling asleep in seconds. 

The next morning, Camille and Daniel made a big breakfast for everyone. They sat at the dining table with the five of them. “Anya, why was Lexa screaming last night?” Jasper asked her suddenly. Anya gave her sister an uncertain look. Lexa nodded at her and Anya started to explain. 

“Today, it’s Lexa’s birthday, but she doesn’t want to celebrate it. The last time she celebrated her birthday was when she was 6. She celebrated it with her mother but since she died, Lexa hasn’t celebrated it. In foster families, most people don’t care about birthdays and Lexa has a few bad memories from her birthdays.” 

Jasper nodded and continued eating breakfast. “We can do something for your birthday if you want, Lexa.” Camille looked at her. Without looking up, Lexa shook her head. No one talked about it further. 

Since it was sunday, Anya, Lexa and Jasper didn’t have school. They decided to go to the soccer field and practise a bit. Lexa and Anya taught Jasper how to shoot the ball really hard and Lexa taught him a few new tricks. After more than an hour playing soccer, they returned home.

When they entered the house, Camille and Daniel were singing Happy birthday. They had bought a birthday cake and had decorated the whole house. As soon as Lexa saw the brightly coloured balloons, she ran outside. Again, Anya was angry at Camille and Daniel.

“I understand you wanted to do something nice for Lexa, but next time someone tells you something, make sure you listen to it.” 

“What did we do wrong this time?” Camille asked. “We’re spending our time and money on Lexa and you and all we get back is ungratefulness.” “I TOLD YOU LEXA DOESN’T WANT TO CELEBRATE HER BIRTHDAY. SHE HAS A DAMN GOOD REASON FOR THAT. INSTEAD OF DOING WHAT YOU WANT, MAYBE YOU COULD HAVE RESPECT HER WISHES” 

Jasper started to cry. “Stop screaming Anya, I don’t want you to be mad.” Jasper looked really sad. “I’m going to look for my sister.” She turned around and left. 

**Lexa** kept running and running until she fell down from lack of oxygen. She saw the sign from the train station. With the little amount of money she had, she bought a train ticket. Exhausted, she sat in the train, waiting for her destination. 

**Anya** had been searching Lexa for hours. She had walked the whole neighborhood twice and still, no sign of her sister.  _ Where would Lexa go if she was upset? Who would she go to?  _ Suddenly, Anya knew where Lexa was headed. She bought a train ticket and stepped on the train. 

Lexa

“I miss you so much. I wish I could be with you. I’m screwing everything up. I’m just so scared. Everything is just too much mum, I can’t handle it anymore.” Lexa cried heartbreakingly. Suddenly, she felt a hand on her shoulder. She looked up and saw a woman looking at her. Quickly, she backed away from the woman’s touch. “Are you alright? Where are your parents?” The woman asked. 

Anya

Anya ran to the cemetery. She froze when she saw her sister. Lexa sat next to Arizona’s tombstone. Woman stood next to her with her hand on Lexa’s shoulder. “Lexa!” Anya ran to her sister. She saw Lexa moving away from the woman. “Are you okay?” she asked her sister. Lexa stood up and hid behind her sister, looking at the woman. “Where are your parents, honey?” The woman looked now at Anya. “It’s okay, I’m her sister. We’re going home now.” “I’m sorry but I think it’s very irresponsible to let her go with you. She’s obviously upset and the things she just said worry me,” the woman said. “You don’t have the right to stop me from taking my sister home,” Anya snapped. Anya grabbed Lexa’s hand and walked away. To her surprise, Lexa didn’t pull her hand away or flinched. Instead, she squeezed her sister’s hand lightly. 

They took the train home and walked the last part of the way home. Anya opened the door with her key and they walked into the house. They hung up their coats and walked to the living room.   
As soon as she saw the Jordan family, Lexa started to cry. She grabbed her sister’s hand firmly and started to tremble violently. Next to Camille, Daniel and Jasper sat another person. “We’re really sorry girls,” Daniel said. There, on the couch, sat Clea Hopkins. “We really tried,” Camille tried to justify it, “We just can’t do this anymore. We have to think about Jasper too.”  

Crying, Anya and Lexa walked upstairs to pack their bags. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all the support, kudos, comments and hits. It makes me very happy that people enjoy the story. I'll post the next chapter ASAP but I'm not sure I'll be able to post chapter 11 today (27 August)
> 
> Our piano will be delivered tomorrow!!! I'm really excited :-))
> 
> 2621 words


	11. Where to go now?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clea is searching for a new foster home for the girls but that's not very easy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really wanted to write something for you guys but I've been busy today. I hope you enjoy reading. It's not a very interesting chapter. Any ideas, suggestions, feedback? Let me know
> 
> Sorry for any mistakes, I need my beta reader back. :-(

Sighing, Anya cleaned the dishes and put them where they belonged.. Lexa was doing her homework and Mrs Sarah was watching TV. They were living with Mrs Sarah for a month now. It wasn’t that bad but it wasn’t home either. Mrs Sarah was a 76 years old woman who lived on her own with two cats. She wanted Anya and Lexa to call her Mrs Sarah, so they did. She wasn’t very active. Every morning, she went out of her apartment to go to the cafe on the other side of the street. She would drink a cup of coffee and talk with old people about ‘old people’s business’ as she called it. 

Since Lexa and Anya lived in another neighborhood than before, they went to another school. It was a good thing, though. They both couldn’t deal with seeing Camille again. After they sent the girls away, Anya went back one more time. She wrote them a letter and put it in the mailbox. 

When Anya and Lexa weren’t busy with school, they had to do chores around the house. Mrs Sarah was very understanding and was actually very nice to them. They were living with her temporarily, until Clea had found a good home for them. They were only allowed to live with a 76 year old because they didn’t have a place to stay. 

Anya was very proud of her little sister. Lexa had almost perfect grades, did lots of chores for Mrs Sarah and rescued stray cats from the streets. But most important, Lexa trusted Anya more and more. She didn’t flinch anymore when Anya touched her and she often sought comfort by her sister. 

Anya sat down next to Mrs Sarah and watched TV with her. Lexa joined them at the couch but continued doing homework. Lexa tapped Anya’s shoulder and pointed at an exercise. Anya explained how to do it and in less than fifteen minutes, Lexa had finished homework. She brought her stuff to their room and came back with her book. Around 8.30 PM, Lexa and Anya headed upstairs to go to bed. They wished Mrs Sarah good night and laid down in their beds.

They shared a room together, just like in most of their former foster homes, with two beds. Often, Lexa crawled in Anya’s bed during the night. Their room wasn’t beautiful but they were still happy with it. Mrs Sarah always let them buy flowers to make it a bit more nice. 

Anya woke up because of a scream. She opened her eyes and looked at her sister’s bed. Lexa was twisting in her bed, mumbling vague words. Anya only heard Lexa talk during her nightmares and when she was by Arizona’s grave. Even though she trusted Anya completely, she still refused to speak. Anya didn’t mind, her sister would talk when she was ready. Maybe she just didn’t have anything to say. 

Anya walked over to her sister’s bed and woke her up. She talked to her to calm her down and wrapped her arms around her younger sister. Anya pushed her on the bed and laid beside her. They cuddled and both fell asleep soon.

The next day, they celebrated Anya’s 15th birthday with cake and a few presents. Mrs Sarah gave Anya a new phone and Lexa gave her sister a book, a stuffed animal and candy. Anya was really happy with all the presents she got. They went out for dinner that evening and Anya picked out a sushi restaurant. They ate way too much and Lexa and Anya plundered the desserts bar. Laughing, they returned home. 

They watched movies all night with popcorn and chips. Halfway through Harry Potter, someone knocked on the door. Anya opened the door and returned with Clea Hopkins. Lexa wanted to go to their room and pack their bags, she knew they had to leave at some point, but Clea told her to relax. They didn’t have to go to another home yet. 

Clea congratulated Anya with her birthday and gave her a present. She had given Lexa her present two days after they left the Jordan family. Anya looked very happy when she had unpacked her present. It was a photo album with pictures from little Anya and Lexa and all pictures they took until now. Anya was almost crying. She lost almost all their pictures from when they were little when their parents got arrested. She gave Clea a hug and thanked her. 

Then, Clea gave Anya another present. It’s from an anonymous person, she hopes you’re happy with it. It was a book with piano songs and tutorials to learn them. Mrs Sarah had an old piano in her apartment and Anya and Lexa loved to play on it. Enthusiast, they ran to the piano and tried the first song. Soon, the room was filled with happy songs. 

Clea left after half an hour and Lexa, Anya and Mrs Sarah continued Harry Potter. They went to bed at 2AM, luckily Anya’s birthday was on a saturday. That night, Lexa and Anya slept together in Anya’s bed, this time without nightmares.

The next day, they visited Arizona’s grave. They saw the same woman they met on Lexa’s birthday again. They had seen her more often at the cemetery. They always greeted each other politely but they never really talked. Anya was happy the woman didn’t start about their parents again. She and Lexa didn’t feel sad about their parents anymore but it was still a bit awkward to talk about it. Anya walked over the cemetery while Lexa was talking to Arizona.

An hour later, they were home. Anya was helping Lexa with her homework and Mrs Sarah was knitting a sweater. In the afternoon, they went to the nearest soccer field to practise for a bit. Lexa was only 9 years old but she was really good at soccer. Anya wasn’t a specialist but she could see her sister getting better every day. She knew exactly which tricks to use and where to shoot. It’s a pity she can’t play at a club. Exhausted, they returned to Mrs Sarah’s apartment. 

When they had been living with Mrs Sarah for almost two months, Clea visited again. This time, they did have to go to another foster home. Disappointed, they packed their bags and said goodbye to Mrs Sarah and the cats. Lexa loved animals and hoped that one day, she would have a dog. In the car, they were praying they would end up in a good foster home this time, and more important, that they could stay together. 

They had no idea where they were going. They drove for about fifteen minutes when Clea parked the car before a huge building. Anya assumed it was an office of child services. They walked into the building and went upstairs with the elevator. 

The floor they stopped at didn’t look like an office at all. The first thing Lexan noticed was the daycare. The walls were painted in bright colours and toys were laying everywhere. They walked further down the hall and there were lots of rooms. Every room had two bunk beds. There were two wardrobes and two desks. Clea led them to an office at the end of the hall. 

“We have to get you two registered,” Clea explained. An annoyed looking woman took the documents Clea handed her and started writing and scanning things. “You have room 609, the left bunk bed. You have to put your bags there, then you can do whatever you want, as long as you stay on this floor. We have a gym in the basement and a sports field outside. If you want to go there, you have to ask it at the counter near the daycare. Don’t make a mess and don’t fight. Got it?” The woman looked strictly at them and Anya and Lexa nodded. 

“Do you want to sleep below or above?” Anya asked Lexa when they stood in their room. As a response, Lexa dropped her bag on the bottom bed. Anya laid her bag on the upper bed and looked around. “It’s not very cozy in here.” Anya looked at Clea. “How long will we be staying here and why can’t we live with Mrs Sarah in the meantime, until we can actually go to our new foster home?” 

“Mrs Sarah is old, Anya,” Clea answered. “She can’t take care of you anymore. There are lots of documents to sign and procedures to follow but the woman who wants to foster you is a lawyer so she’s trying to speed up the process. I don’t know how long you have to be in here but it won’t be longer than two weeks, I promise.”

Sighing, Anya nodded. “Let’s check out the sports field, Lex.” She walked to the counter near the daycare, followed by Lexa. “Can we go to the sports field?” Anya asked the woman behind the counter. “Hi, my name is Sadie,” the woman answered. “Hi, I’m Anya. This is my sister Lexa. Can we go to the sports field?” “Of course, I’ll bring you there.” Enthusiastically, Sadie walked over to the elevator. She pressed a button and soon, they were on the ground floor. They walked to another door than the entrance and ended up by the sports field. 

It wasn’t amazing but it wasn’t bad either. There was a little soccer field, artificial grass of course. Next to the soccer field was a tennis field. There was a big swing and a few little ones, too. Lexa saw a slide for the little kids and one for the bigger kids. 

Anya and Lexa decided to play tennis. They weren’t very good at it but Sadie was cheering them on loudly and slowly, they got a little better at it. Suddenly, a very loud sound rang through over the sports field. All children on the sportsfield, except for Anya and Lexa, ran inside. Surprised, they stood there, wondering what the sound meant. 

“It’s time for dinner. We have to go upstairs. You get dinner in your room,” Sadie explained. Lexa looked at the clock and to her surprise, it was already 6 PM. They walked to the elevators and went upstairs. In their room, they got a plate of pasta. “You have to be in your room at 8.30 PM and be in your bed at 9 PM. Breakfast is at 8 AM, the bell rings at 7.30 AM so you don’t have to worry about waking up in time. Tomorrow, you’ll get a schedule, on it will be when you’re allowed to shower and which chore you have to do and when.” Clea explained. “I have to leave now but if you have questions, the people behind the counter are always available to help you. I’ll come back when I have more news for you. Bye girls.” Clea turned around and left. Now they were on their own. 

They ate dinner in silence. When they were finished, Lexa laid down on her bed, continuing reading her book. When Anya wanted to go to the toilet, Lexa panicked. She was scared she and her sister would be separated. “Lex, we’ll be fine. When I asked Clea when we would leave, she said something about the woman who wants to foster you. If she had found someone for only me, she would have mentioned something about when you would leave. We’ll stay together.” Anya hoped her sister was a little less worried. “I have to use the restroom, be right back, promise.” Lexa nodded and let go of her hand. 

That night, Lexa hand another horrible nightmare. “You want to talk about it?” Anya asked her sister when she had calmed down. Lexa started to write in her notebook.

 

_ I dreamed about the foster home where I was in after Arizona died. The people in there were really scary. When you bothered them, they would lock you up in the basement. It was so dark in there. I wasn’t safe anywhere. At school, I was being bullied and at home, I was so busy trying to avoid making the foster parents angry. There were little kids in there. We were ‘rescued’ when I had lived there for two weeks but it’s still hunting me. I wish I could have helped the other kids in there. Some of them had bad injuries. There was one kid who died, that’s why the neighbors called the police. They saw our foster dad hitting him and called straight away.  _

 

“You’re really strong, you know that?” Anya looked at her little sister with tears in her eyes. “You have been through so much but you never gave up. You always care about other people, even though you need more help than others. I’m proud of you, Lex. Arizona would be so proud of you if she saw who you’ve become.” Lexa hugged her sister and buried her face in her neck. Cuddling, they fell asleep. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed reading. Next chapter will be far more interesting but this just needed to be in it. 
> 
> 2173 words


	12. Child services shelter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anya and Lexa meet their new foster parents.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry it took so long to post this chapter. I've been very busy but I hope you guys are still reading.  
> The chapter is not corrected cause my bete reader is enjoying her vacation. Let me know if you find any mistakes. 
> 
> Enjoy reading

“She’s really busy with the processes they have to go through if they want to foster you, Anya. You’ll meet her soon enough,” Clea said. “What about him? Why can’t we meet him? Do they have children?” Anya was frustrated. She and Lexa had been living in the building of child services for a week now and they hadn’t met the people who wanted to foster them yet. Lexa was really nervous and Anya just wanted to know who they would live with. 

“He’s on a business trip and won’t be back until tomorrow evening. They requested to tell you about their children when they meet you so you have to be patient.” Clea sighed. “It’s not like I want you to live in here but there’s no other option.”

Anya turned around and sat down on her bed. She was desperate and Clea wasn’t helping. “Do you know how hard it is, living in here, for Lexa?” Anya asked. “There are way too many people in here, which makes Lexa very nervous, and they are so loud. It’s never quiet in here and we always have to play with the younger kids cause there are too few employees.” 

“I know it’s hard in here, Anya, but I promise you, you and Lexa will be out of here in no more than a week time, okay?” Clea looked at her questioningly. “Fine, but make sure someone will fix my phone screen. A stupid bitch pulled it out of my hands and dropped it, now my screen is in thousand pieces.” Anya showed Clea her phone and the social worker promised she would get it fixed. 

The day after that, Lexa and Anya finally got good news. Their new foster parents would come that afternoon to meet them. Lexa was really nervous and wouldn’t stop moving around. “Lex, we’ll be okay. Clea promised we would stay together and from what I’ve heard, they seem okay. They both have good jobs and they’re trying to speed up the fostering process,” Anya tried to calm her sister down. Lexa shrugged and continued pacing back and forth. 

That afternoon, Anya and Lexa were brought into an office. They sat down on a chair and waited. Five minutes later, the door opened and two strangers stepped into the room, followed by Clea. “Lexa, Anya, meet your new foster parents, Indra and Gustus Forrest. Mr and Mrs Forrest, these are Anya and Lexa.” Clea introduced them with a smile on her face.

Gustus held out his hand but neither of the girls made an attempt to shook it. Surprised, they stared at the woman. “You’re the woman from the cemetery,” Anya finally said. “Yes, that would be me,” Indra replied. Confused, they all shook hands and sat down around the table. 

Clea left the room and came back with a blocknote and a pen for Lexa. Immediately, Lexa started to write.  _ Why were you at the cemetery?  _ She showed it to Indra. “Why don’t we try to get to know each other a bit? I’ll tell you about it later,” Indra proposed. Lexa nodded and wrote down a few questions.  _ How old are you? Where do you live? Do you have children? Do you have pets?  _ Indra chuckled before answering Lexa’s questions. 

“I’m 34 years old, Gustus is 35 years old. We live two streets away from the cemetery. We don’t have any pets but we were thinking about taking one. About the children…..” Indra looked at Gustus. 

“Yeah, uhm, about that.” Gustus tried to explain. “We had twins, two girls, Niylah and Ninemae. Half a year ago, we were walking home from the playground when a motorcycle drove into us. Indra got lucky and only broke her arm, but Ninemae wasn’t lucky. She died almost immediately. Every time you were at the cemetery, Indra was there to visit our daughter.” 

_ I’m sorry for your loss.  _ Lexa wrote down. Indra and Gustus just nodded. “So, enough about us,” Indra said. “We want to get to know you before we take you home. Why don’t you tell us something about you?” 

 

“I tell them, you write it down?” Anya asked her sister. Lexa nodded and started to write. “I’m Anya, I’m 15 years old. I’ve been in the system since I was 13. I like to play soccer and I taught myself to play the piano. I want to become a detective when I grow up.”

_ I’m 9 years old and I’ve been in the system since I was 6. I love playing soccer and I can play the piano. I want to become a lawyer and I’m the best student in my class.  _

“You taught yourself how to play the piano? That’s very impressive,” Indra complimented them. Anya and Lexa both smiled. “We know everything is a bit of a mess right now but when you live with us, everything will become better. We have a few questions we wanted to ask you if that’s okay,” Gustus looked at them questioningly. Anya nodded and Gustus pulled a note out of his pocket. “I wrote them all down,” he explained. 

 

_ Do you want your own room or do you want to share one? _

_ In which class are you at school? _

_ Are you allergic to anything? _

_ Do you want to play any sports? _

_ Which paint colour do you want on the wall in your room? _

_ ……. _

 

Anya answered all the questions while Lexa wrote her answers down. “The last question might be about a sensitive subject,” Gustus said. “It’s for you, Lexa. Why don’t you talk?” He read. 

Halfway through the conversation, Lexa’s nervousness had disappeared but right now, it came back fast. Desperate, she looked at her sister. 

“Lexa has always been nervous around other people,” Anya started to explain. “I don’t know exactly what happened but since the night Thelonius got arrested, she hasn’t spoken a single word.” 

“I’m sorry I asked, I understand it’s a very difficult situation. Do you know what happened with your former foster dad?” Gustus asked. “No, we’ve been switching homes a lot and we were busy with other things. To be honest, I haven’t really thought about it that much. I wonder what happened with him and his friends, though.” “I’m sure I can find that out for you,” Indra said. “I’ll look into it and give you information the next time we meet.” “Thank you so much, that would be very helpful.” 

“I’m really sorry but visiting times are over,” Clea interrupted. “You can meet again tomorrow if you want.” All four of them nodded eagerly. “Well, I guess we’ll see each other tomorrow then,” Gustus said uneasily. “Yeah, see you tomorrow,” Anya replied. 

After dinner, Anya and Lexa returned to their rooms. “So, what do you think about them?” Anya asked her sister.  _ They seem nice.  _ Lexa wrote in her notebook.  _ But they all seem nice at the beginning. I hope this is it for us.  _ “We’ll be fine, Lex. We always have each other.” That night, they slept in the same bed. The next morning, they woke up cuddling each other. 

“You have to eat, Lex. I know you’re nervous but breakfast is important.” Anya tried to get her sister to eat something but Lexa refused. Anya cut off a piece of toast and held it in front of her sister. “Eat!” Lexa was about to write her response when Clea walked over to them. 

“Girls, Indra and Gustus came early,” She announced. Then she saw that Lexa hadn’t eaten her toast. “But you can only see them if you’ve finished breakfast,” She added quickly. As fast as she could, Lexa ate her toast and drank her orange juice. They followed Clea to an office where Indra and Gustus were waiting for them.

“Hi girls,” Indra and Gustus said in unison. Anya greeted them back, Lexa just waved. They all sat down around the table. “I’ve been looking into Thelonius’ case,” Indra announced. “He’s convicted and in jail, so are his friends. Thelonius is serving 10 years but can get parole after 6 years. I haven’t really looked into the punishment of his friends but I know they are in jail for at least a year.” 

Relieved, Anya and Lexa thanked Indra. They were both happy that Thelonius was in jail but Anya could feel something was wrong with her sister. Lexa started fiddling with her sleeves when she heard about the case and everytime Thelonius was mentioned, she pushed her nails in her arm. Under the table, Anya grabbed her sisters hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze. 

Now the heavy part of the conversation was over, they were more comfortable. “Does Niylah know that you want to foster us?” Anya asked. Indra and Gustus hesitated for a moment before Indra replied. “She knows we want to foster a kid, she doesn’t know it will be two kids and she also doesn’t know about you.”  _ What do you mean ‘about us?  _ Lexa wrote down. “What Indra tried to say,” Gustus answered, “is that Niylah doesn’t know we’ve already chosen who we want to foster. She only knows we’ve been thinking about it.” 

“When are you going to tell her?” Anya asked. “When the fostering process is over,” Indra replied.  _ What if she doesn’t want us? She lost her sister half a year ago, she probably doesn’t want a new sister, let alone two.  _ Lexa showed the notebook to Indra and Gustus. “How about we worry about that when you come home with us? We don’t know how she’ll react, maybe she would love to have sisters to play with.” Gustus looked calmly at them. The sisters nodded but weren’t fully convinced. 

They said goodbye after spending two and a half hours with each other. Indra and Gustus promised to come visit the next day. Happy, Anya and Lexa went to the sports field with Sadie, who was their biggest fan. Every time they wanted to go downstairs, Sadie insisted she walked with them, every time they had a question, Sadie answered it and when she could, Sadie stopped by their room and started a long conversation. 

This time, Sadie told them about the time she tried med school but she failed. That’s how she ended up here. She wanted to work for child services, had the right education and started working here. Sadie claimed she loved playing soccer but Anya and Lexa knew she lied. She shot with the tip of her foot and was just bad at playing soccer. However, Lexa was happy Sadie took the effort to play with them. There weren’t much people who had done that for her. 

The next day, Anya and Lexa were waiting the whole day for Indra and Gustus to come visit them. When the last visiting period after dinner was over, Anya dragged a crying Lexa to their room. Both girls were afraid Indra and Gustus decided they didn’t want them anymore. 

When it was bedtime, they still hadn’t heard from Indra, Gustus or Clea. Anya had expected their social worker would come visit them and explain why Indra and Gustus weren’t there but even she bailed on them.  _ They’ll bring us to another foster home, just like the one before. People who don’t love us and only care about money. I don’t want to to this anymore.  _ Lexa showed the note to her sister. Anya nodded understanding. She didn’t want to go through all that either.

 

TWO HOURS LATER

Clea was busy with paperwork when she got a call from Sadie.  _ “They’re gone Clea. Lexa and Anya aren’t here. I think they ran away, their stuff is gone too.”  _ “I’ll be there in 10 minutes.”

Clea ran into the child services building and took the elevator upstairs. “What happened, why did no one see them leaving?” Clea asked angrily. “Isn’t it your job to look after them?” “It doesn’t matter, we have to find them. It’s raining really hard and they can get sick if we don’t find them soon.” Sadie pulled on her coat and ran to the elevator, followed by Clea. 

They drove around the neighborhood for hours. Suddenly, Clea had an idea of where they might be. She drove to their destination, far over the speed limit. “Where do you think they are?” Sadie asked. 

After 20 minutes driving, they arrived at their destination. Clea ran out of the car. What she saw broke her heart. There, at the cemetery, next to Arizona’s grave laid two girls. The big one draped her body over the little one, using her body as a human shield. 

“LEXA! ANYA!” Screaming, Clea and Sadie ran over to the girls.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all the hits, kudos, comments and bookmarks. It makes me happy to see you like the story.  
> Next chapter will probably up in two days. 
> 
> 2112 words


	13. Indra and Gustus' home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really sorry for updating less and less. School is about to start and since I want to study medicine, I have a lot to do. I have to do an internship and volunteer work. I also have to build up a CV and do a summerschool. I hope you guys are still reading. 
> 
> Enjoy!

In the morning, Lexa woke up in an unfamiliar bed. She looked around but there was no sign of her sister. Slowly, she got up and walked to the door. She felt weak. In this state, she couldn’t protect herself but she had to find her sister. She walked down the hall and saw the living room. She recognised Sadie, sitting on the couch.  _ What the hell is she doing here? Why am I here, with her?  _

As soon as Sadie saw Lexa, she stood up and walked over to her. She wanted to wrap an arm around her and help her to the couch but a familiar voice interrupted. “Don’t!” Clea said. “She doesn’t want to be touched by anyone but her sister.” Sadie didn’t know what to do. “Come sit in the couch with us,” she requested. Lexa walked over to the couch and sat down relieved. Clea handed her a pen and a notebook and immediately, Lexa started to write. 

_ Where is Anya? Why am I here? What’s going to happen with us? _

“Anya is sleeping in the other bedroom, she’ll join us when she wakes up,” Clea explained. “You and your sister walked away from the child services shelter yesterday. Both of you were subcooled since you were outside in the rain for like two hours. I don’t know why you walked away, though. I was hoping one of you could tell me that.” 

Slowly, everything from the evening before came back. The waiting, the fear, the decision to leave. She started to write and Clea and Sadie waited patiently. 

_ They didn’t come. They didn’t want us anymore. We didn’t want to be separated again. We didn’t want to go to another family who only cared about the money, not about us. We can survive on our own, we always have. Arizona is the only one who ever cared about us so that’s where we went.  _

“I’m really sorry they didn’t come, Lexa,” Clea said. She wanted to say more but was interrupted by sounds coming from the other bedroom. “I’m going to check on her,” Sadie said. 

Sadie came back, followed by a cranky Anya. “What’s all this about? Couldn’t you just leave us alone?” “I was just about to explain, Anya. Have a seat,” Clea responded. 

“As I told your sister, we found you at the cemetery, subcooled. We took you here to make sure you would be okay. Lexa told us why you ran away.” 

“What’s this place anyway?” Anya asked. “This is my apartment,” Clea told.  _ Why didn’t you take us back to child services?  _ Lexa wrote down. “Let me continue my story, you’ll get an answer, I promise.” 

“Indra and Gustus didn’t come yesterday because they were busy, not because they didn’t want you anymore.” Anya was about to interrupt but Clea just continued speaking. “They were busy with making your room ready for you.” 

Anya and Lexa looked confused. “Does this mean they are officially fostering us?” Anya asked, full of disbelief. “Yes, they were going to pick you up this morning. They wanted it to be a surprise but you kind of ruined it,” Clea said laughing. 

_ Are we in trouble? Can we still live with them? They seem nice.  _ Lexa wrote down. “Of course, that’s why you’re here. Sadie only told me that you were gone. I told my boss I took you with me to relieve some stress and she was okay with it. No one knows you walked away and no one will ever know cause then we all will be in trouble, deal?” 

Anya, Lexa and Sadie nodded. “I’ll let Indra and Gustus know they can pick you up here,” Clea said before walking away with her phone. The other three girls sat in an awkward silence. 

“So, I guess this is it.” Sadie looked at them with a sad face. “It was nice meeting you and it was fun with you guys.” “It was nice to meet you too, Sadie.” Lexa nodded in agreement. “I’m really going to miss you. I know I’m not supposed to get attached but still,” Sadie said almost crying. Anya stood up and gave her a hug. 

Clea came back and announced that Indra and Gustus would come to pick them up in half an hour. “Thank you so much for all that you’ve done for us, Clea.” Anya gave the woman a hug. “I really hope they are it for you, girls,” Clea replied. “If something is wrong, please come to me right away. If I need to get you two out of there, I will. You deserve a good family and so much more.” 

In that moment, Lexa realised there was someone who did care about them. She started to write in her notebook while her sister was still talking to Sadie and Clea. When she was finished, she stood up and showed it to Clea and Sadie. 

_ Dear Sadie and Clea, _

_ Thank you so much for all that you have done for us. We are grateful to you forever. No one ever cared about us but you did and it means a lot to us. I won’t ever forget about any of you and I wish you all the luck and love in life.  _

Crying, Clea and Sadie thanked the girl. They all sat down and talked and laughed, waiting for Indra and Gustus. 

Half an hour later, the doorbell rang. Clea stood up and walked to the door to open it while Anya and Lexa went to the other rooms to grab their stuff. When they came back into the living room, Indra and Gustus stood there, a little uncomfortable. 

“I hope you’re not mad at us for not coming yesterday,” Indra said. “We wanted it to be a surprise, I’m sorry if we hurt you, that wasn’t our intention.” “That’s okay, we’re really happy we’re going home with you.” Anya and Lexa both smiled at the people in front of them. “Let’s get you guys home,” Gustus said. 

They said goodbye to Sadie and put their stuff in the car. Clea would come with them. Once she had inspected the house again, Indra and Gustus had to sign the papers and Anya and Lexa would have a new home. Nervous, they sat in the car, hoping everything would be fine and Indra and Gustus would sign the papers.

When they arrived at the house, Lexa couldn’t believe her eyes. It wasn’t a house, it was more like a villa. It was so big and they had an unbelievable large garden. They walked into the house and stood in a big hall. They hang their coats on the coat rack and Clea started inspecting every inch of the house. 

“We’ll show you your room,” Gustus said. Anya decided it was better if she and Lexa slept in the same room. That way, they would be less of a burden and she could help her sister when she had a nightmare.  

They walked upstairs and saw lots of doors. They all had wooden letters on them. Their room had ‘Anya & Lexa’ on the door, also in wooden letters. Gustus opened the door and they walked inside. 

For 5 minutes, everyone was silent. Indra and Gustus were nervous as hell. Waiting for the kids’ reaction. It was Indra who broke the silence. “You don’t like it? It’s okay, we can change everything you want. We just wanted it to be ready for you so you could sleep in your own room and, and….” She kept rambling until Anya interrupted her. “It’s perfect.” Anya looked at the woman. Lexa nodded and smiled. 

“We’ll give you some time to put your stuff away and look around a bit,” Gustus said. Astonished, Lexa sat down on the bed. The walls were painted green, there were two beautiful wooden beds and there were bright decorations everywhere. Enthusiastically, she ran to the bookcase and looked at all the children’s books. 

Anya couldn’t believe what she saw. “Lex, come have a look at this, it’s amazing!” Lexa walked through a door in their room and couldn’t believe what she saw either. “We have our own bathroom!” Anya was over the moon. They would never have to shower in a dirty bathroom and maybe they were allowed to shower more than three times a week. 

When they had seen their whole bed- and bathroom, they walked downstairs to find Indra and Gustus. “Hi girls, is everything okay so far?” The sisters nodded enthusiastically. “We have never had an own bathroom, it’s so luxurious,” Anya said. Indra chuckled. “You’re allowed to shower and bath whenever you want. If you need anything, just let us know.” 

Gustus walked into the living room, looking concerned. He turned to Indra and explained what was wrong. “Niylah got into a fight at school.” “Do you know what happened? Do we have to pick her up?” Indra looked concerned too. “I don’t know what happened but we have to pick her up now.” 

“Is there something wrong?” Clea asked. “Niylah got into a fight at school, we have to pick her up.” Gustus hoped it wouldn’t influence the fostering process. “If you pick up Niylah, I can stay here with the girls,” Indra suggested. Gustus looked questioningly at Clea, silently asking for permission. Clea nodded and pulled out some documents. 

“Everything about the house seems great. You really have the perfect place for Anya and Lexa. You have to sign the papers, then everything is completed.” Clea handed over the papers to Gustus. He signed them and gave them to Indra. Anya had to sign too, Lexa just had to write her name since she didn’t have a signature yet. “Congratulations, you’re officially part of the Forrest family.” Clea looked happily at the sisters. “Thank you so much for making this happen, Clea,” Anya thanked her social worker. Clea said goodbye to everyone and left. 

“Do you want anything to eat or to drink?” Indra asked the sisters. “Yes, we both want water, please,” Anya replied. They sat down at the kitchen table and Indra brought them a glass of water and cake. They were talking and eating until Gustus came back with Niylah. 

Niylah stormed into the house. She ran to her mother and wrapped her arms around her. Indra noticed that her daughter was crying and asked what was wrong. “A boy from my class told me that it was stupid I was getting foster sisters. He said it was against god’s rules. He said god never made mistakes but he did make one. He killed Ninemae.” Niylah started crying harder and louder. Indra comforted her and waited until she stopped crying. “You can just ignore him, you know. You don’t have to fight with him to prove your point. There are lots of other kids in the class, just avoid him. He’s mean but it’s not really his fault, he’s just raised that way.” Niylah nodded and dried her tears. 

When her mother turned around to grab her some cake, Niylah noticed the two girls sitting at the kitchen table. Shy, she hid behind her mother. “It’s okay honey,” Indra said. “Niylah, these are your sisters, Anya and Lexa. Girls, this is our daughter, Niylah.” “Hi,” Anya greeted her. Lexa stared at the girl but didn’t say anything. 

Gustus noticed that Lexa was uncomfortable. “Niylah, why don’t you go upstairs and do your homework? You have soccer practise later,” He asked his daughter. Niylah nodded and walked upstairs. 

Anya and Lexa walled the rest of the day through the house and garden, exploring their new home. Lexa loved the garden. There was a tree house, a pool and a mini soccer field. Anya and Lexa were playing soccer for half an hour when Niylah joined them. In the half and hour Niylah played with them, Lexa found out Niylah was really good. Especially since she was only 9 years old. Lexa just didn’t know she was just as good. 

That night, they went out for dinner. Anya and Lexa were allowed to choose, of course they choose a sushi restaurant. Lexa was really happy. So far, their new family seemed nice. Lexa hoped they would be safe here. 

That night, Lexa felt safe enough to sleep in her own bed for the first time in months. Anya was so proud of her sister. “This is it Lex, we’re going to make it.” Lexa smiled at her sister. “Goodnight Lexa”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all the hits, kudos, comments and bookmarks. I'm not going to say "give me more kudos and stuff and I'll update more often" cause I update as much as possible. Also, I only want the kudos and all if you like the story, not because I ask for it.   
> Thank you so much for all the support. I hope the story is still enjoying to read. 
> 
> 2082 words


	14. Happily ever after?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anya and Lexa learn how it is to live in a normal family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for the mistakes. It's 11 PM right now and I was up at 6.30 AM today so I'm pretty tired. Let me know if you find any mistakes. 
> 
> Enjoy reading

The next morning, Lexa woke up at 10 AM. She panicked a little when her sister didn’t lay in the bed beside her but then she remembered where she was.  _ I’m home, I’m with Indra and Gustus. I have a little sister.  _ She quickly dressed herself and walked down the stairs. 

Anya was sitting at the kitchen table, chatting with Indra while eating breakfast. “Morning Lex,” she greeted her sister. “Come sit with us. What do you want for breakfast?” Indra asked. She pointed to Anya’s plate. “You want the same as Any? It’ll be there in a minute.” 

5 minutes later, Lexa got a plate full. Hungry, she started to eat. Indra walked out of the room and came back with a notebook and a pen. She handed it to Lexa. “You can’t always carry a notebook and a pen with you, Lexa. You have to find another way to communicate with us.” Indra looked at her concerned. Tears fell from Lexa’s eyes. She wanted to talk to them but she just couldn’t. She was still scared, she didn’t feel safe enough. 

“Lex, she didn’t mean to make you cry. No one is forcing you to talk, okay?” Anya hugged her sister and tried to calm her down. “Everything is okay, you’re safe.”  _ Safe? How can I be safe? I have to go to school? Indra, Gustus and Niylah don’t know about Alexander.  _ Lexa thought. 

“I have a solution, Lexa. I think it might be able to help you,” Indra said carefully. Anya and Lexa looked at her questioningly. “We can all follow classes to learn sign language. That way, you don’t have to talk but we can still communicate.” In that moment, nothing could describe how happy Lexa felt.  _ She’s not forcing me to talk. She understands me. She’s helping me. She found a solution.  _ Lexa nodded eagerly.  _ Thank you so much for understanding and helping me.  _ She wrote down and showed to Indra. “You’re welcome, sweety. I’ll have a look at different classes and pick one for all of us. We’ll start as soon as possible.” 

“Mom, is Lexa going to the same school as I? Can she be in my class?” Niylah asked enthusiastically. “We’ll think about that later. Anya and Lexa need time to adjust to the situation first,” Indra explained to her youngest daughter. “Can we be in the same class if she goes to my school?” Niylah asked again. Lexa was only three months older than Niylah so she is in the same year as the younger girl. “Only if Lexa wants that and of course, the school has to agree with it first,” Indra answered. “Lexa, do you want to be in my class? It would be really fun and than I have finally someone to play soccer with during break.” Niylah couldn’t hide her enthusiasm. Lexa nodded, happy her foster sister liked her so much she wanted to be in the same class. 

“Niylah is playing a soccer game with her team this afternoon, would you like to come and watch?” Indra asked the sisters. Before Anya could say something Lexa nodded eagerly. “I guess we’ll be coming to the game,” Anya said chuckling. “Great, we’re leaving at 2 PM. Gustus won’t be back from work until 3 PM so he’ll be coming to the game on his own. 

At 2.15 PM, they arrived at the soccer club. The game wouldn’t start until 3 PM but the team had to be there early to get changed and do a warming up. Excited, Lexa and Anya stood beside the field where Niylah was doing her warming up. The team looked nice but Lexa noticed that Niylah wasn’t really talking to anyone.  _ Maybe she doesn’t have friends. Maybe that’s why she wants me in her class, to be her friend.  _ In that moment, Lexa decided that she would love to be Niylah’s friend. The team started an exercise with shooting on the goal. When Niylah scored, Anya cheered loudly and Lexa clapped her hands as hard as she could. Niylah smiled widely when she heard it. 

The game started and Niylah was playing right-back. She was really strong and most attacks were at the left side of the field. Because everyone was focussed on the left side of the field, Niylah had the chance to run forward. No one noticed her, no opponent was defending her. Her teammate shot the ball to another girl, who passed the ball to Niylah. Niylah ran over the field with the ball. She was close to the goal. In the corner of her eye, she could see two defenders approaching. She passed the ball to the center forward. The center forward ran further with the ball. Instead of running back to her place, Niylah ran further to the goal. The center forward gave her an assist, one the goalkeeper didn’t expect. Niylah shot the ball to the left corner of the goal. The ball flew along the keeper’s hands, into the net. 

Everyone was cheering loudly. Niylah’s team was leading with 1-0. The rest of the first half was calm. Neither of the teams scored and The Grounders were still leading with 1-0. The teams went back to the team rooms. Anya, Lexa and Indra went to the canteen. They bought something to drink and candy. “She’s really good,” Anya said to Indra. “Yeah, my baby loves playing soccer.” A sad look covered her face. “Niylah used to play with Ninemae, they were the best on the team together. Come one, we have to go. The next 30 minutes are starting. 

The second half was nerve wracking. In the 41th minute, the opponents managed to score a goal. Determined, The Grounders fought back. With 8 minutes left, Niylah managed to shoot the ball over the midfield. The right forward picked it up and ran to the goal. She gave an assist and with a complicated move, the center forward dodged the last defender and scored. Everyone cheered loudly and The Grounders were determined to win. 

When the final whistle sounded, The Grounders fell down from exhaustion. They had managed to keep the opposite team from making a goal. Everyone cheered loudly for them. Indra hugged her daughter and Anya told Niylah how good she was on the field. Happy, Niylah returned to the team room and changed her clothes. 

At home, Niylah had to shower and do her homework. Anya and Lexa wanted to go upstairs but Indra stopped Anya. “I want to talk with you if that's okay.” She motioned for Anya to come with her to the kitchen. “You wait for me upstairs, Lex,” Anya asked her sister. Lexa nodded and walked to her bedroom. 

Indra and Anya sat down at the kitchen table. “What do you want to talk about?” Anya asked the older woman. “You and Lexa are living here now,” Indra said. “You will be treated the same as Niylah. Niylah plays soccer so if you want to play a sport or an instrument or something than you are allowed to do that. We'll pay for everything.” “Thank you Indra, it would be amazing to have a hobby,” Anya replied. “I wanted to ask Lexa if she would like to play soccer in Niylah’s team. Lexa seems really interested and as you have probably noticed, Niylah doesn't have many friends.” “I think Lexa would love to be in the team with Niylah. I don't know why but Lexa is always uncomfortable with people she doesn't know. With Niylah, she isn't uncomfortable at all.” Indra smiled at her. “I hope you two can be happy here, with us. You deserve that after all you’ve been through.”

During dinner, Indra informed Gustus about the sign language classes. “I looked up some things online and I found a woman who can come here and teach us. She has a good reputation so I think we can try it.” Gustus nodded and spoke to Lexa. “Is this really what you want? Cause if you don’t want it, we understand. We can always look for something else to help you.” Lexa nodded and wrote down that she really wanted this and that she thought it was the perfect solution, temporary or permanently. 

When they were eating dessert, Indra finally asked the question she wanted to ask Lexa all day. “So Lexa, I saw you were very interested in Niylah’s soccer game. I’ve seen you play in the garden and you are really good. Would you like to join the soccer club as well? I know they are looking for more players in Niylah’s team.” A big smile covered Lexa’s face.  _ I would love to play soccer in Niylah’s team. Thank you for this.  _ She wrote down in her notebook. “We’ll have you registered as soon as possible,” Gustus promised her. “Until then, I’m sure you can train with Niylah at the club.” Happy, Lexa finished her dinner and helped with the dishes. 

That night, Lexa really felt safe and happy. She had parents who wanted to help her with problems other people ignored. Everyone thought Lexa was asking for attention, but Indra and Gustus didn’t question her. They helped whenever it was possible. They even let her play soccer. She still didn’t dare to speak to them about her having male parts. She hoped it wouldn’t matter to her. 

Anya came out of the bathroom and crawled into her own bed. She was happy for Lexa that she finally felt safe enough to sleep in her own bed. Although she enjoyed cuddling her sister and sleeping in one bed, she knew Lexa had to get used to it. Maybe one day, Lexa felt secure enough to ask for her own bedroom. Not that Anya was complaining, the room they shared was about three times as big as a normal room for one person. Exhausted from today, Anya drifted off to sleep. “Goodnight Lexa.” 

What she didn’t expect was an answer from her sister. “Goodnight Anya.” Anya decided not to talk about it with Lexa tonight, they had enough time the next day. 

Sunday morning, Anya and Lexa woke up early. They decided to make breakfast for the rest of the family. While cooking breakfast, Anya brought up what happened yesterday evening. “You talked to me yesterday, Lex.” It wasn’t a question. Lexa nodded, not planning on saying anything this time. “You can talk whenever you want, whenever you’re ready. Just because you said something yesterday, doesn’t mean I expect you to talk today. Just take your time.” Anya laid her hand on Lexa’s arm to give her some comfort. Happily, Lexa grabbed her sister’s hand and gave it a light squeeze. 

Indra, Gustus and Niylah came downstairs at the same time, woken up by the delicious smell of breakfast. Anya and Lexa handed them their plates and the five sat down at the kitchen table, eating in silence. 

“So, what are your plans for today?” Gustus asked. “We don’t know actually,” Anya replied. “Have you thought about what hobby you’d like to do?” Indra asked the older girl. Anya hesitated. She knew what she wanted to do but she didn’t want to bother them and it was really expensive. Indra saw the hesitation in her eyes and tried to reassure her she could pick everything. “Money doesn’t matter to us, Anya. It’s not like we don’t have enough and we like to see you happy. You can tell what you want to do and we’ll see if it is possible.” “I’d love to play the piano,” Anya confessed shyly. “That’s great, honey. We actually have a piano in the music room. It’s an amazing piano, good quality, great sound, it only has to be tuned.” 

That’s how, two days later, Anya had her first piano lesson. Lexa loved playing piano too but she loved soccer a little more. They decided that Anya would take lessons and after each lesson she would teach her sister what she had learned. Lexa was allowed to play the piano too. In return, Lexa and Niylah taught Anya tricks and moves with the soccer ball. The three of them were good friends even though Niylah was still a bit scared of Anya. 

It was on their 5th day living with the Forrest family that Lexa got the news she was waiting for since the day after they got there. “I made an appointment with the woman who can teach us sign language,” Indra announced. “She’ll come tomorrow. I know it’s a bit short time but she has a tight schedule.” Excited, Lexa jumped through the house. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all the kudos, hits, comments and bookmarks. I was amazed about how many I had received. As someone in the comments mentioned. "I hope you don't give up on this fic."  
> I want to say something about that. I absolutely hate it when people abandon their fic, expecially since some fics are so amazingly good written.   
> I start school on monday. I have a very stupid schedule so I'm 4 days a week done at 4.10 PM and one 1 a week at 3.10 PM and I have a LOT of homework. I also have a dog who needs attention and I have piano lessons, which I have to practise for. I also want to do volunteer work cause I love helping people and I need it cause I want to study medicine. So I'm not sure there will be much time left. I'll try to write in the evenings and whenever I have time. I hop you guys keep reading cause I don't want to stop this story. I started to love it, even though my English sucks and some parts of the story are really bad. I hope you guys understand. 
> 
> 2105 words


	15. Learning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Forrest family learnes sign language. Anya and Lexa have their first school day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WATCH OUT!: Everything between ** is signed. I won't add " but most of the time, it's Lexa signing and the others just talk out loud. 
> 
> Enjoy reading

Wednesday, Lexa was super nervous. That afternoon, the teacher would come to their house to introduce herself and stuff. Lexa was excited to learn how to communicate with her new family but she was also scared she would be bad at it and it wouldn’t work.

“What’s wrong, Lexa?” Niylah asked her. They were playing soccer in the garden but Lexa wasn’t paying attention. “Are you nervous for this afternoon?” The younger girl asked. Lexa nodded while shooting the ball in the goal. “You don’t have to be. I’m sure it’ll be fine. We’re all going to try it and of course you won’t be able to do it right away, no one will. That woman is here to learn it to us, it just takes time.” Lexa was happy that the younger girl tried to comfort her but her nervousness didn’t disappear. Finally, they heard a car driving to the house. They ran inside as fast as they could.

Indra, Gustus, Anya, Lexa and Niylah stood in the living room, waiting for the teacher to arrive. Finally, they heard a knock on the door. Gustus opened the door and came back with the woman. “Hello, my name is Aliya, I’ll be your teacher for sign language,” the woman introduced herself. “Hi, we’re the Forrest family.” Indra introduced all of them. “I’m Indra, this is Gustus, Anya, Lexa and Niylah.” They all shook hands and walked to the living room.

They talked a lot about what to expect and how to proceed. They agreed to have lessons everyday for the first two weeks, since it was important for Lexa to be able to sign. Aliya taught them a few simple things like ‘hello’ and ‘goodbye’ before she left. Lexa had never felt so happy. Indra and Gustus were really enthusiastic about the sign lessons and everyone did their best to learn sign.

After dinner, Indra and Gustus called a family meeting. “We need to talk about schools,” Gustus announced. Lexa was less uncomfortable with that as she expected to be but she still didn’t like it. “Anya, there is a good school for you about 5 minutes by bike and it had a music program so you’ll be able to play piano at school if you like. It’s not required so if you don’t want it than that’s fine.” Anya nodded and replied. “I’d like to do the music program if possible, I’d love to play more piano.” “We’ll get you registered.”

“Lexa, for you we thought about joining Niylah’s class. They have a good teacher who happens to speak sign language. The school offers lot’s of support for their students and they have programs for children who can work independently very well.” Indra looked at her, asking for a reaction. Lexa grabbed her notebook and started to write.

_I would love to join Niylah’s class but only with the independently working program cause I hate teachers who explain too much._

“We’ll get you registered as well,” Gustus promised her.

In the days that followed, Lexa helped Niylah doing her homework so she knew what to expect at school. Niylah was smart but Lexa was like super smart. Together, they finished Niylah’s homework in no time. Lexa joined Niylah at soccer practise and slowly, they became very close friends. Lexa still depended on Anya and that wouldn’t change soon. Anya hang out with them a lot and Niylah wasn’t scared of her anymore.

Finally, Lexa and Anya were allowed to go to school, their first day would be in two days. They were both excited and hanging in the house all day started to get bored. The girls seemed fine but Indra was worried. She didn’t mind that Lexa didn’t talk but both girls hadn’t unpacked their bags yet and the older woman wondered why.

Indra had talked with Gustus about it but he didn’t know either. Since the girls had formed a friendship with Niylah, Indra decided to ask her daughter. “Niy, do you know why Anya and Lexa haven’t unpacked their bags yet?” “I’m not sure mom, but I think I have an idea why,” Niylah answered to her mother. “What do you think?” Indra asked. “I think they are scared that when things go wrong, you and dad will send them back. They don’t unpack because they are prepared to leave.” Niylah looked at her mother, hoping it was the right thing to share this information with her mother. “Thank you, Niy.”

The evening before Anya and Lexa had their first day of school, Indra decided to talk to them about unpacking their bags. She knocked on their bedroom door and waited for permission to come in. “Come on in,” Anya replied. Indra walked over to Anya’s bed and sat down.

“Hi girls, everything ready for tomorrow?” She asked. They both nodded. “We’re a little nervous but I think it’ll be okay. Luckily Lexa already knows Niylah so she won’t be on her own in class,” Anya said.

“I wanted to talk to you two about something.” Indra looked nervous. “I noticed you haven’t unpacked your bags yet, may I ask why?” Anya sighed. She didn’t want to offend her foster parents but she knew she had to give some sort of explanation. “It always seems to be good in new foster homes. It just went wrong so many times, I don’t know if this will be different. We don’t want to unpack if we have to pack again when we have to leave.” Anya looked at her foster mother, who seemed lost in her own thoughts.

 _She said ‘when we have to leave’ not ‘if we have to leave.’_ Indra thought. “I know things were different before but we welcomed you in our home because we wanted to give you a future. We won’t send you back, nor when things get bad. We’ll figure it out.” Indra hoped her words would give some comfort.

“Thank you Indra, but it’s still too soon.  We’ll unpack when it’s the right time, right now, it doesn’t feel good. I don’t want to offend you but it’s just, it went wrong every time we had a foster home. It’s hard to let go of the feeling in my stomach and just go for it. Our feelings have been hurt too many times.”

Indra nodded understandingly. “I hope the right time will come soon, we want you to feel home in this house, in our family. Good night girls.” Indra stood up and left.

The next morning, Anya and Lexa were stressing while running through the house. They had to shower, do their hair, eat breakfast and still be on time to go to school. Indra would drive them because Gustus was already at work. Anya was stressing about her books, her schedule changed suddenly and she couldn’t find her maths notebook. Lexa and Niylah were fighting about the orange juice, too stressed out to wait ten seconds.

Finally, they were all finished and good to go. Surprisingly, they made it in time. Lexa and Niylah’s school was the closest so Indra drove first to their school. After that, the drove to Anya’s, who had to start fifteen minutes later than her younger sisters.

 

Lexa   
Nervous, Lexa stood in front of the class. “Good morning, everyone,” Mr Evans, their teacher, greeted the class. “This is Lexa, Niylah’s sister. She’ll be joining our class for the rest of the year. Be nice to her and help her when she needs help.” “Niylah’s sister is dead!” A boy screamed through the class. Lexa was shocked. How dared that boy screaming things like that through the class. He knew it would hurt Niylah.

While the teacher was sending him to the headmaster’s office, Lexa walked over to Niylah. Niylah was silently crying and hid her face in her arms. Clumsily, Lexa wrapped an arm around the girl, trying to soothe her. After a while, she stopped crying. The teacher asked if she was okay and Niylah just nodded.

Lexa helped Niylah with school work and Niylah helped Lexa. They only communicated with each other, sometimes in sign, most of the times just writing in Lexa’s notebook. During break, they played soccer together. They taught each other tricks and tried some moves. Lexa was allowed to play in the next soccer game, since the team was one player short.

After break, the class had to work independently. Mr Evans walked over to Lexa and asked her if everything was going alright so far. Lexa just nodded and continued working. Mr Evans knew about Lexa’s problem with speaking and he knew sign language. He hoped she would be able to communicate and not getting bullied by other kids from class. He didn’t have to worry about that. During second break, the boy from earlier, Malcolm, was bullying her. Niylah stood up for her but it didn’t work. After a while, Lexa thought it was enough. She punched the boy hard in the face, just like Anya always did by scary foster fathers. Malcolm fell on the ground, his hand covering his nose. Blood flooded over his hand.

That afternoon, Niylah and Lexa sat in the headmaster’s office, waiting for Indra. The headmaster told their mother what happened and Indra was proud Lexa stood up for herself. She also praised her daughter for stepping up for her sister. They were allowed to go home and the headmaster promised Malcolm would be punished.

“That was a nice first day, huh?” Indra said to the girls. *The teacher is nice and Niylah helped me a lot today.* “I’m glad you and Niylah get on well with each other,” Indra replied. “Lexa is super smart, mom. I understand everything when she explains it. Mr Evans can certainly learn something from her,” Niylah said with a chuckle.

 

Anya  
“Students, pay attention please,” Mr Kane shouted through the class. “Everyone, this is Anya, she’ll be joining your class from now on. Please make her feel welcome and help her through the first weeks.” Mr Kane pointed at an empty table near a girl who was almost sleeping. She sat down and grabbed her books. Mr Kane started his English language and literature class. It was way too easy and Anya understood why the girl next to her was sleeping. “Hi, I’m Tris. Sorry for being rude, I was up until 2 AM and I needed to catch up to some sleep.” “That’s okay Tris. I’m Anya.” They talked the whole lesson and Tris offered to walk with her to biology, since she had that class too.

The whole day, Tris stayed by Anya’s side and Anya was really happy the girl was so helpful. During lunch, Anya sat with Tris and her friends. “Guys, this is Anya,” Tris introduced her. “Anya, these are Diana, Lucy, Artigas and Quint. Welcome to the squad.” They ate lunch and talked a lot. After lunch, she and Tris didn’t have any classes together since Anya had music lessons while Tris had basketball training.

Artigas walked with Anya to the music department. They parted ways since Anya went to piano class and Artigas played the drums. Anya loved the piano lesson. She leaned so much in just two hours. She promised her teacher she would practise at home a lot.

Happily, she waited outside the school for Indra. After fifteen minutes, Anya got slightly concerned. After half an hour, Indra finally arrived. “I’m so sorry Anya. I kinda forgot. I had to pick up Niylah and Lexa from school, Lexa got into a fight.”

Anya looked at her sister on the back seat. “Lex,” she said with a threatening voice, “Why did you fight on your first school day?” _This asshole from class made a comment about Niylah’s sister. During break, he bullied me because I don’t speak and when Niylah stood up for me, he started to scold her out. I just punched him in the face and he only had a nose bleed, I didn’t punch that hard._  Lexa wrote down. Satisfied with the answer, Anya moved to another topic. She told Indra about her first school day and Lexa was happy that her sister had already made friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all your support. I know I say that a lot but it really helps me. I'm pretty insecure in real life but it feels good to know people like my story. I won't give up on this. 
> 
> The reason Lexa is not talking will be revealed at some point but I don't know exactely when. It'll probably take a while and I'm still not sure who she's going to tell. 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed reading.  
> 2034 words
> 
> SPOILER FOR NEXT CHAPER:
> 
> Lexa will have the talk with Indra about her being intersex.


	16. The talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexa 'talks' to Indra about her being intersex. The conversation is different than Lexa expected.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys, you are all amazing. I love the support you give me. You all have helped me so much. If you ever need someone to talk to or if you're just bored, email me. My email adress is kesari.van.balen@gmail.com  
> I'll be available for anyone. 
> 
> I know this chapter is not very interesting. You all know Lexa's story, but still, I think it's important.   
> Enjoy reading.

When they got home from their first school day, Anya had lots of homework to do. She sat on the kitchen table while Lexa sat next to her, typing on her laptop, and Niylah was fighting with her mother cause she wasn’t allowed to go to soccer practise. Anya heard Indra say something about doing homework to Niylah, but she didn’t pay much attention. 

They heard someone opening the door and Niylah ran to the hall. She hugged her daddy and started to talk enthusiastically about Lexa being in her class and punching Malcolm. Gustus didn’t understand so he asked Indra what happened. After his wife told him what happened, he complimented Lexa for standing up for herself and her sister. 

Gustus and Indra cooked dinner together while the girls finished their homework. They were all happy and talking but Anya noticed Lexa’s mind was somewhere else. She made a mental note to talk about it with her sister before bedtime. 

Since the girls had to go to school the next day, they had to go to bed early. When Niylah and Lexa were finished in the bathroom, Anya locked herself up in there to do her evening routine. She heard Indra saying goodnight to the younger girls and left the bathroom. She wished the woman goodnight and prepared for her talk with Lexa. 

“Lex, are you asleep?” Lexa turned around in her bed and sat upright. *What’s wrong?* Lexa looked at her sister. “You were acting different during dinner. Your mind was somewhere else. What’s bothering you, little sis?” Lexa didn’t answer. Instead, she laid down and turned her back to her sister. Anya walked over to the other side of the bed and looked at her sister. Tears made their way down Lexa’s face. She hold her pillow tight and tried not to tremble too much. 

Anya’s heart broke, seeing her sister that upset, because of her. She crawled into the bed next to her sister and held her. She soothed her until she stopped crying and trembling. “What’s going on, Lex? I’m sure we can fix it, whatever it is.” Lexa grabbed her notebook and started to write. 

 

_ I’m happy here, you’re happy here. I don’t want to ruin it for us. I know they promised they wouldn’t send us back but it’s not the first foster parent who promised that. I have to tell her about Alex but she’ll probably throw me out. I don’t know what to do, I don’t want to lie to her. She’ll eventually find out and if I don’t tell her first, she might get more angry.  _

 

Anya understood why her sister was scared. Her whole life, people judged her because of her male parts. God, even her own parents couldn’t accept it, they abandoned her because of it. “I think you should tell Indra. I don’t think she will send you back because of this.” Lexa nodded. *I’m going to talk to her tomorrow.* Anya fell asleep in her sister’s bed. Lexa felt safe, curled up into her sister’s side. Slowly, her eyes closed and she drifted off to sleep. 

The next day, Lexa had a hard time eating her breakfast. “You have school today, Lex. You have to eat something. Breakfast is important,” Indra told her. Lexa slowly ate everything Indra had put on her plate. She felt sick, not knowing what would happen when she told Indra. She didn’t realise she started to cry. Indra did notice and asked her what was wrong. Lexa couldn’t keep her food inside anymore and ran to the toilet. She fell on her knees and let it all out. Worried, Indra brought her water, her toothbrush and toothpaste. Lexa cleaned her mouth and flushed the toilet. Indra asked Lexa what was wrong but Lexa didn’t respond. Worried, Niylah wrapped her arm around Lexa, who surprisingly didn’t pull back, and soothed her. 

Indra didn’t know what to do. She decided to ask Anya if she knew what was wrong with her sister. “She needs to talk to you about something really important. She’s scared to death you will throw her out of the house when you know.” Anya looked a little scared at Indra. “No matter what happened, we won’t ever kick you out of the house. I don’t know how to make Lexa understand that.” Indra thought for a moment before she continued. “You think it is a good idea to let her stay home today? Maybe Lexa and I can bond a bit and she can tell me what’s wrong.” Anya nodded in agreement and begged the woman to listen to Lexa and take her time before making rushed decisions. Indra promised she would.

Indra and the three girls drove to Niylah and Lexa’s school. Niylah stepped out of the car, a sad look covering her face. “I’ll see you this afternoon?” Niylah asked Lexa. Lexa nodded hesitantly, still doubting if Indra would let her stay. 

They drove further to Anya’s school. Anya stepped out of the car and said them goodbye. “Get knocked down, get back up,” She said to her sister before walking away. Indra didn’t understand what Anya meant with that but Lexa seemed to know. They drove back home in silence. 

At home, Lexa wanted to go straight to her room but she was stopped by Indra. “Anya said you needed to talk to me.” She didn’t say anything but motioned for Lexa to come with her. She made them something to drink and lead them to the garden. They sat down by the water and neither of them said something. 

After 10 minutes, Indra walked away. Confused, Lexa stayed in the garden, waiting for the woman to return. Indra came back with Lexa’s notebook and a pen. “I want to know what’s wrong, Lex. I want to help you. Please let me help you.” Her eyes begged Lexa to explain what was wrong. Slowly, she picked up the pen and started to write. Half an hour later, she handed Indra the notebook. 

 

_ I don’t want to tell you this because I know it’ll ruin this. I know I won’t have a home after this but I am afraid you will find out by yourself and you will get even more mad at me. I finally feel safe and happy, Anya does too. I don’t want to ruin this for her so please, whatever you decide, don’t take this out on her.  _

 

When Indra read the words, she got even more concerned.  _ What could possibly be wrong that would make her think we would give up on her?  _ She continued reading.

 

_ I’m different, you probably already know that. Anya and I are biological siblings. I was born as Alexander Woods. For 5 years, my parents thought I was a boy but I never felt like one. It wasn’t that I wanted to play with barbies or something like that. I loved to play soccer, I always wore boys clothes, I wasn’t bothered by that. I just didn’t like it when people called me Alexander. Most people said Alex, which also can me a girl name so I was satisfied. I was really insecure about feeling like a girl so I never talked about it. Only Anya knew it and she helped me a lot. I fought a lot cause people would bully me and it made me feel even more insecure.  _

_ My teacher send me to the school’s psychologist who send me to Arizona Robbins, a pediatrician who would do some tests. The tests showed that I was born intersex. I have a penis but I also have two X chromosomes. They didn’t want a freak as a child. They tried to force me to act like a boy and they thought I was just asking for attention. When their threats didn’t help, they just ignored me. Arizona found out something about them being involved in money laundering. She blackmailed them in exchange for custody over me and Anya.  _

_ They faked my death and gave me to Arizona but they wanted to keep Anya. Arizona spend her whole life trying to save Anya too. She had an abusive boyfriend and in the end, he killed her. I gave her friend permission to release the evidence against them. I wanted revenge for Arizona and I got that. They ended up in jail but Anya ended up in foster care.  _

_ Two years later, we lived in the same foster home for a while but it wasn’t safe there. He was abusive and also arrested.  _

_ What I meant to explain is, I have a penis but I’m a girl. I got bullied because of it but luckily no one has found out at school yet. I know I’m not normal and I know you probably don’t want a freak as a child. I understand it if you want to send me back but please don’t send Anya away, this wasn’t her fault. Thank you for the amazing time I had here. You, Gustus and Niylah gave me a real family and I couldn’t be more happy with you.  _

 

With tears flowing down her face, Indra put the letter aside. When she looked at Lexa, something in her broke.  _ This girl has been through so much already. I won’t ever let someone hurt her,  _ She thought. Lexa sat in the chair, curled up to a ball, violently trembling. Indra saw tears flowing down her face. 

She bent over to Lexa and took the girl’s hands in hers. “Lexi, I understand why you were so scared but you don’t have to be. Not anymore. We won’t ever send you back. You and Anya are a part of the family now.” Indra smiled at the girl. Lexa looked hopefully at her. 

“To be honest,” Indra continued, “I already knew about your male parts.” Lexa looked at her questioningly and Indra explained further. “When you want to foster someone, you get a file about the person you want to foster. It has lots of information about someone like hobby’s, favorite food, allergies. You also get a copy of the medical history and special things like autism and ADHD are in it too. We already knew you were intersex before we took you in our family.” 

Lexa needed time to think. Five minutes, she didn’t make a move. Then she started to write again.  _ So you both knew before I came here and you didn’t care about it? It wasn’t a problem for you?   _ Indra shook her head.  _ So if you knew, why didn’t you say anything about it? Does Niylah know? “ _ We didn’t want to make you uncomfortable so we didn’t ask you about it,” Indra explained. “We hoped you would come talk to us when you were ready. We didn’t know it mattered so much to you, Lexa. Otherwise we would have reassured you a lot sooner that we won’t send you back because of this. We won’t ever send you back.” 

Lexa looked at Indra like the woman had given her the world. For Lexa, it sure felt like she had. *I love you.* She signed to Indra. *I love you more.* Indra signed back. Indra changed to her serious self and said one last thing to the younger girl. “If you’re ever struggling with something, please don’t hesitate to come talk to us. We will support you no matter what.” Lexa nodded and Indra stood up and walked inside the house. Halfway through the garden, she turned around and asked one last question. “Are you going to talk to Gus about this?” Lexa nodded again. “If you want me there, please let me know.” 

When Indra and Lexa picked Anya up from school, she ran worried to the car. “Is everything okay, Lex?” She asked her sister concerned. *Everything is alright.* Anya looked at Indra who confirmed it with a nod. “She told me” Indra said to Anya. “But I already knew.” Anya didn’t ask for an explanation and told the two about her second school day and her new friends. 

They picked up Niylah, who was concerned about her sister. “Please come back to school with me tomorrow, It was really boring without you,” she said with a smile. Lexa smiled back at her and replied. *I will come to school with you tomorrow.*

That evening, she explained everything to Gustus with Indra by her side. He was very supportive and told her she could always come to her when she had a problem. They explained it to Niylah too and she didn’t judge at all. “You’ll always be my big sister, this doesn’t change anything. And you’ll probably always be better than me at soccer, I don’t think this will change that either.” She said with a smile. 

In that moment, she was so happy, she forgot to not speak. “Thank you,” she said out loud. It were only two words but for Indra and Gustus, it meant the world. Lexa finally trusted them enough to talk to them. They knew not to expect her to talk more but they were still hopeful. They were happy as long as their three daughters were. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all the positive feedback. If you have anything to say, please try to say it in a nice way. Most of you do but I'd like to point it out anyway cause some don't.   
> You can't here a tone via internet. Because of that, it's important to think about how you write something. Maybe you don't mean something in a bad way, but the person who reads it doesn't know that.   
> Positive feedback gives you motivation. It makes you worry less about not being able to post a chapter that day cause people support you anyway. Please consider this when you write a comment, not just to me but to everyone. It makes a difference for the writers who try their very best to write a good story. 
> 
> I'm really happy with all the positive comments. I only have one day left before school starts but I'll try to post at least one chapter tomorrow. Love you all!
> 
> 2194 words


	17. Lexa's first soccer game

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexa's first soccer game.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Too much soccer, I'm really sorry. I got a little too enthusiastic and I didn't want to start over again cause it's still a part of Lexa's life. Sorry if you hate soccer. 
> 
> Enjoy reading

Every evening, Lexa said good night to her sister. Every morning, Lexa said good morning to everyone. That was if for now but her family was proud of her. Lexa was very good at signing. She learned fast and when Aliya was gone, she practised more signs using the internet. 

“Come on Lex! You seriously need to get up earlier next time.” Niylah was impatiently waiting for her sister to come downstairs for breakfast. Lexa came downstairs but didn’t eat anything. “Are you nervous for your first game?” Indra asked her. Lexa nodded. “You’ll do great, Lex. I’ve seen you at practise and you are so talented.” Indra looked at her with love in her eyes. Since Lexa had signed  ‘I love you’ to Indra, their bond became stronger and stronger. 

Indra gave her some french toast and orange juice. Lexa forced herself to eat and drink some and went upstairs to grab her bag. “Do you have everything?” Gustus asked her. *I think so,* Lexa replied. “soccer shoes?” *Yes* “shin guards?” *Yes* “a bottle of water?” *No, I forgot.* Gustus walked to the fridge and handed her a bottle of water. “deodorant?” *Yes* “I think that’s it,” Gustus said. “You shower at home, right?” Lexa nodded and put everything back in her bag. 

“Let’s go,” Indra said enthusiastically. They stepped into the car and Gustus drove them to the soccer field. Luckily, Lexa’s first game was a home match so they didn’t have to travel far. Lexa wasn’t that comfortable with her team yet but Niylah is always there for her. 

Lexa and Niylah sat in the team room.  They already had changed into their tenue at home so they were just waiting for the rest of the team. When everyone was finished, the coach came in. “Good morning girls,” Coach Jess greeted them. “Good morning coach Jess,” the team replied. “So, I have given you all a place. If you want another, please let me know and I’ll see if I can change anything. Niylah, you’re right back.” Niylah nodded, she hadn’t expected otherwise. “Lexa, do you want to try right center?” the coach asked her. Lexa nodded, she didn’t have a favorite spot so she didn’t really care. 

They did their warming up and practised some passes before the referee whistled and they all had to come to the center of the field. He gave them a short speech before sending them to their places. Lexa and Niylah were a good team and luckily they stood behind each other. This would be an interesting game. 

They played against The Flamekeepers, a good team but they didn’t play together, they all played on their own. Last game, they lost 4-5 cause their center forward got attacked by the defender of The Flamekeepers. 

The game began and immediately, The Flamekeepers ran off with the ball. Meredith, their defender, intercepted the ball and passed it to Niylah. Lexa was free and Niylah passed her the ball. Niylah ran forward and Lexa gave her the ball back. She walked to the defender’s place to cover for her. Niylah ran as fast as she could to the goal. A few meters before the keeper area, the passed the ball to the left forward. She walked into the keeper’s area and received the ball back. With a hard kick, she shot the ball towards the goal. The ball flew over the keeper’s hands. They all watched the ball flowing to the goal. Everyone was ready to cheer but unfortunately, the ball hit the bar and bounced back into the field. The center forward gave another kick but the ball was blocked by a defender. 

Halfway through the game, the left defender from The Grounders made a mistake. The right forward got through the defense with the ball and sprinted towards the goal. They dodged the center defender and kicked the ball. The ball hit the goal post and for a second, The Grounders were relieved. But a second player from The Flamekeepers shot the ball again. It flew past the keeper, into the net. The Flamekeepers and their audience cheered loudly. 

The rest of the 30 minutes playing time, nothing happened. Both teams tried to make a goal but neither of them had a good chance. Disappointed, The Grounders walked back to their team room. Lexa didn’t dare to look at Indra and Gustus. She practically ran to the team room without even acknowledge them. 

The second half was better. Lexa was playing center forward and Niylah was playing right forward. Hopefully, they would be able to score a goal. In the first 5 minutes, they already succeeded. 

Their center defender shot the ball over all players, to the other side of the field. Lexa ran to the ball and sprinted with it to the goal. Niylah ran with her, staying on her right side. A defender ran to Lexa and tried to block her but with a simple move, Lexa was past her. A second, way bigger, defender blocked her now. Lexa passed the ball to Niylah, who had free passage apart from the keeper. She shot the ball towards the goal but the keeper stumped the ball back in the field. She didn’t expect Lexa to sprint past the defender and shoot the ball again. Before the keeper could make a move, the ball hit the net. 

The Grounders were screaming and cheering. Both teams had one point. Lexa got a bit scared because of the screaming but Niylah was there. She wrapped and arm around her sister and told her everything was okay. 

The Grounders had found new energy to fight The Flamekeepers. The opposite team wasn’t happy about the equalizer. They played rough. A tackle here, a push over there. It wasn’t that bad until they came closer to the goal. The right forward had missed the shot on goal, the keeper catched the ball. Laying on the ground with the ball, the center forward “fell” on her and gave her a kick. The referee ran towards them and pulled them off each other. The Flamekeeper seemed fine but the keeper laid crying on the ground. Both teams got a break and went to the team rooms. 

“Her wrist is hurting, could be broken. She can’t continue,” coach Jess said to the rest of the team. “Who wants to be the keeper for the remaining time?” Jess asked. No one volunteered and they all looked at each other. No one said anything until someone raised her hand. “Great, Lexa you can be the goalie, Niylah you’ll be the center forward and Senna, you are the right forward,” the coach told them. They walked back to the field while Lexa stayed in the team room to change her tenue. 

“Lex, are you sure you want to do this? You don’t have to, you know that right?” Niylah asked concerned. *I’m sure. Why are you worried?* “I don’t want you to get hurt. They’ll probably try to attack you.” Niylah looked scared. *It’ll be fine.*

There were only 13 minutes to play. Lexa stood in front of the goal, focussing on the game. The Flamekeepers broke through the defense and took a shot at the goal but Lexa blocked it. She shot the ball to the other side of the field where Niylah picked it up. 

Niylah and the other forwards worked together and managed to score a goal. Everything now depended on Lexa and the defenders to make sure the opposite team wouldn’t make another goal. 

In the last five minutes, the game became tensive. The Flamekeepers were determined to score at least one other goal. They made lots of violations against players from The Grounders. 

The Flamekeepers again broke through the defense. The other defenders weren't fast enough and Lexa was the only obstacle between the attacker and the goal. The Flamekeeper shot the ball but Lexa managed to block it. The ball bounced back in the field, towards the Flamekeeper. The opponent took another shot. Lexa dove towards the ball but she missed it. The ball flew past her, into the goal. 

Disappointed in herself, Lexa continued the game. The Grounders had another chance but missed. The game ended 2-2. Both teams returned to their team rooms. “Girls, you’ve all played amazing. Last time we lost, this time it was draw, we will win next time.” The coach was proud of them but Lexa didn’t understand why. She failed, she should practise more. 

Everyone was out of the team room except for Lexa. Niylah came back for her and found her sister on the bench, curled up to a ball, sobbing. “What’s wrong Lexi?” Niylah asked her sister. *I failed,* Lexa replied. “You were amazing out there. The defense failed, you did the best you could. It doesn’t matter we didn’t win.” Niylah said to her. Lexa didn’t reply and Niylah figured it was because she didn’t know how to sign her response. Niylah handed her a notebook and pen and Lexa started to write.  _ But what if they don’t like me anymore. What if I’m not good enough?  _ “Lexi, they love you, no matter what. They want you to have fun while playing soccer, they don’t care if you win or lose. They wouldn’t care of you were so bad you couldn’t even shoot the ball. As long as you have fun, they support you.” Niylah hoped her words made Lexa worry a little less. Hesitantly, Lexa stood up and walked out of the team room, towards Anya, Indra and Gustus. 

Enthusiastic, Anya ran towards her sister and wrapped her in a hug. “You were so amazing out there, Lex.” She smiled at her sister but the smile faded when she saw her little sister had cried. “What’s wrong, Lex?” She looked concerned. Lexa shrugged and walked further with her head down. Quickly, Niylah explained the older sister what Lexa had told her in the team room. Anya nodded understandingly and joined the rest of the family. 

Indra and Gustus didn’t understand what was wrong with Lexa after she had played such an amazing game. “Honey, what’s wrong? You played amazing,” Indra asked her. Lexa couldn’t handle her anxiety anymore and started to cry. Indra wrapped an arm around her shoulder but Lexa flinched. Right now, she couldn’t handle to be touched, afraid for being hurt. Gustus asked the other sisters what happened. 

“She thinks she failed because she didn’t stop all the balls. She’s afraid you don’t like her anymore cause she’s not good enough for you,” Niylah explained. “Why wouldn’t she be good enough? She played amazing and it only matters to us if she has fun,” Gustus said confused. “When we were little, our parents would get mad if we didn’t win. They didn’t care about fun, they wanted to be the best in everything. We had to be the perfect, talented children. In foster homes, you usually don’t get treated well, I think she’s just scared cause everyone got made when she lost,” Anya explained. Gustus nodded and turned to Lexa. 

“Kiddo, we won’t ever reject you or get mad at you because you didn’t win. We are happy as long as you have fun. You are safe with us, we won’t ever hurt you. Especially not because you didn’t win.” Gustus hoped his words calmed the girl down. “And for the record, you totally kicked ass out there,” He said with a smile. 

After saying goodbye to the team, they returned home. On the way back, Gustus stopped at a parking lot and told the girls he had to pick something up. The four others waited in the car while Gustus picked the thing up. “What is it?” Indra asked when he returned. “It’s a surprise,” he said. No one asked further and they drove home in silence. 

At home, Niylah and Lexa went to shower while Indra, Gustus and Anya set up the surprise. Niylah was finished before her sister and walked downstairs. She saw what Gustus had planned and laughed.  _ I really have amazing parents.  _ She thought. 

When Lexa came downstairs, she was pulled into the kitchen. She smiled when she saw what Gustus had done. The kitchen was decorated with streamers and balloons in green and white, the colours of the soccer club. Gustus pointed at the kitchen table and Lexa’s smile grew even wider. Gustus had bought a cake and on it was written ‘Best soccer player on the ground’, also in green and white. *Thank you* she signed to Indra and Gustus. 

They ate cake and talked about the game. Anya was really happy that Indra and Gustus went to so much trouble just to make Lexa feel better. They really cared about the girls. Anya did wonder if it would always be like this but right now, she allowed herself to enjoy it while it lasted. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the support. School starts tomorrow :-( If I survive, you'll get a new chapter this week. 
> 
> 2150 words


	18. Tris

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anya has a talk with Indra. Don't know how to summarize the rest of the chapter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I survived my first school day so here as promised, a new chapter.  
> Sorry for all the mistakes, English is still my worst subject. 
> 
> Enjoy reading

Monday, everyone had to go to school and work again. Indra and Gustus had changed their schedules so one parent was always there in the mornings. One week, Indra was home in the mornings, the other week, Gustus was home in the mornings and working in the afternoon. This week, it was Gustus’ turn to bring the children to school.

“Hurry up girls,” Gustus shouted from the kitchen. Niylah, Lexa and Anya were still upstairs, doing their hair and packing their bags. After five minutes, Lexa was the first one to arrive in the kitchen. “Good morning kiddo,” Gustus greeted her. “Morning Gustus,” Lexa said with a yawn following. She sat down at the table and he put a plate in front of her. Hungry, she started to eat. Niylah and Anya came down for breakfast too. They ate in silence, trying to not fall back asleep.

Gustus dropped Lexa and Niylah off first and drove further to Anya’s school. “Have a nice day kid,” he said before driving away. Smiling, Anya headed to her first class. She didn’t have a busy day. No tests and mostly just making exercises and doing a group project.

During lunch, Tris asked if she wanted to make homework together that afternoon. “We can’t go to my place cause my mum is sick but maybe we can go to your place?” She proposed. Sad, Anya declined her offer.

Mr Kane was ill so they were allowed to go home after Biology. Anya called Indra, who worked home and the woman promised to be on her way. Anya saw Tris leaving with Lucy. Jealous, she was watching them.

She stepped in Indra’s car and they drove home in silence. Indra knew something was bothering the girl so she just asked what it was. “What’s going on kid?” Anya shrugged. “Nothing.” “I want to help you but I can’t do that if you don’t talk to me.” “Tris, my friend from school, asked me to hang out with her this afternoon. We couldn’t go to her house so she asked if we could go to my place.” Anya looked sad. “Does this home not feel like _your_ place?” Indra asked. “It’s not that. Sometimes it’s hard to believe it’s my place too but that’s not the problem.” “Then what is the problem?”

“Lexa gets really nervous when she meets new people. With her being intersex and being in foster homes, she is so insecure. When I first got in that foster home with Thelonius, she was hiding upstairs while I was meeting the other kids. I don’t want to make her uncomfortable but I really wanted to hang out with Tris. I feel like I have to choose between my sister and my friends and of course, I will always choose Lexa.”

Indra nodded understandingly. “Maybe you could talk to her about it. Let her adjust to a friend coming over. Don’t invite them all at once, just one friend at a time. Maybe she’ll be less scared then. You’re not alone in this anymore, Anya. Gustus and I are here to help you. And I believe Niylah will protect Lexa when you’re not around.”

“That’s a good idea, Indra. I’ll try that. Will you help me talking to her?” Anya asked. “Of course I will help you. You want to talk to her tonight?” “Yeah tonight is okay. Thank you.”

Anya stayed at home, doing her homework, while Indra went to pick up Niylah and Lexa from school. Lost in her thoughts, Anya didn’t even notice them coming back. Lexa ran towards her sister and showed her a test, happily jumping up and down. Anya grabbed the paper out of her sister’s hands and read what it was. “You have an A+ on your English test! That’s great Lex!” Anya was really happy for her sister.

Lexa had always trouble speaking and writing. She didn’t know why but it was already like that when she was little. Anya assumed it was because her parents didn’t talk much with her and never helped with homework. Anya always helped her but Lexa was nervous around other people and just couldn’t concentrate on her work. Anya was happy Lexa was a little more comfortable in the classroom. It probably helped a lot that Niylah sat beside her and calmed her down when she was anxious.

They hung her test on the fridge, next to Niylah’s accomplishments. Anya didn’t have any accomplishments to hang on the fridge but Indra said she was still proud of her and that made her smile.

Niylah and Lexa went to play soccer in the garden while Anya finished her homework. When Gustus came home, dinner was just ready. They sat down and ate while talking about their days.

“I have to go on a business trip in a few weeks,” Gustus announced. Niylah and Indra looked sad. They didn't like it when Gustus left. Anya and Lexa didn't understand. *You will come back, right?* Lexa asked. “Of course I will. I just don't know how long I'll be gone,” Gustus reassured her. “When do you leave?” Anya asked. “I leave this Friday. I'm sorry girls, I  can't watch your next soccer game,” Gustus apologized.

After dinner, Lexa went upstairs to read her book. Anya looked at Indra, who nodded at her. They walked to Anya and Lexa’s room, preparing for the talk. “Hi Lex. We want to talk with you for a minute, is that okay?” Indra asked. Lexa put her book aside and nodded.

Indra looked at Anya, encouraging her to talk to her sister. “I-I wanted to uhm ask you something,” Anya said. *What do you want to ask?* Lexa asked. “I’d like to invite a friend over some time and I was wondering if you would mind it if I did. I know you don’t like meeting new people and I’m not doing this to hurt you. It’s just that she is my friend and she wanted to hang out with me and I said no cause we couldn’t go to her place and and……”

“Ahn, you’re rambling,” Lexa said. Surprised, Anya stopped talking. Her sister was talking, which meant she was taking this serious and she understood how important this is for Anya. *I need time,* Lexa signed. Anya nodded, she didn’t know what to say. *What’s your friend’s name?* Lexa asked. Anya was happy her sister showed interest in her friends. “Her name is Tris. My other friends are Diana, Lucy, Argitas and Quint.” *Ask Tris if she wants to come next week.* “Are you sure?” Anya asked. She wanted to hang out with Tris but she didn’t want to push Lexa now she finally felt safe. *Yes I am sure.*

Gustus stayed home the rest of the week to spend time with his family. They went to the zoo and the cinema and he took them out for dinner. Thursday, they had a movie night and the girls were allowed to stay up all night.

When Lexa woke up Friday, Gustus had already left. He had said goodbye the night before and he left each girl and his wife a note.

Lexa got dressed and walked downstairs for breakfast. Niylah and Anya were already downstairs, eating. “Good morning,” Lexa greeted them. They mumbled something sounding like ‘Morning’ back. Indra handed her a plate with breakfast and Lexa ate her breakfast quickly. _Tris is coming Monday, right?_ She wrote down on a note and handed it to Anya. Anya nodded.

School wasn’t very interesting that day. Lexa was helping Niylah with her work, abandoning her own. “Lexa, you have to do your own work too,” Mr Evans said to her. _It’s too easy. I practise it when I explain it to Niylah and correct her exercises._ Lexa wrote in her notebook. “You want to do something else?” Her teacher asked. She nodded excited. “Can you and Niylah go to the library and ask for the music books? I need you to pick up 26 books.” Lexa nodded and pulled Niylah with her, in the direction of the library.

They had music lessons the whole afternoon. They had to sing songs and clap in the rhythm. Some children who played an instrument at home were allowed to play a song for the whole class.

At home, Niylah and Lexa practised all afternoon and evening for their game the next day. Since the opponent wasn’t very good, they would all get a place they had never played before. When Anya had finished her homework, she joined them and came up with some exercises to try.

Saturday, they won with 9 goals against 1. Happily but exhausted, they returned home. Sunday they did their homework and played on the Wii. That evening, it took a long time for Lexa to fall asleep. She was nervous for tomorrow. She really wanted to be the sister Anya deserved. She didn’t want to be scared for Tris. She wanted Tris to like her, she wanted Tris to like her family.

Monday morning, Lexa was up early. She was reading on the couch when Anya and Niylah came downstairs. “Morning Lex,” they greeted her. “Morning,” Lexa replied without taking her eyes of her book. Anya and Niylah ate their breakfast while Lexa continued reading.

When Anya finished her breakfast, she joined Lexa on the couch. *Did you tell Tris about me?* Lexa asked her sister. “Yeah, I explained you don’t talk, she didn’t have a problem with it,” Anya replied. Lexa nodded and continued reading.

At school, Lexa couldn’t concentrate. She was moving her legs and tapping with her fingers on the table. After a while, Niylah became irritated. “Lex stop moving!” She said to her sister. Shocked, Lexa stopped moving. *What’s wrong?* Lexa asked. “You’re nervous, why?” Niylah asked instead of answering. *Why do you think?* “You don’t have to be scared of Tris. She’s Anya’s friend and she’ll love you. Everything will be fine. Can you explain this to me now? Cause I need to pass this test, otherwise mom won’t stop whining about my grades.” _Weren’t you like super smart according to your mother?_ Lexa wrote down in her notebook and showed to Niylah. “Yeah, she thought so before you came and showed her your grades.” Niylah laughed. Lexa laughed too and explained the exercises.

 

Anya  
“Are we still up for this afternoon?” Tris asked Anya during lunch. “Yep!” Anya replied enthusiastically. She was really looking forward to this afternoon. “So, why couldn’t we go to your place the other day?” Tris asked. “I uhmmmm I-I.” Anya didn’t know what to say. “You told me your sister doesn’t talk, it that why? Cause if you’re ashamed of it, you don’t have to be.” Tris looked at Anya, who was staring at the ground. “Can we go talk somewhere more private?” Anya asked. Tris nodded and stood up. When they found a good spot, they sat down and Anya started to explain.

“Lexa and I are foster kids. In a former foster home, something bad happened to Lexa. She always had been scared of people but it only got worse after that. She’s scared for almost everyone now. She has agreed with meeting you but she barely slept last night and she was super nervous this morning. She thinks no one notices but I’m her sister, I do notice.”

“If you want to cancel, that’s okay. I know your sister is important to you and I don’t want to make her uncomfortable.” Anya felt really guilty. Tris was the perfect friend. “I don’t want to cancel, I’m just a bit worried,” Anya replied. “It’ll be okay. I’ll try my very best to not scare her too much, okay?” Tris looked at Anya, waiting for an answer. “Okay.”

That afternoon, Tris and Anya drove home with Indra. In the car, Indra was asking questions to get to know Tris. Anya learned new things about Tris too like her pets and stuff. Things they didn’t even think about asking each other.

Indra parked before their house and they stepped out of the car. Nervous, Anya looked at Tris. Tris looked back with a calm face and a smile. Suddenly, Anya didn’t feel nervous anymore. She had the best friend she could ever wish for. Tris didn’t judge and even tried to learn some things in sign language, (she failed). Tris would try to make Lexa comfortable and Lexa would see how amazing Tris is. It would be okay cause even if things went wrong today, Anya knew Tris would still want to be her friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the support. I'm so happy with all the hits, comments and kudos.  
> In the following chapters, more things will be described from Anya's POV. She's an important character in the story so I wanted to show things from her POV.  
> I hope you enjoyed reading. 
> 
> 2100 words


	19. Visitors

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tris visits the Forrest family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoy reading. Sorry for any mistakes.

Lexa  
When Lexa came home from school, she was restless. She was too nervous to sit still so she was tapping and moving and it annoyed everyone in the living room but no one complained. Indra and Niylah knew Lexa was just nervous cause Anya’s friend was coming over. After a while, Lexa went upstairs. Niylah and Indra didn’t ask her what she was going to do, they understood she needed space. 

Ten minutes later, Lexa came back in her soccer jersey. “Lex, why are you wearing your jersey? You know we don’t have practise today right?” Niylah looked at her sister questioningly. Lexa looked like she was about to cry. Indra asked her to sit down and said it was okay to wear her soccer jersey. “Why don’t you go play piano? Anya has a new piano book with lots of new songs,” Indra proposed. Lexa nodded and walked to the music room. 

“Niy, you have to be more careful with what you say. She just wanted to wear something she’s comfortable in. She’s so proud to be on the team. Lexa is really nervous to meet Tris, she doesn’t want to scare Anya’s friend away.” Indra looked at her daughter to see if she understood. 

“I didn’t mean to hurt her, mom,” Niylah said. “I know honey, but you need to see things from her perspective. She’s been through a lot and she just deals with things differently.” Niylah nodded and walked to the music room to apologise to her sister. 

Fifteen minutes later, Niylah and Lexa came downstairs smiling. They sat down on the couch and watched a series on netflix. Indra went to the store to buy something to drink and a snack and went to pick Anya and Tris up from school when she came back. 

 

Anya   
Indra opened the front door and they walked through the hall. Tris and Anya hung up their coats and walked to the living room. Niylah and Lexa were sitting on the couch, watching netflix. “Niylah, Lexa, this is my friend Tris,” Anya introduced her friend. “Tris, meet my sisters, Niylah and Lexa.” “Hi,” Tris greeted them. Niylah greeted her back, Lexa just stared at her. “Come sit down,” Indra invited her. “Do you want anything to drink?” Anya asked her friend. Anya gave anyone a drink and Indra gave anyone a piece of cake. 

“Do you have any siblings?” Niylah asked Tris. “No I don’t. I’d love to have a sibling but my parents don’t want more children,” Tris answered. Apparently Niylah took her answer as a sign to ask more questions. “Do you have pets? And do you play sports?” Niylah wanted to ask more but Indra cut her off. “One question at a time, Niy.” 

Tris chuckled and answered the younger girl’s questions. “I have a cat but I’d rather have a dog. I play basketball on the school’s team.” “Cool! We don’t have any pets cause mom and dad don’t have time to look after a pet. I play soccer. I’m on the same team as Lexa but she’s way better than me. We score a lot of goals together.” Niylah started rambling and Anya was amazed how carefully Tris was listening. She asked lots of questions and didn’t care that Niylah’s stories were very difficult to understand. 

 

Tris   
Anya’s sisters were adorable. Once again. Tris noticed how much she missed in her life. She was an only child and her parents weren’t home that often. Tris noticed Lexa was listening carefully to the conversation but she was also trembling. 

“You’re a soccer fan? Which club is your favorite?” Tris asked Lexa. *I have no…..* Lexa signed. She didn’t know the sign for soccer club but it didn’t matter cause Tris didn’t know sign language. “She doesn’t have a favorite club,” Anya translated for her friend. I suck at playing soccer but I can play other sports. Lexa didn’t know what to say. She liked Tris, she really did. She wanted Anya’s friend to feel welcome and comfortable but she didn’t know how to do that. 

“Maybe you can teach me to play soccer sometime,” Tris suggested. Lexa’s face lit up. *Now?* She asked, looking at Anya to translate it for her friend. “You want to learn playing soccer right now?” Anya asked Tris. “Sure,” Tris answered. Excited, Lexa stood up and ran to her room. A few moments later, she came back with soccer shoes and shin guards for Niylah, Tris, Anya and herself. They went to the mini soccer field in the garden and Lexa started to explain how to kick the ball with Niylah’s help. 

Lexa signed and pointed how to shoot while Niylah explained it with words. “You shouldn’t kick the ball with the tip of your foot. That way, you can’t direct the ball in the direction you want and it hurts your toes.” Tris nodded and they continued explaining. “You have to kick the ball with your instep. If you want the ball to go up, you hit the ball at the bottom. If you want the ball to go straight ahead, you hit the ball in the middle.”

Tris nodded and tried some kicks. The first six times she tried to kick the ball to Lexa, she failed miserably. The seventh one was slightly better. Slowly, she got better at shooting and targeting. When she could kick the ball in the right direction, they moved on to dodging an opponent and scoring goals. After that, they taught Tris to defense and pick the ball back when the opponent has the ball. Tris was pretty good at playing soccer but she would never give up basketball. 

The girls decided to play a game against each other. Anya and Niylah against Tris and Lexa. While Tris was distracting Anya on the field, Lexa made her move and shot on the goal. Unfortunately, Niylah blocked it and ran to their goal. Niylah made the mistake to shoot the ball to Anya, who wasn’t paying attention, and Tris ran away with the ball. Anya chased her but Tris passed the ball to Lexa. Lexa acted like she was going to shoot the ball but in the last moment, she ran to the left side and the goal was free. She shot and scored. 

Cheering, Tris and Lexa ran back to their half of the field. They played until Indra called them for dinner. Exhausted and sweaty, the kids sat at the table. Indra had cooked chicken with potatoes and vegetables. “I’m sorry, it’s nothing special but I hope you enjoy it anyway,” Indra apologised to Tris. “Mmmmm this is amazing Mrs Forrest,” Tris complimented the cook. “Thank you Tris. Please, just call me Indra.” 

After dinner, they all helped cleaning up the kitchen and table. “You’re our guest, Tris. You don’t have to do the dishes,” Indra complained. Tris didn’t listen and continued doing the dishes. Indra made the dessert, which was delicious too, according to Tris. 

They all sat on the couch. The kids were playing on the Wii while Indra was reading something for her work. They all looked up surprised when the doorbell rang. “Is one of your parents coming to pick you up?” Indra asked. “Yeah but I would send them a text when they could pick me up,” Tris responded. 

Indra opened the door and came back with Aliya. “Shit! Totally forgot it,” Anya said. Tris looked at her friend confused. “We have lessons for sign language every evening after dinner,” Anya explained. “Oh okay,” Tris said, “I can ask my father to pick me up.” “That’s not necessary,“ Indra said. “It doesn’t take much longer than half an hour and if you want, you can try it too.” Tris and Anya looked at each other and bursted out in laughter. “What was funny about that?” Indra looked confused. When Tris finally stopped laughing, she explained it. “Anya tried to teach me some basic signs after she told me her sister doesn’t speak. I practised for hours but I’m just not good at it. Half the time, I was signing the wrong things and it really didn’t work.” 

It took some time for Indra, who was a badass lawyer, to get Tris to try it but finally, Tris agreed. They sat down on the couch and Aliya started to sign, slowly this time, following their daily routine.    
*How are you today, Forrest family?*   
*We’re fine, thank you. How are you Aliya?*   
*I’m fine too, thank you for asking.*   
They asked each other a few questions and everyone told about their days. Anya, Indra and Aliya talked while signing so Tris would understand. 

*Hi, I’m Aliya. Who are you?* Aliya asked Tris. Then she showed her how to sign her response. 

*Hi, my name is Tris.* She didn’t sign it the wrong way, it was just messy. Luckily, Aliya had lots of experience. In the half an hour she was there, she managed to teach Tris some basic signs and teach the Forrest family a few new signs too. 

At 8 PM, Tris’ father came to pick her up. He came inside for a cup of coffee and a chat with Indra while the kids played another soccer game outside. Indra liked Tris’ father a lot. He was a wise man and he knew much about laws. “I’m a detective,” he explained, “I work for the SVU department.” 

Half an hour later, Tris’ father joined them in the garden. He and Anya played soccer against Niylah, Tris and Lexa. Lexa and Niylah were too good to defeat and Tris was doing well too. Her father was surprised his daughter could play soccer. “Lexa and Niylah taught me how to play soccer today,” Tris explained to her dad. “They did a good job then,” Tris’ father said laughing. “I remember that one time you played in a tournament with your classmates.” “No dad, please do not continue!” Tris begged. 

“What happened?” Anya asked. “Let’s just say she wasn’t the best on the team. In the last half, she stood by the opponent’s goal. Someone shot the ball and she got a chance to score. The goalie lay on the ground and no one stood between Tris and the goal. She shot the ball but lost her balance while shooting. The ball rolled next to the goal and Tris ended up with a sprained ankle.” They all laughed and Tris was as red, if possible even more, as a tomato. Still laughing, they continued their game. 

It was time for Tris to leave. They all said goodbye and Anya agreed to meet her at school the next day. Niylah and Lexa had to go to bed already but Anya was allowed to stay up a little longer since she didn’t have to be early at school the next day. 

At 10.15 PM, Lexa came downstairs again. “What’s wrong honey?” Indra asked her. “Can you not sleep?” Lexa nodded and sat down on the couch, between Indra and her sister. *I want to ask you something.* She said to Indra. “You can ask me everything,” Indra encouraged her. *Can we have a dog?* “How did you get the idea to take a dog?” Indra asked instead of answering. Lexa grabbed her notebook, too tired to sign. 

_ I want to have a friend. One that doesn’t judge. I’ve wanted one for a long time but it’s not fair for a dog to live in a foster home. I pushed away the thought about it but now Tris was talking about it, I just can’t forget it again. I need someone who won’t judge, who will always be there.  _

Indra nodded, thinking about how to respond. “Does this feel different than a foster home?” She asked the younger girl. Lexa nodded and wrote her further response down.  _ This feels like home. I kinda begin to understand I don’t have to leave here anymore. I’ve never dared to ask this and I know it’s a lot but I’ve saved some money and when I’m eighteen, I get some money from Arizona. I can pay you back for everything. _

Lexa wanted to continue writing but Indra grabbed the pen out of her hands. “You don’t have to pay anything if we get a pet, honey.” She said. “I have to discuss this with Gustus and when he agrees, Anya and Niylah have to be okay with it too. I’ll talk with him when he gets back, okay?” Excited, Lexa nodded. “Don’t get too happy, lex. It’s possible he’ll say no.” *I know but I have a small chance.* Lexa said good night and went to bed. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all the kudos, hits, comments and support. I know I say this every time but I'm still amazed by how many people comment and have seen(?) the story.(I don't know how they count the hits).
> 
> A special thank you to [bdasswarrior](http://archiveofourown.org/users/bdasswarrior/pseuds/bdasswarrior)  
> for all her fantastic ideas for the story and her support. You're amazing <3
> 
> 2112 words


	20. Trust

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This story is more about Tris and Anya. I hope you still like it.   
> Enjoy reading

Tuesday morning, Lexa asked Indra again about the dog. I have to ask Gustus about it, Lex!” Indra said. *Anya and Niylah?* Lexa was determined to persuade Anya and Niylah first so they would support the plan when Indra talked to Gustus. “What about us?” Niylah asked when she and Anya came downstairs. “Noting” *Dog* Indra and Lexa said and signed at the same time. 

“Lexa wants a dog and your mother is thinking about it,” Anya explained to Niylah. “I am not thinking about it, I said I would discuss it with Gustus!” Indra complained. “We’re getting a dog!” Niylah cheered. Anya and Lexa cheered with her, making a lot of noise. “STOP IT NOW!” Indra screamed. Right after she did that, she realised she shouldn’t have. 

Lexa dove to the ground and curled up to a ball. She covered her ears with her hands and rocked herself back and forth. She held her eyes closed, trying to disappear. 

“I’m sorry.” Indra wanted to walk over to Lexa but Niylah stopped her while Anya tried to calm her sister down. “You have to let her calm down. You can’t just scare her and make everything good by saying sorry,” Niylah said to her mother. She knew her mother didn’t mean to scare Lexa but right now, she had to protect her sister because Lexa couldn’t protect herself and she needed to feel safe. 

Indra nodded but didn’t walk away. She tried to find the right words. “I-I didn’t mean to scare her. I just didn’t want you to look forward to getting a dog cause we have to see if your father even wants a dog. We need to have enough time for a dog.” “We understand that mom,” Niylah said, “But you didn’t have to scream. You did and you scared your daughter.” 

Indra nodded and walked away. When Niylah turned around, she saw Anya holding her sister in her arms. Lexa was crying and trembling and her face showed nothing but fear. “I’ll take her to her room, she’ll feel safer there,” Anya said. “Do you need anything?” Niylah asked the older girl. “No, thanks. We’ll be fine.” 

They were all in their own rooms. Indra was crying in hers. She tried to call Gustus but he didn’t pick up his phone. Niylah was calling the school, telling her teacher what happened. Her teacher wanted a meeting with her parents later, but promised he would let Anya’s teacher know the girl wouldn’t come to school that day. 

Anya and Lexa laid on Lexa’s bed in their room. Lexa was still scared. This house was her safe haven. The first place she learned to communicate again. The first place she knew she had a family, after years without one. The first place she had parents who were proud of her. Lexa felt safe in this house, where no one had ever tried to hurt her. She had put the bad memories away. Everything came back when she heard the person who was the closest to a mother in her life scream. 

Lexa started to tremble more violent and she started to mumble incoherently. “They scream….mad….go away….” “Lexi, you are safe here. I won’t let anyone hurt you. Indra isn’t mad. No one is mad. We don’t have to leave again. We are safe here.” 

Anya was desperate. She wanted to help her sister. She needed her sister to feel safe. All that time, she had leaned so much on Indra, she needed the woman right now. She couldn’t help her sister and she was desperate. Crying, she held her sister, hoping she would calm down at some point. 

Forty five minutes later, Indra knocked on their door. “Can I come in?” She asked. Indra waited for a few minutes but she didn’t get an answer. She heard someone crying inside. She knew not to invade their space but Indra couldn’t let her girls alone when they were sad. She wanted to comfort them and let them know they wouldn’t have to leave. That she would never scream at them anymore. 

When she walked into their room, her heart broke. Lexa was laying in her sister’s arms, fear in her eyes, crying, trembling. She held her sister firmly, afraid Anya would leave her alone. Anya was crying. Indra saw in the older girls eyes she couldn’t handle this anymore. She walked over to them and wanted to wrap her arms around them but Lexa started to squeal. “I won’t hurt you, Lex. You are my kid and I won’t ever hurt you.” Indra hoped her words would help the girl. 

Lexa wanted so desperately to run away but when she looked into Indra’s eyes, she saw what she was looking for all those years. The woman looked at her with all the love she had. She looked at the sisters like they gave her the world. Indra treated them like they were her own children. She cared more for them than their parents ever had. 

Lexa thought about Arizona.  _ She would want me to be happy. She wouldn’t want me to threw away my last chance. Anya’s chance.  _

Instead of running away, she did the exact opposite. She let go of Anya and wrapped her arms around Indra. This woman gave her everything. This woman gave her a family. It was time she gave the woman what she deserved too. 

Surprised, Indra pulled Anya in their hug too. The older girl was surprised her sister let Indra touch her, let alone hug the woman, but at the same time, she was incredibly proud. She wrapped her arms firmly around Indra and Lexa. For a few minutes they hugged each other, then Lexa let go and sat shy back next to Anya. 

“I’m really sorry I scared you, Lexa. It was never my intention to do so. I just didn’t want you to get disappointed if we wouldn’t get a dog. I want you to be happy.” Indra wanted to say more but she was cut off by Anya. 

“She knows you didn’t mean to scare her. I know and Niylah knows. Just, next time, try to talk instead of scream. Screaming has a different meaning for us than it has for you.” 

Indra nodded. “I want you to feel safe here. This is your home. No matter what happens, this will always be your home.” Anya smiled. 

Niylah came into their room and asked if everything was sorted out. They all nodded. “I’ve told Mr. Evans what happened. He wants to talk to you later but he informed Anya’s teacher and we don’t have to go to school today. 

“Can he even do that?” Anya asked surprised. “Do what?” Niylah asked. “Telling my teacher I can’t come to school. He’s not my parent or guardian.” “He told what happened. Since he’s our teacher,” Niylah pointed at Lexa and herself, “he can give them information and well, I don’t know how it works but yes, he’s allowed to do that.” 

“Niylah and Ninemae went to different schools for a year cause their former teacher thought it was better for them. When Ninemae…. her teacher talked to Niylah’s and took away lots of our worries.” Indra explained. “In family related things, teachers are allowed to inform other teachers, even if they are from different schools.” 

They went out for lunch, chatting about light subjects. “Do you have a game this saturday?” Anya asked Niylah and Lexa. *Yes, I’m going to play center forward. If we win, we get ice cream.* “I’m sure you will both play an amazing game,” Anya said. “If you lose, you’ll get ice cream from Indra,” Anya promised. Niylah looked at her mother for confirmation, who nodded with a chuckle. 

*If you want you can invite Tris to the game.* Lexa looked at her sister. Anya started to smile without noticing it herself and nodded enthusiastically. “I’m sure she would love to come.” Indra paid for their lunch and they left the restaurant. 

The next day, Anya announced Tris would come to the game saturday. “She really wants to see you two play a real game,” Anya said. Excited, Lexa and Niylah practised every afternoon after school, determined to impress their sister’s friend by winning the game. 

Thursday, Tris came back home with Anya again. Lexa was still a little uncomfortable around the girl but she also liked it that Anya finally had a friend. She was trying to interact with Tris and with her family’s help, she managed. They all did their homework at the kitchen table while chatting and laughing with each other. 

Suddenly, they heard a knock on the door. “Is daddy coming home today mom?” Niylah asked excited. “I don’t think so honey, he’s still busy with work,” Indra replied. The older woman went to open the door and came back, followed by two loud talking and giggling girls.

Immediately, Lexa curled up to a ball and covered her ears with her hands. She wasn’t scared, she just didn’t like the noise. When Anya saw who walked into the kitchen, her anger took over. “What the hell are you doing here? You have no right to just invite yourself here.” Shocked, Lucy and Diana stood still. “Tris is here too. We just want to hang out with our friend. Calm down, Ahn,” Diana said. 

Tris stood up too and walked over to them. She motioned for them to follow her and they continued their talk in the hall. “Anya’s sister is uncomfortable when there are lots of people in the house. You can’t just come here unannounced.” Remembering she hadn’t made an appointment either, she quickly added another sentence. “Especially when she doesn’t know you.” “So you’re just dumping us? We can never hang out with you and now you have a new friend, suddenly you can hang out with other people?” Diana was getting angry now. Out of nowhere, Tris exploded. 

“YOU KNOW DAMN WELL WHY I HARDLY EVER HANG OUT WITH YOU. I CAN’T FUCKING HELP IT MY MOTHER IS SICK. I HAVE TO LOOK AFTER HER AND YOU KNOW THAT. WHAT KIND OF FRIEND ARE YOU? TREATING YOUR FRIEND LIKE SHIT ONLY CAUSE YOU DON’T GET ENOUGH ATTENTION. I’VE SPENT MY ENTIRE AFTERNOON WITH YOU SUNDAY. WASN’T THAT HANGING OUT WITH YOU? WASN’T THAT ENOUGH FOR YOU?” 

Tris rushed pass Diana and Lucy and ran out of the house. Offended, Diana left the house too. She looked at Lucy to see if she would follow but Lucy shook her head and looked away. “I’m really sorry for causing trouble. I didn’t know Diana would do this. She told me she just wanted to spend time with you, I had no idea she would hurt Tris like that,” Lucy said. “It’s okay, it’s not your fault. What’s going in with Tris’ mother?” Anya asked. “She has a muscle disease. Sometimes she can’t move at all, sometimes only a part of her body. It’s different every day and she can’t work that much. Tris’ father works a lot to pay everything. The insurance company doesn’t cover every medical bill. Tris has to take care of her mother after school when her father is working,” Lucy explained. 

“I had no idea she was dealing with so much. If I had known, I would’ve helped her,” Anya said. “I think right now, we shouldn’t waste time on feeling guilty. I think it’s better if we try to find her and apologise.” Anya agreed with Lucy and they walked back to the kitchen. 

“Indra, this is my friend Lucy. Lucy, this is Indra,” Anya introduced them. “We want to go to Tris’ house, can you drive us?” Anya asked the older woman. “Sure, what’s going on?” Indra asked curiously. “Some trouble between another friend and Tris. The other friend, Diana, said some things she shouldn’t have and she hurt Tris with it.” Anya didn’t feel like she should tell Indra about Tris’ mother. It was not her place to tell and maybe Tris didn’t want Indra to know and if so, Anya would respect that. 

Lucy knew where Tris lived and twenty minutes later, they stood in front of Tris’ house. The three of them stepped out of the car and walked to the front door. Lucy knocked and Tris’ father opened the door. “I already figured you might visit,” he said. “Tris told me what happened.”

They walked into the living room where they saw Tris, curled up to her mother’s side. She looked like she had been crying. “Hi,” Tris’ mother greeted them. “I’m Sylvia.” They all introduced themselves and sat down on the couch. They talked about what happened, Tris was just listening, not saying anything. After a while, she joined the people on the couch, sitting next to Anya. Anya wrapped an arm around her friend and hugged her. “I’m here for you. I wasn’t a good friend but I’m here now,” she said. Tris hugged her back, not knowing how to respond. 

Tris and her parents told them about their problems at home. Tris promised her friends to talk to them more often. Lucy apologised too, even though she didn’t do anything wrong. “If you ever need something, just let us know,” Indra told them. 

Anya told the others about the problems with Lexa. Lucy now understood why Anya got so angry and apologised. Anya promised she would talk with Lexa about meeting Lucy. After saying goodbye, Indra brought Lucy home and drove to their own home. 

Niylah was still up when they got home. Suddenly, Anya realised she left Lexa all alone. Feeling guilty, she wanted to go to her sister and apologise but Niylah stopped her. “She’s okay and she’s asleep,” the youngest girl said. “She missed you but mom and I calmed her down and she understood that Tris needed you more in that moment.” “Thanks for looking after her,” Anya said. 

Exhausted, they all went to bed. Anya crawled into her own bed and tried to fall asleep when she felt another body laying down next to her. She turned around and Lexa snuggled into her. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there, Lexi,” Anya whispered. Lexa snuggled in even closer and relaxed in her sister’s arms. “I love you Ahn.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, thanks for the support. You're all amazing <3  
> I'll probably update tomorrow or sunday. 
> 
> NEXT CHAPTER: Tris comes to Lexa and Niylah's soccer game. More about the dog. 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed reading. It was probably not what you expected. TBH it wasn't what I had in mind either. I just came up with it and wrote it down. 
> 
> 2385 words


	21. (un)happiness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tris comes to Lexa and Niylah's soccer game.   
> More talking about the dog.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter isn't very special and there isn't happening much but they deserve some happiness.   
> I (still) don't know how I'm going to continue the story so I have no idea if there will be more angst or more happiness. The next chapter will be posted as soon as possible. 
> 
> Enjoy reading!

Saturday morning, Lexa and Niylah got up early and practised soccer in the garden. When Indra was in her office, working on a case. When Anya came downstairs, Niylah and Lexa had been practising for over an hour. She made them breakfast and something to drink and called them. 

“Are you nervous for the game?” Anya asked them when they were sitting at the kitchen table. “A little,” Niylah replied. *Tris is coming.* Lexa answered. “It’s not like if you lose the game she won’t like you anymore, Lex,” Anya said. “She’s coming to the game cause she likes you and she’s my friend and she knows it’ll make the both of you happy.” 

*We’re still going to win,* Lexa persisted. “I’m sure you will,” Anya replied. “Is Tris driving with us or is she coming to the club on her own?” Niylah asked. “She’s driving with us. She said she would be here at 9.30 so we can be at the club around 10 AM.” 

Lexa and Niylah had packed their bags and sat outside, waiting for Tris to arrive. Finally, they saw Tris walking over to them. “Hi, I’m sorry it took so long,” Tris greeted them. “It’s fine,” Niylah said, “You’re only two minutes late. Did you come here by foot?” Niylah asked. “No, I took the bus but the last station is a five minute walk from here,” Tris replied. 

Indra came outside and heard Tris’ last words. “Honey, you could’ve called. We would have picked you up at home,” Indra said. “My father said he would drive me but my mother fell of the stairs this morning and he had to look after her.” Ashamed, Tris bend her head and stared at the ground. Anya wrapped her arms around her friend and told her it was okay. “You don’t have to be ashamed, Tris. You can always call if you need anything,” Niylah said. Tris thanked them and they all stepped into the car. 

Lexa and Niylah were doing their warming-up while Indra, Anya and Tris were sitting on the stand. They were talking about Tris’ mother and how she was holding up. “If you ever need anything, just let us know. We can help you and if you need a place to stay, we always have a room for you,” Indra said. Her words made Tris almost cry. 

Their game against Floukru began. Floukru was a strong team but The Grounders were even better. They played their game together and managed to score two goals in the first half while Floukru only had one chance to score and missed, thanks to the keeper. 

The second half, however, was completely different. Floukru had a new tactic. They put two man on the best players from the opposite team, including Lexa and Niylah. The rest of the players played well together and managed to score a goal. When the coach decided to put Niylah in the defense, The Grounders had little chance to score another goal. 

Floukru scored another goal, making the score even. Determined to make Tris proud, Lexa was all over the field. She was causing the opponent team to not be able to fully concentrate, which resulted in a few chances to score. Unfortunately, none of them resulted in a goal. 

With 7 minutes left, Niylah stole the ball from an opponent and shot it over the midfield, straight into Lexa’s run. Lexa ran to the ball, kicking it to her right, where the right forward picked the ball up. They ran towards the goal, followed by three defenders. The right forward passes the ball back to Lexa, who was ready to kick the ball into the goal. She was about to shoot when she suddenly lay on the ground. A sharp pain shot through her knee. 

Niylah ran to her sister, scolding at the girl who knocked her down. The Grounders stood around the referee, shouting he should ban her from the field. “Calm down everyone!” He ordered. The Grounders got a penalty while Lexa was carried of the field. 

When Lexa reached her family, she was met with a worried Gustus. “What are you doing here?” She asked him surprised. “I thought you were on a business trip.” “I wanted to surprise you and Niylah. I wouldn’t want to miss your game.” Gustus smiled at her. 

Niylah refused to play further, worried about her sister. The whole family and Tris went with Lexa to the hospital. A doctor made some scans and came back with the results half an hour later. “The good new is that you haven’t broken anything,” he said. “The bad news is, you have sprained your knee string. You will have to rest for at least two weeks and walk with crutches.” Lexa looked like she was going to cry. “No soccer for two weeks?” She asked with a sad face. “When it’s healed, you have to take it easy,” the doctor said. “No soccer for at least a month. I’m sorry.” With that, he walked out of the room. A nurse came in and taped her knee. She handed her crutches and told her to make an appointment for two weeks later. 

They drove home in silence, not knowing how to comfort the sad girl. When Lexa stepped out of the car, Anya wanted to help her but Lexa snapped at her. “I’m not invalid, I can walk by myself!” 

Everyone went to bed, hoping Lexa would feel better the next day. Of course she wouldn’t. Lexa hated not moving and doing nothing all day. Her team came by to see if she was okay. Their keeper had taken the penalty and scored. After that, they had defensed their goal with their lives. They had won 2-3 but they didn’t want to celebrate. Lexa was happy that they won but she couldn’t hide her sadness about not being able to move properly. They brought her lots of get well cards and candy but Lexa put it aside and didn’t look at it. Her teammates left and Lexa curled up on the couch, watching netflix all day. 

That evening, when their daughters were upstairs, Indra and Gustus sat on the couch, talking about adult stuff. “I hope Lexa will feel better,” Gustus said. “Yeah, me too. She hates it that she can’t play soccer,” Indra agreed with her husband. “Lexa asked me if we could get a dog,” Indra said. “She’d been asking about it for days and then Niylah and Anya heard it and they were cheering that hey would get a dog and I screamed at them to stop.” “I assume that didn’t go well,” Gustus replied. “She got scared and it took her a while to calm down. I thought she would run away but she didn’t. She hugged me and I apologised and we’re good now.” 

“I’m happy she’s not scared of us,” Gustus said. “We’re you screaming because you don’t want a dog?” He asked Indra. “It’s not that,” Indra answered. “I wanted to discuss it with you first and I just didn’t want her to be happy and get disappointed if we wouldn’t get a dog.” 

“Do you want a dog?” Gustus asked curiously. “I don’t know. We’re not home that often but I think the girls would love it and it could be fun.” Indra was in two minds. “What do you think?” She asked Gustus. “I think it would be good for our family. I’m sure our daughters will love it and we can change our schedules. I was thinking about working less hours anyway. I don’t like being far away from my family for so long.” 

Indra smiled at him. “It’s not like we need that much money,” she chuckled. “I can work less hours too. We can spend more time with our kids. We do have to talk with the kids about taking care of the dog and lots of other things before we take one.” Gustus agreed. Satisfied, they went to bed, deciding they would tell their girls the good news tomorrow. 

Monday morning, Lexa sat at the kitchen table, eating her breakfast, with a sad voice. She had to go to school today, with her crutches, and she really didn’t want to go. Indra and Gustus were waiting for Anya to come downstairs. They wanted to tell the good news when all girls were there. When Anya finally came to the kitchen, Indra called Niylah, who was watching TV, to the kitchen. 

“We want to talk to you about something,” Indra began. “Gosh, what did we do wrong this time?” Niylah joked. “Ha-ha,” Gustus said. “If you can be quiet for a few minutes, we can tell you our good news.” “Are you pregnant?” Niylah asked excited. “Niylah, please be quiet. No I’m not pregnant but I think you’ll like this even more.” Indra looked at her daughter with a smile on her face. 

Gustus saw in Lexa’s eyes that she already knew what it was about. He smiled at her and she gave him a big smile back. “We’re thinking about taking a dog…” Indra wanted to finish her sentence but Anya and Niylah were cheering loudly and the three girls were hugging each other. “We do have a few things to discuss with you first,” Gustus said when the girls had calmed down. 

Indra mentioned they had to leave for school if they didn’t want to be late and they decided to continue their conversation after school. Excited, Niylah, Lexa and Anya were talking about what kind of dog they wanted. 

“I want a big, cool dog.” Niylah said. “I want a labrador!” Anya said enthusiastically. “Do you want a male or female dog?” Indra asked. “A girl!” Anya and Niylah said in unison. “What do you want, Lexa?” Indra asked. Lexa started to write in her notebook, which she still carried with her everywhere she went. 

_ I want a male dog cause they won’t go into heat. I want a dachshund. They are very intelligent and tough dogs. They may be little but they are very fast and I’m sure we can have lots of fun with a dachshund. We can also take him with us easily since he doesn’t need a big cage and all.  _

Indra agreed with Lexa and Niylah and Anya agreed with some points. “We’ll ask Gustus what he thinks after school,” Indra promised. 

Lexa didn’t like school that day. Everyone was asking why she was walking with crutches and there was always a little crowd around her, which made her nervous. Niylah tried to get everyone away from her sister but it didn’t help. At the end of the school day, the sisters were exhausted. 

At home, they asked Gustus if he liked a dachshund. He did but he wanted to look at more breeds before making their final decision. Eventually, they had four breeds to choose from. The dachshund, the terrier, the labrador and the jack russell. It wasn’t a surprise that they all choose for the dachshund. Since Lexa had mentioned the breed, everyone was looking up pictures and videos and they all adored the dachshunds. 

“So, we need to talk about taking care of a dog and all,” Indra said. “The dog needs to go for a walk a lot since it’s still a puppy.” They had all agreed to take a puppy so they could raise him and see him grow. “I’ve read you have to be very careful with dachshunds cause their long back is vulnerable. We have to teach him rules and he needs to listen to us.” Indra looked at the girls to see if they understood. 

The next hour they talked about raising a dog and what to do and not to do. Indra and Gustus asked them to make a list of rules for them and the dogs in the following week to see if they knew enough to live with a dog. 

Every afternoon, for seven days long, Niylah, Lexa and Anya sat in Niylah’s room, looking up information on the laptop and discussing which rules were important and which not. At the end of the week, they had two long lists. Proud, they showed it to Indra and Gustus, who were very impressed with their work. 

“I’ve found a breeder who has one male pup left. I can call her and make an appointment to visit,” Indra announced. Excited, everyone agreed to meet next Thursday. Indra allowed them to buy a polaroid camera from their own money. They bought enough cards to make fifty pictures. 

By Wednesday, Lexa wasn’t bothered by her crutches at all. All she could focus on was on the dog. She helped Anya and Niylah to make the whole ground floor safe for the dog. All the wires were covered and all sharp things were removed from the ground floor. They made a closet for their shoes and cleaned up everything. Anya asked if they had to clean up the first floor too but Lexa explained that dachshunds couldn’t walk stairs cause it’s too dangerous because of their long back. Fully prepared, they went to bed Wednesday evening.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope it was worth your time.   
> I'm a bit struggling with school so I don't know when the next chapter will be up. It won't take weeks, I promise.   
> If you have any feedback or suggestions, let me know. I can only change things that bother you if you tell me what's bothering you. 
> 
> 2197 words


	22. Mystery person

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They meet the puppies! Anya is texting a mysterious person and they go shopping.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry, the chapters aren't very interesting lately. Next chapter will be more interesting but not too much angst.  
> Enjoy reading

Thursday, they had the appointment with the breeder at 7 PM. After dinner, they stepped into the car, on their way to the breeder. On the way there, the girls were perfectioning their list with questions. “Don’t get too excited,” Indra warned them. “They want to meet us first to see if we’re a good family for the puppy. If she doesn’t think we’re suitable, we might not get the puppy.” Indra looked at their girls and noticed none of them were listening. Niylah and Lexa were looking at pictures of dachshund puppies. Indra looked at their oldest daughter and saw she was typing on her phone, smiling widely. Smiling, Indra turned back around.

When they arrived, they were greeted by two dachshunds, barking excited. A man told them they could come through the backyard. “Hi, my name is Carla,” the breeder introduced herself. “This is my husband, Josh.” Indra introduced herself and her family. They sat down at the table in the backyard. Lexa saw the puppies in the bench and walked over to them. Immediately, they all stumbled to her, clumsily tripping and getting up again. Lexa laughed and pushed her finger through the bars.

“If you want, you can sit down and have one of the puppies on your lap,” Carla offered Lexa. Smiling, Lexa sat down and Carla put a puppy in her lap. “This is Peter,” Carla told her. Lexa petter the pup, smiling widely. Carla offered Niylah and Anya a puppy too. Niylah had Pelle in her lap and Anya had Paige in hers. Indra and Gustus petted them and took lots of pictures.

“The females are all chosen by a family. Another family wants a male pup but they don’t know which one they want. If they choose Pelle, you’ll get Peter. If they choose Peter, you’ll get Pelle,” Carla explained. Lexa signed something but Carla didn’t understand sign language.

“Our mother told us you wanted to meet us first to see if we are suitable for a puppy,” Anya translated. “Since you told us we would get the other male puppy, Lexa’s wondering if that means you think we’re suitable for a pup.” “Yes, I think you are suitable,” Carla said. “It’s more of a formality and if I really have doubts, I won’t let the pup go home with you but I don’t. I don’t always think it’s good to take a dachshund puppy when you have children cause children are noisy and that makes the puppy noisy and playful but you’re all very calm,” the breeder explained.

After one and a half hour, it was time to leave. They made an appointment for the next week to visit the puppies again. “I’ll call you when I know which puppy the other family has chosen,” Carla promised them. Happy, the Forrest family stepped into the car.

On the way back, they talked about the puppies. Niylah, Anya, Indra and Gustus liked Peter the most cause he was really happy and not scared. Pelle was scared and quiet. The first fifteen minutes, he sat trembling in Niylah’s lap. *I love both of them,* Lexa said.

At home, Lexa sat on the couch with her leg resting on the table. Niylah was sitting next to her, not leaving her side. Anya was sitting on the couch too, texting on her phone. “Who are you talking to?” Gustus asked curiously. He had noticed his oldest daughter was smiling at her phone all day and was wondering who made her so happy. “No one,” Anya said while typing further. “And how do you know this no one?” He asked further. Irritated, Anya stood up and went upstairs.

When it was time for bed, Anya was still texting this mysterious person. Lexa lay in her bed, thinking about lots of things. She was happy for her sister that someone made her so happy but she was also scared her sister would spend less and less time with her, leaving her here while she would live her own life eventually.

“Anya?” she asked. Anya knew it was serious since her sister actually talked out loud. She put her phone away and sat on her sister’s bed. “What’s wrong Lex?” she asked. *Who are you texting?*  “Just a friend, Lex. Nothing to worry about.” *Please don’t leave me.* “I won’t ever leave you, sis. You’re my family and I love you.”

Anya understood why her sister was scared but honestly, for one time she wanted something for herself. She crawled in her sister’s bed, holding her in her arms while Lexa fell asleep. When her phone buzzed, she opened the text smiling. She quickly replied before putting her phone away and falling asleep too.

The next day, Anya was happily eating her breakfast. “What the hell is wrong with you?” Niylah asked. “What do you mean?” Anya asked confused. “You are smiling, it’s creepy.” “Why is that creepy. Can’t I be happy?” “No, you hardly ever smile. Do you have a boyfriend or something?” Irritated, Niylah grabbed her plate and walked to the living room, eating her breakfast alone. She didn’t see Anya’s shocked face when she asked her if she had a boyfriend.

 

Anya    
At school, she was greeted by Lucy. “Why do you look so happy?” Lucy asked when she saw her friend. “Arghhhh. Why is everyone asking me that?” Anya asked irritated. “Maybe cause you haven’t looked so happy for a long time? Maybe your family and friends are just happy to see you smiling,” Lucy shot back. “I’m sorry,” Anya apologised, ashamed of acting like this to her friend.

“Have you heard anything from Tris?” Lucy changed the subject. “I heard her mother is in the hospital again.” “Yeah she told me,” Anya replied. “She’s been in the hospital all weekend and probably won’t come to school today.” The first bell rang and they made their way over to the classroom.

During lunch, Diana wanted to sit with them but Artigas told her to leave them alone, saying a real friend wouldn’t hurt her best friend so much. Artigas and Quint came to Lucy after hearing Diana gossip about Tris with other people. Lucy told them what happened and they didn’t want to hang out with Diana anymore. They practically banned her from the group.

“Are you going to meet Tris today?” Lucy asked. “I want to but I’m not sure she wants it right now,” Anya replied. “Why don’t just ask?” “Cause I don’t want to pressure her. She’s going through a lot right now, I don’t want her to feel obligated to meet with us because we’re her friends.” Anya hoped Lucy would understand. “You’re right. We can just send her a text and tell her we’re here if she needs us. If she does want to meet we can do that and if she doesn’t want to then that’s fine too.” Anya nodded and started typing on her phone.

Anya was doing her homework at the kitchen table when she heard her phone buzzing. She wanted to grab her phone but Indra reached it first. “First your homework, you can talk with your mystery person when you’re finished,” she said with a chuckle. “But Indra, Tris might text me back. Her mother is in the hospital and she would text me if needed me.” Anya begged the older woman with her eyes to give her her phone back.

Sighing, Indra handed the phone back to Anya. “If Tris wants to come here, she’s welcome of course but please, try to finish some homework.” Anya nodded and checked who had texted her.

 **Quint:** Do you know what we have to do for biology?

Disappointed, Anya put her phone away and continued doing her homework. When Gustus came home, she had just finished her homework. They talked about their days and Gustus asked about her mystery person again. “Just stop! I’m not going to respond to this anymore!” Angry, Anya walked upstairs, to her bedroom.

Maybe it wasn’t fair to be so angry at anyone but Anya didn’t like it anymore. Everyone kept asking about it but she just wanted to keep it for herself. To be honest, she was insecure about it.

Lexa was doing her homework, listening to music at the same time. When she saw Anya kicking her pillow out of anger, she pulled out her earbuds and walked over to her sister. She laid a hand on her sister’s shoulder and looked at her questioningly. Frustrated, Anya sat down and patted the spot besides her. Lexa sat down and Anya started to explain.

“I’ve been texting with…. this person. I want to keep this person to myself. We have private conversations but everyone keeps asking. It doesn’t matter how many times I ask people to stop, no one does. I just don’t want to make things complicated.“

Lexa nodded and thought for a while before signing her response. *You should talk with Indra, Gustus and Niylah. If you explain it to them, they’ll understand. If you call a family meeting, they’ll understand it’s serious.*

“That might be a good idea. Thanks Lex.” Anya wrapped her arms around her sister. Their hug didn’t last long but Anya was happy with every second her sister trusted her enough to let her touch her.

After dinner, they all sat down on the couch, at the request of Anya. She explained to them that she didn’t want to talk about the mystery person anymore. “I just want to keep this for myself. I don’t want to make things complicated,” she explained. “We’re worried about you Anya. What if this mystery person turns out to be an old man who pretends to be your age? We want you to be safe, Anya.”

Anya didn’t know how to explain. How was she supposed to explain that she knew her mystery person? That they had met in person and that the person was her age?

“I won’t go meeting any people I don’t know, I promise. We’re just texting and it’s fun.” Anya hoped it would be some sort of reassurance. “If you plan on going anywhere, can you just let us know where you’ll be going?” Gustus asked. “Yes, I’ll let you know, I promise.”

They ended their conversation and all went separate ways. Anya continued texting, Niylah and Lexa looked up information about dogs on the internet, Indra went to work in her office and Gustus did the dishes.

The next day, Lexa and Niylah didn’t have a soccer game. Indra decided it was time to go shopping. Irritated, the three girls stepped into the car. “How come almost every girl likes shopping but our three daughters don’t?” Indra asked Gustus. Gustus shrugged. “At least it doesn’t cost that much money.”

In the first store, Niylah and Anya found some clothes and tried them on. Indra was eyeing Lexa carefully. Lexa was just standing in front of a clothing rack, staring at the prices but not trying anything on. “What’s wrong, Lexa?” Gustus asked her. “If there’s nothing you like, we can go to another shop.” *I don’t need new clothes,* Lexa replied. “You don’t have to worry about prices and all, Lexa. You can buy whatever you like,” Indra said. Lexa shrugged and walked further.

Indra and Gustus were waiting for Niylah while Anya was looking to other clothes. “Anya, do you know why Lexa isn’t trying any clothes on?” Indra asked her oldest daughter. “She doesn’t like shopping,” Anya said. Indra was waiting for Anya to elaborate but Anya walked further. “Why doesn’t she like shopping?” Indra asked when she had catched up with Anya.

Sighing, Anya started to explain. “First of all, she has male parts. She’s ashamed of it and when she has to buy new clothes, she’s afraid that someone will see it. Don’t ask me why, I don’t completely understand it either. She just feels uncomfortable. Second, she’s so thin most clothes don’t fit. She also doesn’t like it that you have to pay for it.”

“Is there anything I can do to make it easier for her?” Indra asked. “Try not to push her. She’ll only try something on when she feels comfortable, pushing her doesn’t help with that. Also, maybe she would feel more comfortable if you go shopping with her alone, without Gustus, Niylah and me.”

Indra and Gustus discussed it and decided that Gustus would take Niylah and Anya and they would meet each other for lunch that afternoon. A little uncomfortable, Lexa walked with Indra through the mall. “You can decide where you want to go,” Indra said. Hesitantly, Lexa looked around her. Honestly, she didn’t want to go shopping but Indra wanted it and she didn’t want to disappoint the older woman. She walked over to a clothing store for children.

Lexa picked a shirt and pants to try on. When Lexa wasn’t back from the dressing room after ten minutes, Indra decided to check on her. “Lex, is everything okay?” Indra asked, standing in front of the curtain. Lexa didn’t answer but Indra heard her crying. “We can do something else if you want,” Indra proposed. Five minutes later, Lexa came out of the dressing room, dressed in her own clothes. She hang the clothes from the store back and they headed outside.

Indra proposed to sit in a little restaurant. They ordered something to drink and a piece of cake. “Can you tell me what happened in the dressing room?” Indra asked carefully. Immediately, tears started to flow from Lexa’s eyes. “Hey, honey. It’s okay. I didn’t mean to make you cry. We don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to.” Indra held Lexa’s hand, trying to comfort her. She wanted to hold her daughter but she knew Lexa would only get more upset.

When Lexa had calmed down, she grabbed her notebook, which she still carried with her everywhere, and started to write.

_I don’t like my anatomy. When I watched into the mirror, I could see everything. It just makes me feel like I’m a freak. My own parents didn’t even want me anymore because of it._

“I can only imagine how you feel, Lexa. You’re our kid now, we want to make you feel safe. Is there anything I can do to make it better?” Indra asked. _I don’t want to go shopping. I’m not comfortable enough for that,_ Lexa wrote down. “Okay, then we’ll wait with that.”

Indra looked at her watch and saw it was almost lunch time. They met Gustus and the girls at a restaurant and ate lunch together. They spend some time in the animal shop before heading home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all the support. I love it to read your comments. If you want to send an email or something, my email adres is kesari.van.balen@gmail.com  
> Please tell me if you like or dislike something. If you have any fun ideas, let me know. If I can fit it in the story, I might use it. Of couse you'll get credits. 
> 
> 2450 words.


	23. Peace (part 1)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tris has problems. Lexa gets into a fight. Drama, lots of drama.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for any mistakes. I'm sick since yesterday so I'm not very active with writing. You'll see the next chapter hopefully soon. 
> 
> I'm REALLY sorry for the cliffhanger but I had 3000+ words and I wasn't finished so I decided to cut it into two chapters. Enjoy reading.

Sunday, they visited the puppy again. “The other family is visiting tomorrow. I think they’ll choose then which puppy they want. I’ll let you know which puppy you’ll get,” Carla promised. After spending nearly two hours with the puppy, they headed home. 

Monday, they all had to go back to school and work. It was Gus’ week to stay home in the mornings and bring the kids to school. Carla send them a text that the other family would come around noon so she would text them with the answer around dinner time. 

Gustus brought Niylah and Lexa to school first cause Anya’s classes started fifteen minutes later. After Gustus had dropped Anya off at school, he headed to his office. 

Anya  
When she walked into Mr Kane’s classroom, she was surprised to find Tris sitting next to Anya’s table. “Hi how are you?” Anya asked her friend when she sat down. “I’m okay I guess, but my mom isn’t. Her illness has got much worse.” Tris had a sad look on her face. “I’m sorry. If there’s anything I can do for you or your family, please let me know.” Anya hoped Tris would take up on her offer. 

During Biology, Tris got a phone call from her dad. When Tris came back into the class, Anya could see that her friend had cried. “What’s wrong?” Anya asked worried. “Something’s wrong with my mom. They want me to stay with my grandparents for a while,” Tris said crying. “I’m sorry, I hope she’s going to be okay. Do your grandparents live far away?” Anya asked. “They live really far away. It’s around two hours by car. I don’t know how to do that with school and visiting my parents.” Tris started to cry louder. Anya led her outside the classroom, followed by Lucy. Artigas and Quint wanted to follow too but were stopped by Mr Kane. 

“If you want you can stay with us,” Anya offered when Tris had calmed down. “Indra and Gustus won’t mind and that way, you can still visit your parents.” “I don’t know if my father is okay with that.” Tris wanted to say more but she was so upset and confused she just couldn’t get the words out. “How about we go to my place? Indra is probably home, I’m sure she can talk with your dad.” Tris nodded and grabbed her bag. 

Anya explained to Mr Kane what happened and he gave them permission to go home. Anya called Indra and the older woman promised to be there as soon as possible. Indra drove them home without asking questions. Anya had told her that something happened with Tris’ mother and that the girl needed a place to stay. Indra didn’t hesitate to give the girl a place in their house. 

They showed Tris the guest room and told her to get some rest. They would talk later. Right now, the girl needed to process everything. Downstairs, Anya told Indra what happened at school with more details and Indra went to her office to call Tris’ father. 

Fifteen minutes later, Indra came back. “He said it’s fine if Tris stays with us. I promised him we would take care of as long as needed.” Anya thanked the older woman and went upstairs to tell Tris. 

Tris was laying in the bed, staring at the ceiling. When Anya knocked on the door, she told her friend she could come in and sat up straight. “Indra talked to your father. You can stay with us as long as you want,” Anya told her friend. “Are you sure it’s okay to stay here? I don’t want to be a burden.” Tris looked very insecure. 

Anya laughed. She didn’t mean to offend her friend but she couldn’t help it. Tris looked at her confused. “I’ve said and thought those words for so long. I thought I was a burden for everyone. I only have recently learned that I’m not a burden. Indra and Gustus are the most amazing people I’ve met. You won’t ever be a burden to me or to them.” 

Tris smiled at her. “Thank you so much, Anya. I couldn’t have wished for a better friend than you are.” “You’re welcome. Let’s go downstairs. Lexa baked a cake yesterday, I’m sure there are still a few pieces left.” 

Tris slowly became more comfortable around Indra. She was a bit shy at first but after a while, she was talking and joking with Indra and Anya. They watched series on Netflix until Indra had to pick up Niylah and Lexa. 

Lexa and Niylah didn’t look surprised when they saw Tris sitting in the living room. Tris assumed Indra told them what happened, at least a part of it. “Hi,” she greeted her friend’s sisters. Niylah mumbled something back and Lexa signed ‘hi’ back. 

They watched another movie in silence. When the movie was finished, Indra went to cook dinner. *Do you want to see a picture of our puppy?*  Lexa asked. Tris knew some signs but this was too difficult for her. She looked at Anya for help. “She’s asking if you want to see a picture of our puppy,” Anya translates for her friend. Enthusiastically, Tris nodded and sat down beside Lexa. “We’ll probably know tonight which puppy we get,” Niylah said smiling. 

Gustus came home and walked over to the girls. Indra had called him earlier and told what happened with Tris. Of course he would be okay with her staying here. “Hi girls. How is everyone?” He asked. Niylah and Lexa told about school and Gustus listened carefully. Tris was amazed. They probably told him about school everyday and still he sat down and listened to every word. 

“How was your day?” he asked Tris and Anya. “It was okay I guess.” Anya didn’t explain further. “I’m sorry about your mother, Tris. I hope she’s well soon,” Gustus said to Tris. “Thank you,” Tris managed to get out while crying. She hadn’t thought about her mother for a few hours but everything came back now. Anya and Gustus comforted her until she was calm. 

After dinner, Tris called her father. He told her that her mother was doing better but she had to stay in the hospital for a while.

The Forrest family and Tris developed a new routine. While the morning routine stayed the same, they did other things in the afternoon. While Gustus picked Niylah and Lexa up from school, Indra drove Tris and Anya to the hospital. The first few times, Tris went to her mother’s room alone but after a while, she wanted Anya and Indra to come in too. Indra and Anya saw how hard everything was for Tris and they were always there for her. Eventually, her mom got a little better. She was allowed to go home in a week. Tris would stay with Anya and her family cause her father didn’t have enough time to look after her. Her mother needed much more help than before she had to go to the hospital. 

Friday morning, they all sat at the kitchen table, eating breakfast. The kids had to go to school but Indra and Gustus had taken some time off of work. Indra drove Niylah and Lexa to school while Gustus dropped Anya off. Tris only had two hours school, starting at 1 PM.

Tris catched up with some of her homework while Indra and Gustus were talking about the dog. Tris was really happy for the family but she was also a bit jealous. She’d love to have a dog but no one in her family would have time to walk with him. 

At 11.15 AM, the phone rang. Indra answered the phone. With a worried look on her face, she walked over to Gustus and Tris. “Something happened at school with Niylah and Lexa. They said we have to come right now, they’ll explain later.” “Can you stay here on your own?” Gustus asked Tris. Tris looked scared. She didn’t want to stay home alone but she understood she couldn’t come with them. 

“You can come with us if you want but please hurry,” Indra said. They rushed into the car. Gustus probably drove far over the speed limit but no one cared. They rushed into the school, where the headmaster was waiting for them. 

“Hello, my name is Mr Jones. Please follow me, I’ll bring you to your daughters,” the headmaster said. They followed him to his office and what they saw made them very angry. Lots of people were in the office, screaming. Indra knew that made her daughters uncomfortable, especially Lexa. 

Gustus screamed at them to shut up. They hunted all people away. Only the headmaster, a man and woman and a boy were standing in the office. Tris saw Lexa hiding under the table. She tapped Indra on the shoulder and pointed in the direction of Lexa. Immediately, Indra walked to the table and kneeled in front of her. Lexa flinched and tried to make herself as small as possible. Indra stood up and walked to the headmaster. “Where’s Niylah?” She asked half angry half panicked. 

They walked over to the office next to the headmaster’s and found Niylah there, crying. Gustus and Indra hugged their daughter until she stopped crying. “What happened, honey?” Indra asked. Trembling, Niylah started to explain, hoping her parents wouldn’t be angry with her. 

Niylah & Lexa (beginning of school day)  
Indra dropped Lexa and Niylah off at school. They walked into their classroom and sat down next to each other, as usual. “Good morning kids,” Mr Evans greeted them. “Today we have a new student. This is Amy. Please help her if needed and be nice to her.” Then he turned to Amy. “You can sit over there, next to Niylah.” Amy nodded and sat down on the chair he pointed at. “Hi, I’m Niyah. This is my sister Lexa,” Niylah said, pointing to Lexa. “Hi, I’m Amy,” the new girl said shyly. 

They had to make lots of exercises but Niylah was chatting with Amy. She tried to involve Lexa into the conversation too but Lexa didn’t want to.  _ She’s just nervous,  _ Niylah told herself. 

Amy spend the lunch break with them too. For the first time since Lexa joined her class, Niylah didn’t want to play soccer with her. Amy lived on a farm and had lots of animals. Niylah wanted to know everyone about it. 

At the end of the lunch, Amy finally dared to ask Niylah a question. “Why is your sister so weird?” Amy didn’t mean to be so mean. She even shocked herself with the question. Before she could apologise, she laid on the ground. Lexa stood above her, ready to kick Amy in the stomach. Niylah quickly wrapped her arms around her and pulled her away from Amy. This wasn’t a very smart move. Lexa hated it to be touched, especially when she was upset. 

Lexa broke free from her sister’s hold and tried to hit the younger girl. Mr Evans stopped her and took her to a private room. He tried to talk to her but she didn’t talk, sign or write. Eventually he took her back to the classroom. She had to sit in the back of the class, away from everyone else. Mr Evans continued with the lesson but the whole class had seen what happened. 

“Lexa! Lexa!” Malcolm whispered, trying to get her attention. She looked at him, waiting for him to start talking. “If you want I can help you pack your bags,” he said. Lexa wrote something in her notebook and showed it to him.  _ Why should I have to pack my bags?  _ The boy laughed before answering. “You attacked Niylah. Do you really think her parents will let you stay?”  _ I’m their child too.  _ The boy laughed again. “She’s their biological kid. They just took you in their home because they get money for it. They have to get the money to spoil Niylah in some way.” 

Lexa started to panic.  _ What if they really send me back?  _ Lexa thought.  _ What if they separate me and Anya? What if I’ve ruined Anya’s chance of the dream life she wanted.  _ Lexa started to cry. She was shaking violently. For the first time, Niylah didn’t come to comfort her. She left Lexa alone, talking with Amy and ignoring her sister.

Lexa felt like she was suffocating. Mr Evans took her to the headmaster’s office but she didn’t even notice that he touched her. The headmaster knew about Lexa’s problems and called Indra and Gustus. He already planned to call them because of the fight. 

Present time

“I’m really sorry,” Niylah cried. “I know I should’ve helped her but she just attacked Amy and I was just so angry.” Indra wrapped her arms around her youngest daughter and soothed her. When Niylah had calmed down, Indra pulled away from their hug. “I’m going to check on Lexa now, dad will stay with you,” she said. Niylah nodded and let go of her mother’s hand. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you don't hate me too much for this. Next chapter will be posted ASAP but I have to catch up with lots of homework and I'm still sick so yeah. 
> 
> 2183 words


	24. Peace (part 2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexa talks, like really talks, with Indra. Lots of drama.  
> 2017 - 09 - 18 : I changed a few things in the conversation between Indra and Lexa. There aren't any major changes but I thought it might be good to mention.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, before you start criticising me, please read this.
> 
> This chapter was really hard to write. This whole story is hard to write but especially this. Things I have experienced are hard to go through again and things I haven't been through are hard to imagine. I tried my very best to make this chapter as realistic as possible. I'm only human, I'm not perfect. I hope you can think about this when you give me a comment. 
> 
> Writing such an emotional conversation is really hard cause I have to describe how everyone feels and reacts. In my head, I can imagine it very well but writing it down was really hard for me. I've heard lots of conversations like this, very emotional things and stuff. Unfortunately, in my experience, the conversations didn't end as well as in the story. 
> 
> I hope you like this chapter. Enjoy reading.

When Indra walked into Mr Jones’ office, she was satisfied seeing no one was in the room except for Mr Evans, Tris and the headmaster himself. “Is Niylah okay?” Tris asked concerned. “Yes, Niylah will be fine. Can you call Anya and ask her if she can get out of class?” Tris nodded and walked away with her phone. 

“Lexa, honey. Are you okay?” Indra asked. Lexa looked at her with so much fear in her eyes. Indra’s heart broke seeing the girl like that. They had worked so hard to make this girl feel safe but Indra felt like she failed. She promised herself she would always protect Lexa and she failed. 

Lexa (a few moments prior)  
Everyone around her was just so noisy. They all tried to comfort her and talk to her, it just became too much. She started to scream, which scared most people away, and hid under the table. Curled up to a ball, she rocked herself back and forth. If she could just calm herself down, Indra and Gustus didn’t need to know what happened. She didn’t want to give them a reason to send her away. 

When she saw Indra, she just couldn’t hold back her tears anymore. She started to sob loudly but when Indra kneeled in front of her, she flinched. She didn’t want the older woman to comfort her. She would have to leave soon anyway. 

Indra left and Lexa was left alone again. Her thoughts were running so fast. Lexa didn’t want to leave but like Malcolm said, Niylah is their biological child. There was no reason to keep Lexa. 

Lexa knew she had to fight for Anya. Her sister had done everything for her and for so long, her sister protected her from everything. Anya sacrificed everything for her sister. It was time to return the favor. 

When Indra came back, Lexa had made up her mind. She knew what she had to do but she was scared as hell. When Indra asked her if she was okay, it took her a while to think of an answer.  _ Should she tell the woman the truth? How much she needed Indra right now? Or should she be strong and try to convince her to keep Anya? She knew she had to give everything for her sister.  _

Slowly, Lexa climbed from under the table. She made sure to keep some space between her and Indra and moved to the chair. She sat down and motioned for Indra to do the same. Mr Evans and the headmaster left the room to give them some privacy. 

Lexa swallowed before she started talking. “Y-you can’t s-send he-her away,” Lexa stuttered. Indra was very surprised. Lexa was talking, like actually talking. It made her proud but at the same time it scared her. She had no idea what Lexa meant so she shot the girl a confused look. Lexa took a deep breath before explaining further. 

“I know I screwed up, I’ll go back and won’t make things more difficult for you but you can’t send Anya away. She can’t help it that I’m her sister. She didn’t do anything wrong and she doesn’t deserve to be punished for something I did.”

Indra almost cried when she heard those words. She wanted to grab Lexa’s hand but Lexa pulled her hand away. “We’re not going to send you away, Lexa. I know you’re used to people sending you away when something happens but like I said, you’re family now, whether you like it or not. We won’t ever send you back.” 

“She’s your biological child. I understand it that you’d choose her first.” Lexa didn’t care to explain further and got up. In that moment, she just wanted to run. Run until she would fall down from exhaustion. Run until her brain stopped thinking. 

“We’re not sending you away, Lexa. You and Anya are safe with us. We love you just as much as Niylah. It doesn’t matter to us that she’s our biological child and you and Anya aren’t.” 

Indra didn’t know how to explain. She didn’t know how to reassure her daughter she could stay with them. She didn’t know how to make her daughter feel safe and wanted again. 

Lexa was confused. She wanted to believe Indra’s words so badly but the voice in her head told her to run. Run and never come back. She knew she would only be a burden to this family. She had been a burden to Anya for too long. She didn’t want to ruin this family with her problems. Lexa decided she should just run. 

Indra understood what she planned on doing and took a step in her direction. When Lexa backed away, Indra took another step. And another and another, until she reached Lexa. She wrapped her arms around Lexa and held her. 

Lexa started to panic. She didn’t want to be held. She didn’t want to be touched. Being touched means being hurt. She tried to escape but Indra held her firmly. Indra kept repeating the same words over and over. “You’re my kid and I love you. I don’t want to lose you.” 

After a while, Lexa stopped fighting. Instead, she started listening. When she had finally processed the words, she broke down. She cried like she hadn’t done in her life. She held onto Indra like it was her life. Indra just repeated the words and held her daughter. 

Anya  
When Tris had called her, Anya ran to Lexa’s school. It was about ten minutes walking, Anya was there in five. Tris was waiting for her outside of the building. They didn’t bother greeting each other or talking about what had happened. Tris led her to the headmaster’s office and gave the family some privacy. 

What Anya saw made her very angry and happy at the same time cause:

  1. Lexa was breaking down. She was really angry at the person who caused her to be so upset. Indra knew Lexa didn’t want to be touched, especially when she was upset and still, she didn’t let go of Lexa. 
  2. Lexa didn’t fight Indra which meant either she trusted Indra or she was physically hurt and couldn’t fight back. Since there weren’t any doctors, she assumed her sister wasn’t hurt. 



She watched them for a moment before heading into the room, interrupting their moment. Indra looked at Anya with a smile but the older daughter could see Indra had cried. Anya took Lexa from her arms and sat down on the chair, pulling her sister into her lap. Indra left the room, heading to Niylah and Gustus. She quickly told them what happened before hugging them tightly. 

When Lexa had calmed down, she looked into Anya’s eyes and started to talk. “I was hurt but I think I am okay now. I want to talk to Indra.” Anya nodded and stood up, pulling Lexa off her lap. “I’ll go get her for you,” Anya said before walking out of the room. 

A few minutes later, Indra came back. “Anya said you wanted to talk.” Lexa nodded and they sat down next to each other. Lexa held Indra’s hand, needing the comfort. Indra just waited patiently for Lexa to start talking. 

“I’ve been thrown away like trash my whole life,” Lexa started. “When things went wrong, my foster parents would just send me away and take another child. When I met Anya, I wanted nothing more than to be with her. She was the only one, except for Arizona, who had supported me and never let me down. I know I’ve been a burden to her. I know she had sacrificed a lot for me. I don’t want her to do that anymore. Whatever happens, I want her to have her dream family. Whether I’m part of that or not, I don’t care, she deserves it.” 

“We’re not sending you or Anya away, Lexa,” Indra said. “I know,” Lexa replied. “I’m not finished yet.” 

“I love this family. I love my sisters and Gustus and you. I’m happy Anya finally made friends. I’m happy with this life. I know I have a good life now but I also know that things won’t get easier for me now that I have a family. I just have more to lose.” Lexa looked at Indra to see if she was still listening before continuing her story. 

“I’ve always wanted a family. Parents who would love me and I always wanted a little sister and a dog. I’m grateful that I have everything I want. I have problems, they’re in my head mostly. I can’t deal with them. I don’t know how to.” 

Ashamed, Lexa let her head hang down. “I love you, Lexa. I don’t care how many problems you have, I’ll always love you. Gustus and I will help you with all your problems. They may not go away but maybe we can make things a little easier for you. We don’t care how hard everything will be, we just want to be your family, we just want you to be our daughter.” 

“You probably don’t know half of the problems I have,” Lexa said. “I’ve read your file to begin with. Lots of things that happened are in there and opinions from psychologist are in there too. I’ve been around you for a few months now and I feel like I know you. I truly believe we can be a family. I believe we can be Anya’s dream family, but only with you in it.” 

“I want to make this work. I want to be a family,” Lexa said. “Then we’ll help you with that,” Indra said. She bend over to hug her daughter and for once, Lexa let her. “Do you think you and Niylah will be okay?” Indra asked. “Yeah, I’ve been acting terrible, I know. I’ll apologise to her,” Lexa promised. 

“Why did you get angry, Lexa?” “I wasn’t angry.” Lexa waited a moment before continuing. “I was insecure. Niylah had found another friend, one who wasn’t as messed up as I am. I just thought she didn’t want to be friends with me anymore. Then she didn’t even want to play soccer with me and I felt rejected. When Amy asked why I was being so weird, I just lost it. I don’t mean to act weird, things just work different in my head. I get scared when people come close cause I’m used to people hurting me.” Lexa started to tremble again.

Indra pulled Lexa into her lap and rocked her back and forth. “I understand why you did it but you still have to apologise, to both Amy and Niylah.” “I will,” Lexa promised. “How about I go get them and I stay with you while you talk with them?” Indra proposed. Lexa nodded grateful and sat down on her own chair while Indra went to get the other girls. 

A few minutes later she came back with Niylah, Amy and Amy’s parents. Both girls looked like they had cried. Suddenly, Lexa was afraid to speak. Indra sat down beside her, waiting for Lexa to speak. When she didn’t, Indra decided to help a little. 

“Lexa told me she’s very sorry she attacked you,” Indra said to Amy. She paused a moment to think before continuing. “Lexa has been through a lot and it was really difficult for her. Things in her head just work different.” Indra looked at Lexa to see if the girl wanted to continue the story. 

Lexa told them what she told Indra. How she felt during the situation and why. She didn’t go into much detail, after all she didn’t really know these people. “I was just scared, I didn’t know what to do.” Ashamed, Lexa hung her head. 

“I didn’t mean to be so rude,” Amy said. “I’m really sorry Lexa.” Lexa nodded and stared at the floor. “I didn’t mean to upset you,” Niylah spoke then. “I just tried to protect you. I didn’t want you to attack Amy and I knew it would get you into trouble so I tried to stop you but obviously not in the best way possible.” Lexa accepter her sister’s apology and hugged her. 

“Lexa, I think it might be best if I inform Amy’s parents about some of the trouble you went through. I think it would help them understand, are you okay with that?” Indra asked. Lexa nodded. Indra didn’t know the details, it wouldn’t hurt to tell Amy’s parents. 

Amy, Niylah and Lexa joined Anya, Tris and Gustus in the other room. Gustus excused himself after he had made sure his kids were okay. “I want to tell you guys something,” Amy sat. They sat down in the corner of the room, against the wall.

“I’ve been transferred here in the middle of the school year for a reason,” Amy began. She took a deep breath and continued. “I was bullied at my old school. I didn’t have any friends and I was weak. The kids from my class knew that and used it against me. I was terrified to go to school and eventually, I told my parents what was going on. They helped me and after a few months of homeschooling and therapy, I was transferred here. I haven’t been through the thinks you went through but I do know how it’s like to be on your own. I just want to make friends. I want to be friends with you,” she said looking at Niylah and Lexa. 

After talking so much, Lexa decided she could just sign her response. *I’d love to be friends with you but I need time. I’m not very comfortable with people other than family around.* Anya translated for her and Amy understood. Tris shifted uncomfortable when she heard Lexa’s words. Lexa signed again and Anya translated it for her friend. “She said you’re her family too.” Tris almost started to cry. In the short amount of time she spend with this family, she had started to love and admire them more and more. 

“I want to be friends with you,” Niylah sadi. “But I do have one condition.” Amy looked at her questioningly. “You won’t say something stupid about my sister ever again.” “I promise I won’t do that. I didn’t mean to say it like that, I was just wondering why you didn’t talk.” Amy hoped this didn’t offend Lexa. 

Anya answered for her sister. “Like Indra said, Lexa has been through a lot. After all that happened, she just didn’t want to talk anymore. I don’t know if this will change anything but it’s okay if it doesn’t. Indra and Gustus respect that Lexa doesn’t want to talk and they even suggested she would learn sign language. It works really good and if she wants to talk, she does.” 

Their parents came back and decided to take their children home. Tris was waiting in the hall of the school. That afternoon, Anya, Tris, Lexa and Niylah played soccer in the garden. Indra and Gustus talked for awhile before joining their children. Everyone was laughing at how bad Indra was at playing soccer. 

Anya asked Lexa if it was okay if she would sleep in Tris’ room. Lexa didn’t mind. She felt safe enough with her family to sleep alone now. 

When she laid in her bed, Indra knocked on the door. “Hi sweety. Can I come in?” Lexa nodded and made space for the older woman. Indra sat next to her on the bed and started speaking. “You were very brave today, Lexi. You talking with me and with Amy’s parents. Gus and I are very proud of you.” Lexa smiled. Indra saw Lexa wanted to say something and waited patiently until Lexa had found the right words. 

“Today made me realise a lot,” Lexa said. Again, Indra was proud that Lexa was talking to her. “I’ve never felt happier in my life than today. I finally realised I have a family, one who won’t send me away when I do something wrong. I realised I can have friends, even though I’m so messed up.” Indra was crying again. Usually she wasn’t very sentimental but today’s events had such an impact on her. 

“I was wondering….” Lexa was too afraid to ask further. “You can ask everything Lexa. No one will make fun of you or get mad when you ask something,” Indra reassured her. “I was wondering if I ..um.. if I can call....” Lexa took a deep breath and went for it. “I was wondering if I can call you and Gustus mom and dad.” 

For a moment it was quiet. Anxious, Lexa was waiting for Indra’s response.  _ It is too much? Doesn’t she want to be my mother? Did I go too far?  _ Lexa’s insecurities took over. 

Indra broke the awkward moment by wrapping her arms around Lexa. “Of course you can call me mom. I’d love that,” she said crying. The happiness both women felt in that moment was indescribable. 

Gustus came upstairs and found them crying, laughing and hugging at the same time. Lexa repeated her question to him, much more confident and his reaction was pretty much the same as Indra’s. 

Indra and Gustus went downstairs, discussing the perfect way to celebrate. Lexa walked over to Tris’ room and told them the good news. Anya was so happy for her sister. After that, she walked over to Niylah’s room. Niylah hugged her and told her she loved her. Lexa crawled into Niylah’s bed. Cuddling, they fell asleep, exhausted from their day. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you've read the notes at the beginning of the chapter.  
> In the next chapters, there will be less angst I think. I have a few chapters before the time jump. After that, Lexa will go to high school and meets Clarke. Unfortunately, this story ends there. 
> 
> I'll write Clarke's story after this and AFTER that one, I'll write about them in high school. You'll have to wait for it but I hope it's worth it. 
> 
> Thank you so much for all the amazing comments. They really help me, not only with this story but also because I'm sturggling a bit in real life. The comments make me feel really happy and proud. Thank you all, you're amazing. 
> 
> If you want to talk, my email adress is kesari.van.balen@gmail.com  
> I'm thinking about creating a tumblr account but I don't know if I have enough time. 
> 
> 2935 words


	25. Family confessions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Surprises  
> If you want to see what Sep looks like, he's based on my own dog. This is his instagram account [Sep_de_teckel](https://www.instagram.com/sep_de_teckel/?hl=nl)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry, it's not a great chapter. I don't have much inspiration.  
> Please read the note at the end of the chapter, it's about the upcoming chapters.  
> Enjoy reading
> 
> If you want to see what Sep looks like, he's based on my own dog. This is his instagram account [Sep_de_teckel](https://www.instagram.com/sep_de_teckel/?hl=nl)

Saturday morning, Lexa woke up in Niylah’s bed. Niylah had her arms wrapped around her sister and hugged her tightly. When she felt that Lexa wanted to get up, she started to mumble something but Lexa couldn’t hear what she said. 

When Niylah had woken up completely, they walked downstairs together. They were greeted by Indra and Gustus, who tried to hide something behind their back, on the kitchen counter. “Mom, dad, what are you doing?” Niylah asked curiously. “Just go wake up Anya and Tris and meet us here in 10 minutes. You’ll see it then,” Gustus said. 

They did as told, which Anya didn’t like very much. Whining and scolding, she got out of bed. When she saw Lexa almost crying, she stopped scolding and wrapped her arms around her sister. “I’m sorry Lexi,” Anya apologised. 

Ten minutes later, the four girls came downstairs. When Tris saw her parents standing in the kitchen, she ran into their arms and cried. “I’ve missed you so much.” “We’ve missed you too sweetheart.” “What’s all this?” Niylah asked. “We want to celebrate our family,” Gustus explained. Happy, Niylah hugged her parents. 

After lots of hugs and kisses, Indra told them to put on their coats. They stepped into two cars. Indra drove one with Tris’ mother (Sylvia), Tris and Anya. Tris’ father (Ryder), Gustus, Lexa and Niylah drove in the other car. The children didn’t know where they were going but soon, Lexa started to recognise things around her. 

She tapped Niylah on her shoulder and started to sign. *We’re going to our puppy.* Niylah started to talk enthusiastically. Carla had told them the other family didn’t know which puppy they wanted yet so the Forrest family had to wait until they had decided. 

Anya and Tris were talking and didn't notice where they were going. “Have you noticed Anya isn’t texting mystery person anymore?” Niylah asked Lexa. *Tris,* Lexa signed back. “What do you mean?” Niylah didn’t understand. *Tris is Anya’s person,* Lexa explained. 

After thinking for a moment, it made sense to Niylah. She stopped texting her mystery person when Tris moved in with them. Of course she stopped texting then, her mystery person  _ lived _ with her. She didn’t have to text her cause they could talk all day. 

Gustus saw what Lexa signed too and was happy he wasn’t the only one who thought it. He didn’t tell them he thought it too, though. After all, Niylah and Lexa probably thought they were just friends. Gustus on the other hand, suspected that his oldest daughter was in love with Tris. He didn’t want to make the girls uncomfortable and Tris probably would want to tell it to her parents herself. 

They arrived at Carla and Josh’ house and stepped out of the car. They were greeted by Carla and Hind, the mother of the puppies. “Good morning everyone,” Carla greeted them. They all greeted her back and sat down at the table in the garden. 

Carla walked inside and came back with a bench and a puppy package. “We have a surprise for you,” Carla said to the four girls. “You are getting Peeter.” Happily, they cuddled the puppy. “Have you thought of a name?” Carla asked. “Yes, we want to call him Sep,” Anya answered. “That’s a beautiful name. I have more good news for you.” Carla waited a moment before speaking again. “Sep can go home with you today.” 

The four girls went crazy. They were jumping up and down from excitement. Hind held her head skewed and looked at the family, not understanding why they suddenly made so much noise. Josh walked into the garden with a bench and a few puppy supplies. 

Smiling, Gustus informed them about the rest of the day. They would go to one of the biggest pet stores in the country to buy all things they needed for Sep. After that, they had planned a picnic in a park, where they could walk with Sep. 

 

They said goodbye to the other two puppies and Hind. The third was already picked up by his new family. They had one problem. All four girls wanted Sep driving with them but they drove in separate cars. Sylvia suggested that Anya and Tris could have him on the way to the pet store and to the park and Lexa and Niylah could have him on the way back home. They all agreed and stepped into the car. 

The pet store was huge. Lexa had made a list with all the things they had to buy. She gave the list to Indra, who divided the tasks. “Gustus and Ryder, you can go get the food.” She gave them a note with what brand to buy. “Anya and Tris, you can buy candy and a bones for him.” “Lexa, Niylah, why don’t you guys come with me and Sylvia? We want to look at a harness and leash and other things like toys and stuff.” They followed Indra and Sylvia to the harnesses and leashes. Lexa carried Sep, who fell asleep in her arms. 

They bought him a green, army print harness with a black, leather leash. After that, they went to the toys. “We can’t buy too much for him, otherwise he won’t know what to play with anymore,” Indra warned. Niylah and Lexa nodded before searching down the racks, looking for the coolest toy. Eventually, they bought him a rope, balls and some toys to chew on. 

“Lexa, can you go find your sister and Tris?” Indra asked. “I think they are still with the candy.” Lexa nodded and went to find her sister. She walked around the corner of the candy racks and stopped abruptly. Shocked, she turned around and ran away. Eventually, Niylah found her somewhere in the corner of the store, crying and trembling. 

“What’s wrong, Lexi?” she asked concerned. Lexa didn’t answer and continued crying. Niylah called Indra for help. Indra wrapped her arms around Lexa and soother her. Niylah went to find Anya and told her what happened. Anya had no idea what she was talking about. Worried, she ran to Lexa. 

Indra and the others gave them some privacy. “Lex what happened?” Anya asked. She held her sister close, hoping it would help the girl a little. Lexa lifted her head up and started to talk. “Are you going to leave me?” “What do you mean? Why would I leave you?” Anya was confused. “I saw you with Tris. You were kissing her. Are you going to leave me know?” Lexa asked, afraid of the answer. “Lex, I’m in love with Tris but that doesn’t mean I don’t love you anymore. I won’t ever leave you, I promise.” Anya hugged Lexa tightly. Lexa was confused. She loved Tris but she was scared her sister would leave. A human can only handle so much before they walk away. 

“I love you, Ahn.” “I love you too, Lex.” They agreed not to tell the others what happened and joined the others and continued shopping for Sep. Sep was sleeping in Lexa’s arms again, he loved to snuggle into neck. Finally, they had everything they needed plus the things they didn’t need but bought anyway. They had spent nearly two hours in the pet store. 

They went to the park and ate lunch. Sep didn’t have much energy but the little pup loved to play with a soccer ball. Lexa gave him the little ball but he wanted the big one. The ball was like twice his size but he didn’t seem to care. They played soccer with him until he was tired. He fell asleep in the middle of the lawn. Chuckling, Indra picked him up and held him on her lap. 

They played soccer until Indra told them they would go back home. Sep drove with Lexa and Niylah on the way back. Niylah held him while Lexa took lots of pictures with Indra’s phone. “Gustus and I discussed some things with Sylvia and Ryder,” Indra said. “Tris would love to have a dog but as you know, they don’t have enough time to take care of one.” Niylah and Lexa nodded. “Sylvia and Ryder would love to take care of him when we can’t and Tris adores him so much.” “Great idea, mom,” Niylah said. “And they can come visit a lot, right?” “Of course they can, sweety.” 

The next few days, everything was about Sep. Indra walked with him around 7 AM. Then one of the girls had to walk with him before school. During school, either Gustus or Indra walked with him. After school, the person who wanted it walked with Sep. He wasn’t allowed to walk very far but he had to walk a lot since he didn’t understand he had to pee outside. 

Sep was the sweetest dog Lexa had ever met. He was always happy, wagging with his tail. Whenever someone went upstairs, he waited in front of the stairs until they came back. He loved cuddling and he looked so cute no one could deny him anything. However, everyone knew not to give him too much candy. Since Lexa had told them a story about teckels who couldn’t even walk anymore, everyone was very careful with giving him candy. 

The simplest things like going outside or going to the beach got much more fun with Sep. He always asked everyone for attention but he listened very good. He was stubborn, though. When he didn’t want to listen, he didn’t. 

Lexa loved every moment she spend with Sep. He loved listening to them playing piano and playing with the soccer ball. Lexa was so proud when he swam for the first time. Niylah had taken her bodyboard to the beach. They were playing in the water with a soccer ball and Sep wanted to play too. Before anyone noticed, he climbed on the bodyboard. Laughing, Lexa helped him in the water. When he had the ball, he swam back as fast as he could. He tried to dry himself by rolling in the sand but he only got mud in his fur. 

One morning, Anya send a text in the groupchat, asking if she could talk with the whole family that evening. Indra invited Tris’ family over for dinner and they all spend dinner together. 

When everything was cleaned up and the dishes were done, they sat down on the couch in the living room. “Tris and I want to talk with you about something,” Anya began. She said it in such a serious way that the parents got a little concerned. Stuttering, Anya tried to tell them something but no one understood what she was saying. 

“What Anya is trying to say,” Tris interrupted Anya’s stuttering, “is that we’re both gay and kinda attracted to each other.” Anya held her breath and looked like she was suffocating. Tris and Anya looked at their parents, trying to guess what they were thinking. “I knew it!” Niylah said proudly.  

Indra saw how much they were struggling and decided to put them out of their misery. “Thank you for telling us. I just want you to be happy. Whether that’s with a girl or a boy, I don’t care” Anya looked at Indra, waiting for her to say more but Indra didn’t say anything further. “This is a bit of a shock,” Ryder said. “Of course I’m accepting you as you are but it’s a shock.” The girls nodded, not knowing what to say. 

“I think we should set up a few rules but I don’t have a problem with it, of course,” Gustus said. “I don’t care who you love, I just want you to be happy,” Sylvia said. Relieved that her parents were okay with it, Anya and Tris walked over to them and hugged their parents. “I still love you,” Anya said to Lexa. Lexa just hugged her sister tighter. 

“We do have to talk about rules, though,” Ryder said. The parents and children agreed. “Please tell me we can still have sleepovers,” Tris begged. “Yes you can but in separate beds,” Ryder said. “No closed doors when you’re in the same room,” Gustus said laughing. “You can hang out with each other but not every minute of the day, you still have to think about school.” The parents came up with some more rules and Tris and Anya agreed with most of them. 

That night, Anya and Tris slept in the guest room. Normally they slept in the same bed but since they had new rules, Anya was sleeping on a mattress on the ground. Tris had argued with her, since they were in Anya’s house, Tris said it was unfair that Anya had to sleep on the ground while she slept in the comfortable bed. Eventually, Anya shut her up with a kiss, which helped. 

“I can’t sleep without you,” Tris said after moving around in her bed for the past thirty minutes. “You want me to lay with you?” Anya asked sofly. She knew Tris often had nightmares, Anya had them too. They comforted each other and were less scared when they slept together. “What about the rules?” Tris asked. “Fuck the rules,” Anya replied. “They won’t notice anyway.” 

Anya crawled in Tris’ bed and wrapped her arms around her girlfriend. Smiling, Tris snuggled into her Anya’s side and hid her face in the crook of her girlfriend's neck. Happy, they fell asleep. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks again for all the amazing support. I love to read comments and I always try to reply.  
> About next chapter(s):  
> There will only be one chapter before the timejump. It'll contain at least one flashback about how Anya and Tris confess their love for each other. It won't be very angsty or special but I hope you like it anyway. 
> 
> After the timejump, Lexa is going to high school. There will be a few chapters but I don't know how much. I hope I can go to the 30 chapters at least. After that, I'm going to write Clarke's story. I hope you want to read that too but if not, that's okay too of course. After Clarke's story, their story together will continue. 
> 
> I hope you still like the story. Any feedback? Let me know in the comments.  
> 2244 words
> 
> If you want to see what Sep looks like, he's based on my own dog. This is his instagram account [Sep_de_teckel](https://www.instagram.com/sep_de_teckel/?hl=nl)


	26. A light to call home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter before the time jump. It feels like the end of the story but it'll continue.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have to confess something and it might be a little embaressing but please consider this.  
> I've never been in a relationship. I've never had a crush and no one has ever confessed his/her love for me. Everything I wrote about Anya and Tris is based on my (bad) imagination and other stories.  
> The chapter was really hard to write cause I needed to give them a 'happy ending' and I had so much to tell. 
> 
> Enjoy reading.

In the months that followed, the Forrest family was very happy. Clea came to visit a few times, for fun and for inspections. Her first Christmas with the Forrest family, Lexa would never forget. 

She woke up late, next to Niylah. They got dressed and walked downstairs. The other family members, including Tris, Ryder and Silvia, were already in the kitchen. They ate breakfast and played games and watched movies all that. After a delicious dinner, cooked by Indra, Sylvia and Lexa, they sat down in the living room, next to the christmas tree. They had decided that they would pull straws and buy something for the person on it. Of course the parents had bought more presents for the children and the children had bought some presents for their parents too. Sep got lots of candy, a few new toys and a new pillow. 

They were chatting and laughing while watching a movie. Gustus got up and Lexa thought he was going to the bathroom so she didn’t really pay attention. Suddenly, they heard a bell ringing. No one had noticed that Sep was gone for a while, who came running towards them. In his mouth, he held a plastic folder. Smiling, Indra mentioned for Anya and Lexa to open it. 

They called Sep, who happily ran towards them. He let go of the plastic folder and cuddled them. They cuddled him back and grabbed the folder. Anya opened it and handed Lexa a stack of papers. It looked like documents, which turned out it was.

Screaming from enjoyment, Lexa and Anya jumped up. They embraced Indra and Gustus, saying ‘thank you’ over and over again. The others in the room, except for Tris, seemed to already know what they got and congratulated them. 

Smiling, Anya handed her girlfriend the documents. “You’re getting adopted!” Tris cheered loudly while hugging Anya. She knew it was what Anya and Lexa dreamed of since they were in the system. “I’m so happy for you!”

It was definitely the best christmas Lexa had ever had. Anya had finally let her walls completely down and started calling Indra and Gustus mom and dad too. The next day, Lexa didn’t want to open her eyes, afraid everything would be a dream and she would wake up in Thelonius’ home. When Anya tried to pull the covers off of her, she started to cry. She curled up to a ball and started trembling. Surprised, Anya let go. She decided to go get Indra. 

“Lexi, wake up honey. It’s time for breakfast,” Indra said softly. Hearing Indra’s voice made Lexa realise she wasn’t back there, with Thelonius. She sat straight up and wrapped her arms around Indra’s neck. Indra soother her daughter until she had calmed down. “You’re okay, Lex. You’re safe here, you’re with us.” 

Lexa took a few deep breaths and let go of Indra. “I’m sorry,” she said. “You don’t have to apologise for being upset, Lex. I’m your mother, I’m here for you.” Lexa smiled when she heard Indra calling herself her mother. “I was afraid when I woke up, everything would turn out to be a dream.” “It’s not a dream, we’re your family.” They went downstairs together. Gustus was cooking eggs and bacon. He greeted her cheerfully and Lexa gave him a hug. “I love you,” she said. Gustus got tears in his eyes and said it back. 

After the holidays, they all had to get back to school. Anya and Tris were waiting for Lucy and the boys by the lockers. They had told their friends about their relationship and they were happy for them. Anya often thought about the day she confessed her love to Tris.

_ Anya went home with Tris after school. Her parents went away for the weekend and Tris was allowed to stay home alone. “Want to watch a movie?” Tris asked. Anya nodded and sat down on the couch. Tris made popcorn while Anya picked a movie. “Do you want to watch Hachi?” Anya asked. “yeah sure.” Tris sat down next to Anya, putting the bowl popcorn between them.  _

_ Half way through the movie, Anya lost interest. She had watched the movie a hundred times with Lexa and already knew the whole story. Instead, she was watching Tris. She tried really hard not to but she just couldn’t keep her eyes of her friend. She knew it was wrong. She knew she would probably lose her friend if she’d tell her, which is why she didn’t.  _

_ At some point, Tris started to cry. Anya looked smiling at her friend. Lexa always started crying at the same point. Tris looked at her confused and a little ashamed. Anya told her about Lexa and Tris wasn’t embarrassed anymore. “It’s a really good movie but it’s sad too,” she said to Anya. “Yeah I know. I still love it though.”  _

_ Tris grabbed Anya’s hand and they continued watching the movie. When the movie was finished, Tris looked at their intertwined hands. Blushing, Anya let go and stared at the ground.  _

_ Tris couldn’t describe how adorable Anya looked in that moment. She wanted to wrap her arms around her friend and never let go. She never did anything like that because she didn’t want to ruin their friendship but after that afternoon, Tris wasn’t sure if Anya wanted to be just friends or more. She had noticed that Anya was staring at her through the whole movie. She was still thinking about her options when Anya broke the silence.  _

_ “I want to tell you something.” She said. Tris looked at her, a sign to continue speaking. “I ummmh have ehh am…..” Anya tried to form words but she didn’t know how to tell her friend. She wanted her to know but she was scared at the same time.  _

_ “I’m in love with you,” Tris interrupted her friend. She knew Anya might wasn’t going to say that but she couldn’t keep it a secret anymore.  _

_ For a few minutes, neither of them said anything. Anya wanted to say something but the words were stuck in her throat. Tris was waiting for her friend to say something, insecure about her reaction. She was scared that Anya would reject her but on the other hand, Anya would never abandon her friend.  _

_ “You are….with me?” Anya couldn’t believe it. “Yes”, Tris answered. Slowly, a smile appeared on Anya’s face, like the words were processed only now. Laughing, she hugged Tris. Tris was confused. Did this mean Anya liked her too? Or did it mean she thought it was a joke? She was laughing….. _

_ “I’ve been in love with you since the day we met, dumbass. You could’ve told me sooner,” Anya laughed. “Cause you were so confident you told me, right!” Tris fired back with a laugh. Slowly, they got closed to each other. Anya bend forward and gave Tris a soft kiss on her lips. Smiling, Tris kissed her back. It feels like magic, Anya thought. “Soft,” she whispered to Tris, who laughed at her (girl(?))friends behaviour. _

_ They spend the rest of the afternoon kissing and cuddling on the couch. When it was time for dinner, Tris asked Anya if she wanted to stay. Anya send Indra a text and got a reply two minutes later. She showed Tris the text.  _

**_Indra:_ ** _ Of course you can stay for dinner if Tris is okay with that. You’re allowed to stay over tonight but don’t forget the girls’ soccer game tomorrow. XX _

_ “You want to stay the night?” Tris asked. Anya hesitated. She wanted to spend more time with Tris but she also wanted to go home to Lexa. “It’s okay if you don’t want to,” Tris added quickly. “We don’t have to rush things, Anya. We can hang out tomorrow if you want.” Anya nodded happily but then realised her sisters had a soccer game.  _

_ “Do you want to come with me to Niylah and Lexa’s soccer game tomorrow?” Happily, Tris agreed. She would never say no to spending more time with her friend. They ordered pizza and chatted. Anya went home around 9, promising Tris they would pick her up for the soccer game the next day.  _

They all went to class and did their work as good as possible. After school, the friends went to Anya’s home. Quint and Artigas politely introduced themselves to Indra, not understanding why everyone around them was laughing. Indra gave them a firm look before speaking. “Don’t be so formal, just call me Indra. You’re allowed to be in this house as long as you don’t fight or upset my girls, understood?” Quint and Artigas nodded, scared of the older woman. 

They sat down in the backyard, watching Lexa and Niylah play soccer. After a while, they joined them. They were probably the only teenagers who liked to play soccer with two nine year olds but it was really fun. 

Lexa and Anya’s birthday came soon. They both got a big birthday cake and amazing presents. Anya invited her friends and did an escape room with her friends and sisters. Lexa invited Amy and Tris. They went climbing in the climbing park. 

Anya was really worried. Tris and her anniversary was approaching but she wasn’t happy with it. She loved Tris, really. Tris was her best friend and almost like a sister but that was the thing. She loved Tris but she wasn’t in love with her anymore. Or so she thought. She didn’t want to upset her friend. 

The first night they spend together, they had both admitted it was their first kiss. It felt so special. They opened up to each other and talked a lot. Their bond was special, they knew everything about each other. Anya had told her friend a lot about her biological parents and her foster homes and Tris had told her about the things with her mother. 

Anya was scared it wasn’t enough. She didn’t want to hurt her friend but she also didn’t want to lie. She loved Tris but they were just not ‘it’. 

They celebrated their three months anniversary at Anya’s home. They went out for dinner and exchanged presents. When they were laying in bed, Anya couldn’t stop thinking about them. She wanted to tell Tris but she didn’t know if it was the right time. 

“What are you thinking about?” Tris asked concerned. Anya was acting different lately and she hoped nothing was wrong. “About us,” Anya replied. She sat straight up and took a deep breath before talking. 

“I love you Tris, I hope you know that. I just….” Anya didn’t know how to continue. How was she going to tell her best friend she didn’t want to be her girlfriend anymore? “You want to break up with me?” Tris asked calmly. “Y-yes. It’s not that I don’t love you, believe me I do. It’s just that I think we’re not ‘it’ for each other. I see you more as my sister than as my future wife. I’m really sorry.” 

“It’s okay Anya. I know what you mean, I kinda feel the same. You were my first crush, my first kiss and my first girlfriend but I know we’re not made for each other. I don’t blame you for that.” 

A little relieved, Anya started speaking again. “I want to stay friends with you, Tris. I want to be your sister and I want you to be mine.” “I need time. We need time. But I think we can be sisters again, I want us to be sisters again.” 

They hugged each other but it felt awkward. Tris left and for weeks, they barely spoke to each other. When Indra asked her why Tris hardly ever visited, Anya started to cry. She told Indra everything, who tried to comfort her as much as possible. 

When Tris finally visited, Anya had lost the hope of being friends ever again. She didn’t blame Tris, though. She knew it was hard for her, it was hard for herself too. Anya was playing piano with Lexa when Tris entered the room. Anya didn’t notice someone entering the room and resumed playing. Tris was at a distance, watching her friend. She loved seeing them play together and it sounded amazing. Niylah coughed and Anya looked up, finally noticing Tris. 

“Uhh Hi…” she said awkwardly. “Hi,” Tris greeted her back. Niylah stood up and pulled Lexa with her out of the room to give the friends some privacy. “I’m sorry for not reaching out to you,” Tris apologised. “That’s okay. I know you needed time and I accept that,” Anya replied softly. She had missed her best friend and sister. 

“I missed you,” Anya said. “I missed you too.” “Maybe we can hang out with each other,” Tris proposed. “I’d like that. You want to stay for dinner?” After a few moments of hesitation, Tris nodded. They let Indra know Tris would be staying and headed to the garden, where Lexa and Niylah were playing soccer. They joined them and soon, they fell back into their old habits, playful irritating each other. 

Lexa had been scared she would never see Tris again when her sisters broke up with each other but Tris had reassured her that she wouldn’t leave her family. After lots of talking, they managed to convince Lexa that everything would be okay. 

Lexa was doing better at school. She didn’t fight anymore and Indra helped her controlling her anger. She had permission to get out of class when things got too much for her. Usually, Niylah went with her and they played soccer until Lexa had taken enough anger out on the ball. Lexa also started to talk more. No one ever asked why she stopped talking in the first place cause Anya had forbidden that. 

A few weeks before New Year’s eve, the kids were sitting at the kitchen table, doing their homework. Indra was helping Lexa writing an assignment about assistance dogs. Gustus was helping Anya with math and Niylah was writing an assignment too. 

Indra was amazed by Lexa’s progression. The girl still had trouble speaking but she tried. She spoke when she felt comfortable and slowly, the discomfort faded. She had almost perfect grades and helped Niylah a lot, who’s grades got higher since Lexa joined her class. 

Lexa’s relation with Gustus and Indra improved so much. She’s almost never scared to talk with them when she has a problem and they always help her. Lexa loved being a big sister. Niylah and her were basically the same age but Lexa was very protective of her. 

Sep being in their life was amazing. They spend hours on the beach or in the woods with him and he loved them. He got way too much attention and was a bit spoiled but he was the happiest dog ever. Once a month, the Forrest family drove to Arkadia with Sep and played with the kids all day. The kids loved Sep and Indra and Gustus helped in Arkadia when the kids were playing. 

Indra, Gustus, Niylah and Tris learned a lot about the foster system. Lexa and Anya slowly opened up to them about their time in the system. Anya even told about Thelonius and about ‘that night’, but no one knew what happened with Lexa, not even Anya. They respected her wish and didn’t ask. 

Indra did some work as a lawyer for foster kids who came to Arkadia, seeking for help. They decided they didn’t want to adopt any other children, since they basically already had four and they’d rather find them a family who could give him much more love and attention. In case of emergency, they were prepared to take kids in temporarily. 

Indra proposed to invite Tris and her family for New Year’s eve and the kids happily agreed. Anya couldn’t wait for New Year’s eve. She hoped it would be a new start for her and Tris, as sisters. 

The week before New Year’s eve, the Forrest family spend a weekend at Arkadia. They organised a talent evening. They made music and showed some tricks with Sep and lots of other kids prepared an act too. It was a moment of happiness. Lots of good foster parents were there too, looking proud at their children. 

New Year’s eve arrived and Indra and Gustus had cooked and bought lots of food. Tris’ family brought food too and they spend the whole evening and night watching fireworks, talking and laughing. The kids were lighting fireworks. Joey, a seven year old boy from the system lived with them temporarily and enjoyed his best New Year’s eve ever. 

When the countdown began, they all had different things on their mind.

Anya was thinking about her family and friends, Tris in particular. She really hoped they would be best friends again. She didn’t want to hurt Tris and she would support her, whatever she decided. 

Tris was thinking about Anya. They had hurt each other but unintentionally. She would forgive her and move on. They would be sisters again. The most important thing was that she wouldn’t lose her friend, she wouldn’t lose her sister and she wouldn’t lose her family. 

Lexa was thinking about her parents and sisters. She had gained so much last year. She always had dreamed of a family and finally, she had one. One that loved her the way she was. One that didn’t judge her or told her she was weird and no one would love her. They showed her so much love and she would always be grateful for them. 

Niylah was thinking about how special her new family members were. She missed Ninemae a lot but she was happy to have three new sisters. Ninemae would want her to be happy and that's what she was going to be. 

Indra and Gustus were admiring their children. They had accomplished so much last year. Maybe they couldn’t hang them on the fridge but they were so fucking proud of them. Ninemae’s dead had a major impact on their lives but they had to move on, for Niylah. And for Lexa and Anya. They were happy the girls finally had accepted them as their parents. 

Ryder and Sylvia were happy their family made it through another year of life. Their daughter was growing up fast but they were happy she had Anya. The Forrest family had done so much amazing things for them and they felt like they were a part of the family. 

10….9...8...7...6...5...4...3...2...1...0

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Lexa turned to Indra and Gustus and hugged them. “I love you, mom and dad.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the support. My friend and I posted something about comments and being polite but we were told it wasn't allowed. Sorry for that, we didn't know. I just saw another thing. I don't know if it's allowed or not but I hope it stays. It's not mine but I do agree with the created of the post.   
> <http://archiveofourown.org/works/12175545>
> 
> This is a much longer chapter, I hope you liked it  
> 3118 words


	27. High school

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TIME JUMP:  
> 5 years later, Lexa's first day of high school. Some people from her past show up again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you like this chapter. It's hard to write it and I don't have much time anymore.

TIME JUMP: 5 YEARS LATER (HIGH SCHOOL)

Lexa was woken up by the alarm clock. Sighing, she stood up and got dressed. She woke Niylah, who had thrown her alarm clock against the wall out of frustration, and walked downstairs. Lexa was enthusiastically greeted by Sep, who acted like he hadn’t seen her in months. Indra and Gustus were making breakfast for their girls. 

Today was an important and scary day for Lexa, it was her first day of high school. Luckily, Niylah started high school the same day so she wouldn’t be alone but unfortunately, they weren’t in the same classes. They only had three classes together, maths, English and P.E. 

They went to Tris and Anya’s old school, who had already promised they would help them finding the right classrooms since they didn’t have school. When they finally finished breakfast, they got in the car and drove to school. 

When they got to school, they had to go separate ways. Tris walked Niylah to her class while Anya walked with Lexa. Lexa’s mentor was Mr Kane, who was Anya’s mentor the year before. He was a nice man and knew about their problems at home. He tried to help Lexa as much as possible and Anya was really grateful for that. She was scared her sister would get bullied in class and she couldn’t be there to protect her. 

Anya was doing the police academy. She was almost finished and had yet to decide which way she wanted to go. Tris was working as a waitress in a restaurant. Her mother had died because of her disease and her father couldn’t take care of them anymore. Anya tried to help as much as possible but Tris refuses any help. 

Niylah  
Niylah was really scared. She enjoyed going to school with Lexa and she missed her sister.  _ What if I don’t make any friends? What if I’ll be on my own for the rest of the year…….  _ Niylah was thinking so much she didn’t notice that the girl sitting next to her was talking to her. “Uhh Hi, I’m Niylah,” she said. “Hi, I’m Yana,” the girl introduced herself. “Do you have any siblings?” “Yes, I have an older sister and a sister who’s the same age as I am. My sister’s best friend is kinda like my sister too. Do you have any?” “Yes I have an older brother, his name is Monty,” Yana told.

Yana spend the whole day with Niylah. They found out they had every class together. Niylah didn’t abandon her sister, though. She spend every break with her and whenever they had a class together, they sat next to each other. 

Lexa  
When everyone sat down, Mr Kane started the introduction. He told them what to expect in their first year of high school and as predicted, he told them to keep up with their homework and get good grades. 

Lexa sat alone, in front of the class. She kept her head down, trying to shut everyone out. She was scared and uncomfortable and she wanted to go home. Home was her safe place. There were no people who judged her and she had the most amazing family she could ever wish for. Tris didn’t visit that often anymore but the Forrest family visited the restaurant she worked at at least once a week. 

Mr Kane decided they would sit in a circle and introduce themselves. Lexa wasn’t really paying attention when suddenly, she heard a familiar name. “Hi, my name is Octavia Blake. I’m sixteen years old and I love soccer. I came here with my best friends Raven and Clarke.” Lexa had to do everything she could to keep herself from having a panic attack in front of the class. 

The girl next to Octavia introduced herself. “I’m Clarke, I’m fifteen years old and I love to draw and paint.” Her friend Raven told everyone she wanted to be a mechanic and many others introduced themselves too. It turns out that a part of the class already knew each other because they went to the same school before. 

Lexa decided to avoid them as much as possible. She knew Octavia probably wouldn’t remember Alexander and definitely wouldn’t make the connection between them but she still could be a bully. The others seemed okay but she didn’t trust them.  _ What if they’ll tell everything about me to Octavia? What if the bullying will start again.  _

Lexa was on her way to Maths class when she saw a familiar face. She stood still in the hallway, staring at him, shocked. It looked like he walked over to her but one of his friends stood behind Lexa, by the lockers.  _ Of course he doesn’t recognise me anymore.  _

Memories flooded through her head. She slid down the and sat against it, breathing heavily, trying to not get get a panic attack on her first school day. No one noticed the girl sitting against the wall. No one tried to help her. Slowly, everyone disappeared and Lexa was left alone. 

Half an hour later, Indra arrived at school. Mr Kane led her to his classroom, where Niylah was waiting for her. Indra saw Lexa sitting in the corner of the classroom, rocking herself back and forth. “What happened?” Indra asked worried. “I don’t know. Mr Kane found her in the hall, she was having a panic attack,” Niylah replied. “He brought her in here and went to get me.” 

“Thank you for helping,” Indra thanked the teacher. “No problem. I talked with the principal and she’s allowed to go home if she wants,” Mr Kane replied. Indra nodded and walked over to Lexa. 

Lexa lifted her head up and looked at Indra with pleading eyes. Indra sat down beside her and pulled Lexa into her lap. She started rocking them back and forth while whispering reassuring words into her daughter’s ear. 

When Lexa had calmed down, Indra took her home and Niylah returned to class. At home, Indra demanded that Lexa tried to get some rest. Lexa fell asleep on the couch, her head resting in Indra’s lap. When she woke up, she felt ready to talk. She trusted her mother and she felt safe enough to tell Indra. 

“Remember when you first met me and Anya, at the cemetery?” Lexa asked. Indra nodded and Lexa continued. “At that time, we lived with a foster family, the Jordans. Mrs Jordan was Anya’s teacher and she wanted to take care of us. Eventually, they send us away because they couldn’t deal with me.” 

Tears started to flow over her face. Indra wiped them away softly and kissed her temple. 

“They had a son. His name was Jasper. I really thought they would let us stay. Maybe we wouldn’t be a real family but at least we would be safe. She was a teacher, she was supposed to be able to deal with kids.” 

Lexa’s cries became louder and Indra pulled the girl in her lap. She soother her and rocked them, hoping it would calm her daughter down. She hated it to see Lexa like this, so broken and scared. Lexa didn’t deserve anything of what happened to her. Lexa turned in Indra’s lap and looked at her mother. 

“I saw Jasper at school today. He looked so happy and all the memories came back. I felt so helpless back then. I ruined another chance for Anya again and no one wanted me. They always send us back because of me.” 

“Honey, listen to me. What happened back then wasn’t your fault. I understand that it was hard for you and I wish I could take away the pain. You have us now and we won’t leave you. Jasper was just a child. He probably didn’t understand what happened.” 

“It’s just so overwhelming. I saw Octavia today too. And then Jasper and it just became too much.” Lexa sighed and let her head rest in Indra’s neck. “Who’s Octavia?” Indra asked. Lexa started to explain everything. She told Indra about how Octavia had bullied her when she was Alexander and how much it hurt her. How insecure she was until Anya finally had figured it out and helped her through it. 

They spend the rest of the day together. They took Sep for a walk through the woods and Lexa practised a few songs on the piano. When the others were home, they explained to them what happened. Anya didn’t say anything, she just hugged her sister tightly, hoping it would be enough to let her know she didn’t blame her. 

They’d had that conversation over and over. Lexa feeling guilty every time something went wrong and Anya trying to convince her otherwise. Lexa was just a kid, she shouldn’t be forced to bear all of that.  

The next day, Lexa went to school with Niylah. She didn’t come across Jasper and she was happy about that. She wasn’t mad at him but she also wasn’t ready to speak with him. She avoided Octavia’s friend group, which Jasper was a part of she found out later, and barely talked to anyone. Mr Kane often talked to her and tried to help her. She was happy with his support and he wasn’t pushing her to talk or to do something she didn’t feel comfortable with. 

In the weeks that followed, everything became a routine. Lexa went to school, came home, did her homework, played soccer, did the rest of her homework. She didn’t have any other panic attacks and Indra was happy she was doing better. Gustus knew his wife was worried about their daughter, he was too. 

Monday, they had a project for Biology and of course, Lexa was paired up with Clarke. She didn’t want to work with anyone from Octavia’s group but unfortunately, their teacher made the pairs. “So, when and where are we going to work on our project?” Clarke asked during the lesson. “Uhhm, I can meet up with you every day except for Thursday,” Lexa replied. “Why not on Thursday?” Clarke asked. “Soccer practise.” “Oh okay. We can meet after school today and tomorrow if you want. I can’t go on Wednesdays but the rest of the week is fine by me. You want to come over to my place?” “The library is fine. Do we meet in the weekend too?” Lexa hoped not cause then they couldn’t meet up at the library because it was closed in the weekends. 

They decided to work after school this week and see if they needed time in the weekend too. “See you after school in the library,” Clarke said before walking back to Octavia and Raven, who were laughing at her.  _ They must be laughing at me,  _ Lexa thought. The bell rang and they walked back to class. 

That afternoon, she went to the library after class. Clarke was already sitting at a table, waving to Lexa. “Hi,” Clarke greeted her. “Hi,” Lexa greeted her hesitantly back. She wasn’t sure if she could trust Clarke. After all she was friends with Octavia and they were laughing when she walked away from Lexa. 

“So, we have to make an information poster about the blood vessel system. Do you have any ideas?” Clarke asked. “Well, uhm, we could uhm….” Lexa was too nervous to say something. “I was thinking about drawing a blood vessel system,” Clarke said. “Yeah uhh that’s a good idea,” Lexa replied stuttering. She grabbed her notebook and started to write and draw something. 

When she was finished, she showed it to Clarke, who was very enthusiastic about her idea. “That’s a great idea. So, we pick an animal and make the front view. You can unfold the front view and then you can see the blood vessel system and organs.” Clarke was super enthusiastic and started to draw a few examples in her sketchbook. 

After an hour, they had made a planning about what to do when and they said goodbye. They would meet up the next day at Clarke’s place, since she had all the art supplies. Lexa was super nervous. She didn’t want to go to Clarke’s place but she didn’t have much of a choice, All the things they needed were already at Clarke’s place. She was thinking about asking Niylah to come with her but Niylah had to do the same project and probably didn’t have time. 

That night after dinner, Lexa decided to talk with Indra. “Mom, can we talk for a second?” “Of course honey, is everything okay?” Lexa explained to her that Clarke and Octavia were friends and that she’d promised to come to Clarke’s house the day after but that she was scared. 

“It’ll be okay, sweetie. You don’t know if Octavia has changed and maybe Clarke’s nothing like her friend. I understand you don’t want to do this but maybe you should try it. You’ve accomplished so much already since you live here, I’m sure you can do this. If it gets all too much you just tell her you don’t feel well and you come home or you can call me and I’ll pick you up. “

After considering her options for a while, Lexa finally made a decision. “I’ll go to Clarke’s place but if she’s going to treat me like Octavia did, I leave right away.” “That’s a good decision. Now, let’s go get a dessert.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so so much for all the support. It makes me really happy.  
> If you have any suggestions, problems, things I can improve or anything, let me know. You can leave a comment, send me an email (kesari.van.balen@gmail.com) or send a message on Tumblr, my name there is koeky112. I don't know how it works so please be patient with me.
> 
> 2235 words


	28. Clarke

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some Clexa interaction (not much). Sorry for the cliffhanger

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the cliffhanger.  
> Enjoy reading

The next afternoon, Lexa waited for Clarke by the bicycle storage. They cycled to Clarke’s house and went inside. Hesitantly, Lexa stood at the threshold of the living room. “You can come in,” Clarke said. Lexa was surprised Clarke didn’t say it with a mocking voice. 

They went to work on the project. Clarke was drawing a huge raccoon while Lexa was making a summary about the blood vessel system and funny facts. They didn’t talk much, only asking questions about the project. They were working for a few hours when Lexa noticed it was almost dinner time. “Do you want to stay for dinner?” Clarke asked. “My mom is working, she left money for pizza.” 

“I have to go home for dinner,” Lexa lied. Indra said she was allowed to stay there until 9 PM if that was okay with Clarke and her parents but Lexa didn’t want to stay. “Oh okay. I can’t meet up with you tomorrow but I’ll work further on the drawing,” Clarke said. Lexa was too shy to ask Clarke why she couldn’t meet up the next day so she said goodbye and left. 

At home, Indra and Lexa had dinner with the two of them. Gustus was working, Anya was spending time with Tris and Niylah was hanging out with Yana. “How did it go with Clarke?” Indra asked. “It was okay,” Lexa replied. “We didn’t talk much and the project is doing fine.” “Was she mean to you?” Indra asked. “No, she wasn’t.” Indra smiled, happy it wasn’t as bad as Lexa thought it would be. 

After dinner they took a walk with Sep. “How’s school going so far?” Indra asked her daughter. “It’s not as difficult as I had expected but the homework is quite a lot,”  Lexa answered. “Have you been talking to your classmates?” Indra asked hopefully. “Not that much, only when I have to. Lots of children from my class already have a friend group and don’t pay attention to me.” 

“Is Octavia’s group bothering you or other people?” Indra looked at her with a serious face, demanding Lexa would tell the truth. “If it gets too much, just let me know and I’ll talk with the principal.” “They’re not bothering me, mom,” Lexa replied. “Who are they?” 

“They are those popular kids who have rich parents and get everything they want without working for it. They’re always busy with getting a boyfriend or girlfriend and always want attention.”

“Still, you don’t really know them,” Indra said. “I know some of them weren’t nice to you but maybe they’ve changed. You don’t know what they’ve been through, maybe acting like this is a way to cope with their problems for them.” 

“Maybe you’re right. I’m not going to try to find out, though. I’ll find other friends, I just need some time,” Lexa said determined. “Okay honey. You can do whatever you feel comfortable with.”

That night, Lexa woke up with a panic attack. She had an horrible nightmare and it took Indra half an hour to calm her down. Lexa laid with her head on Indra’s chest, slowly breathing. Indra was rocking them back and forth while stroking Lexa’s hair. “Do you want to tell me what your nightmare was about?” Indra asked softly. “I-it was a-about Octavia…” stuttering, Lexa tried to explain what happened in her dream but she couldn’t get the words out. She started to tremble again and Indra decided to talk about it with her later. 

An hour later, Lexa looked like she was asleep. Indra tried to get up to go to her own bed but Lexa sat straight up and looked scared. “Mommy don’t leave. Why are you leaving?” She started to cry again. Indra walked back to the bed and held her daughter in her arms. “Shhh honey you’re okay,” Indra soothed her. 

She knew that Lexa sometimes needed to be little again. She didn’t have much of a childhood and Indra was determined to give her back as much as possible. Whenever Lexa was scared or upset, Indra would put her daughter in her lap and read stories to her. This time was no different. 

Gustus found them two hours later, still reading stories. He saw Lexa trying to fight back her sleep. He sat on the bed next to them and wrapped his arms around his wife and daughter. Lexa finally fell asleep and Indra decided to stay with her. Gustus went back to his bed and Indra laid down next to Lexa. With a smile on her face, Lexa snuggled into her mother’s side and fell asleep.

The day after, Lexa was allowed to stay at home. She hadn’t slept much and panic attacks, like the one she had last night, always exhausted her. Right now, she just wanted to do things that felt familiar. Indra stayed with her and she laid on the couch all day, taken care of by Indra. They watched Netflix and ate popcorn. Lexa knew she had to talk about her nightmare at some point but she just wanted to be with her mother. 

They watched the end of Pretty Little Liars, which was very disappointing, Lexa thought. They discussed the series for a while. Indra wanted to talk to Lexa about last night but she didn’t want to upset her daughter. She decided to talk to her tonight, when Gustus was home too. 

They were walking with Sep in the park when Lexa finally decided to talk with Indra. “I’m scared of Octavia,” she admitted shyly. “Why are you scared of her?” Indra asked calmly. “I’m scared that she’ll bully me again. I know she probably won’t find out about me being Alex but still. She made me feel so weak and insecure about myself. I feel like I finally have some control and I don’t want to lose it.” 

“Have you thought about talking to her? Maybe she has changed a lot. You don’t have to talk about the past. Just have a simple conversation, find out what kind of girl she is now.” It was silence for a while. Lexa was thinking about what her mother said and Indra was patiently waiting for Lexa to answer. 

“I don’t think I’m ready to talk to her.” “Then wait until you’re ready. You should do what makes you comfortable. Maybe you should think about it for a while and then we can talk with your father and figure out a solution together, is that okay?” Lexa nodded and they walked back in silence.   

When they came back, Clarke was sitting in front of their house, patiently waiting. When she saw Indra and Lexa, she jumps up, slightly nervous. “Hi Lexa,” she greets her. “I was just uhmm….” Clarke didn’t know what to say. 

“Hi, I’m Indra. I’m Lexa’s mother. You must be Clarke,” Indra helped the girl out. They shook hands and Indra invited Clarke inside. Lexa was a bit upset. She didn’t like to break her routine and she’d already done that by not going to school today. She just wanted to do her homework and play soccer, like she did every afternoon. 

“I thought you said you didn’t have time today,” Lexa said. “Yeah uhmm..” Clarke tried to come up with an excuse. “I had an appointment but I finished early. I wanted to see if you’re okay since you weren’t at school.” Lexa didn’t say anything back. “That’s nice of you,” Indra said. Clarke smiled at the older woman. 

“So, how’s it going with the project?” Indra asked, trying to make the situation less awkward. “It’s going quite well. Lexa had a great idea and we’re almost finished,” Clarke answered. Indra smiled at Clarke and looked at Lexa. She knew her daughter wasn’t going to talk if she didn’t have to. She had hoped that Lexa would connect a little with Clarke, maybe they could be friends, but Lexa didn’t want to. She decided to try one last time.

“Lexa, maybe you can show Clarke your room,” Indra proposed. Stuttering, Lexa agreed and took Clarke upstairs. Anya and Lexa had separate rooms now but sometimes they slept in each other’s rooms. 

“You have a nice room,” Clarke said. “Thanks.” Clarke was staring at the photos in Lexa’s room. She had lots of pictures of her family in her room. Tris and her parents were in some of them too. “Who’s that?” Clarke pointed at a girl in one of the pictures. “That’s Amy. We were friends in Elementary school,” Lexa replied. “Where’s she now?” Clarke asked. 

Lexa sighed.  _ Why does she want to know everything?  _ “She moved away a few months before we went to high school.” Before Clarke could ask anything else, Lexa took her back downstairs. 

“You have a lovely home,” Clarke complimented Indra. “Thank you.” Indra smiled at her. Lexa was looking at her mother with pleading eyes, hoping Indra would save her and find an excuse to get Clarke out of their house. Indra got the message but she did the exact opposite of helping Lexa. “Would you like to stay for dinner?” Indra asked Clarke. “If that’s not a problem for you, I’d love to.” Clarke smiled widely and Indra understood that Clarke wanted to spend more time with Lexa. 

Dinner went pretty well. Clarke met the rest of Lexa’s family and she enjoyed herself. Lexa was a little less uncomfortable when Anya, Tris and Niylah joined them. They talked about school a lot and Niylah even dared to ask some things about Octavia and the other friends. Clarke only said positive things about her friends, which was to be expected. 

Lexa was wondering if Octavia really had changed. She used to hang out with other bullies but Clarke definitely didn’t seem like a bully. She was very nice to everyone and she adored Sep, who was entertaining everyone. 

Gustus offered to drive Clarke home and Lexa went with them. When they stopped in front of Clarke’s house, they saw that everything was dark. “Are your parents home?” Gustus asked. “They’re working,” Clarke said. “But I’ll be fine. They’ll come home soon.”

“Are you sure you’re going to be okay, kiddo?” Gustus asked concerned. “We can wait here with you until they’re home if you want.” “It’s okay, Mr Forrest,” Clarke reassured him. “Thank you for tonight, I had a great time.” “You’re always welcome in our home.” Gustus smiled. “See you tomorrow, Lexa.” “See you tomorrow,” Lexa replied. 

In the days that followed, Clarke tried to talk with Lexa a lot. They discussed lots of things for the project, which made sense to Lexa, but Clarke wanted to meet with her for unnecessary things. Lexa felt uncomfortable but she wasn’t brave enough to tell Clarke. 

Eventually, Lexa talked with Indra. They also finished the ‘Octavia problem.’ Indra proposed to invite Clarke over for the project and ask her some questions about her friend. “She has trouble too, Lexi,” Gustus said. “Obviously, she’s used to her parents working late and not getting much attention. I don’t think she has the princess life, even though her parents are rich. Maybe you could tell her about Octavia bullying you. I think she will help you if you ask.” 

Lexa hesitated. She didn’t want to tell Clarke about the bullying but she also knew it’d probably help her. “I want to ask about her friends but I’ll only tell her about Alex if I feel comfortable. If I want it, I’ll ask her myself, Okay?” Indra and Gustus agreed and promised they would help her when necessary. 

Monday morning, Lexa asked Clarke to work on the project at her home the next day. Clarke happily agreed and promised to finish the raccoon before Tuesday. Lexa promised herself to try and talk with her classmates more often. She wanted to make friends, she didn’t want to hide anymore. 

If she’d just stayed home that they, none of this would’ve happened…..

Tuesday, Lexa had a good day. She had three of the five classes with Niylah and Clarke was really nice to her. Lexa walked with Niylah to the locker room and changed in the girls bathroom. They headed to the P.E. field and played soccer before class began. 

Their teacher decided they would play hockey and soccer today. Boys and girls were mixed and played against each other. Niylah and Lexa were in the same team and they were discussing techniques to defeat the other teams. 

They played hockey first. While Lexa had never played before, she was quite good at it. Their team won the first game with 5-3 and the second game ended 3-3. They were allowed to take a break and went back to the locker room. They ate and drank something before starting the soccer games. 

The boys from the other team soon noticed that Niylah and Lexa were really good. They put two man on each of them, hoping they wouldn’t be able to reach the ball. It happened in the last five minutes of the first soccer game. 

Niylah managed to get the ball and sprinted over the field, searching for Lexa. Her opponents were so distracted by Niylah that they didn’t notice that she ran in the open space. She had an open field and ran to the goal. 

Two defenders followed her but they couldn’t take the ball from her. One of the defenders threw himself in front of her and she fell over him. He tried to get up, kicking her in the process. 

Crying, Lexa laid on the ground while the defender was looking at her in disbelief. He looked at his teammates and started screaming over the whole field. “This chick has a dick!” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all the support. I noticed I forgot some (important) things in chapter 27 so I changed it. I had to write some parts for chapter 27 and this chapter and it was a lot of work so I only finished it today. I have my internship this week and school next week and it's a lot. 
> 
> I think you've read my author's note, if not, here's a summary:  
> I don't have much time to write but I'm NOT giving up on this fic. It might take some time before I update again but I'll update as soon as I can. I have lots of homework and long (school) days. I hope you can understand. 
> 
> Sorry for the cliffhanger, I'll continue writing the next chapter tomorrow.  
> 2289 words
> 
>  
> 
> **I don't know a title for this chapter. If you have some ideas, let me know  
> **  
>  Email: kesari.van.balen@gmail.com  
> Tumblr: koeky112  
> Or leave a comment.  
> 


	29. Unexpected

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The whole school knows about "Alex." Lexa runs away again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for taking so long to update. I've been incredibly busy with school. I barely have time to do anything other than go to school, do my homework, walk with the dog and go to bed. I hope you can understand. I think I won't have many chapters left for this part of the series. At least one, I don't know yet if that'll be the last one.
> 
> Enjoy reading

_Two defenders followed her but they couldn’t take the ball from her. One of the defenders threw himself in front of her and she fell over him. He tried to get up, kicking her in the process._

_Crying, Lexa laid on the ground. The defender was looking at her in disbelief. He looked at his teammates and started screaming over the whole field. “This chick has a dick!”_

~ ~ ~

Indra and Gustus rushed into the school building. Gustus thought back about the call he had received. “ _Mr Woods. I’m sorry to bother you but something has happened with your daughter. She’s gone…..”_

He’d called Indra right away and they came to their daughters’ school as fast as possible. Mr Kane was waiting for them and took them to an empty classroom. He quickly explained what happened at the soccer field. “Can we see her?” Indra asked.

“That might be a problem,” Mr Kane answered careful. “Lexa ran away, we can’t find her. She left all her stuff, including her phone, at school.” Indra and Gustus tried to think of where Lexa would go to. “We have to call Anya,” Indra said to Gustus. He nodded and walked away with his phone, already dialing his daughter’s number.

“And umh.. what about Niylah? Where is she, is she okay?” Indra asked Mr Kane. “She’s with the school nurse. She was really upset but she was fine when I left.” Indra nodded, trying to process what he was saying. “Thank you for your help. Again.” “You’re welcome.”

“Anya is on her way home and will be there as soon as possible. She told to check out the cemetery. Anya thinks Lexa went there…..” Gustus said while walking back into the classroom. Indra wanted to say something to Mr Kane but he interrupted her. “Go. Fast. I hope she’ll be okay. Call the school when you have time.” Indra nodded, thankful that he understood them, and she and Gustus left the classroom.

“I think it’s better if you go to Lexa and I go to Niylah,” Gustus said. “She might feel uncomfortable if I’m there, I want her to feel safe.” “Are you sure?” Indra asked. Gustus nodded and they went separate ways.

Gustus  
When he walked into the office of the school’s nurse, he saw his daughter sitting on a chair. Her eyes were red from crying and she was still trembling. He walked over to her and wrapped her in his arms. Niylah started to cry again but calmed down after a few minutes. “Have you found her already?” Niylah asked worried. “No. Your mom called Anya, who suggested we looked for her at the cemetery. Your mom is on her way there now and she’ll call when she has news,” Gustus replied. “How about we go home and wait for them there?” Niylah nodded and Gustus went to Mr Kane for permission to take his daughter home. When everything was settled, they went home.

Indra    
Indra hurried out of the car, rushing to the entrance of the cemetery. She ran to Ninemae’s grave, knowing that Arizona’s was close by. Her eyes darted over the cemetery but there was no trace of Lexa. It took her ten minutes to find Arizona’s grave. She looked for any signs that her daughter had been there but she couldn’t find any. Sad and worried, she went back to her car and called her husband. He told her to come home, which she did.

At home, Anya was calling with Tris while Niylah was sitting on the couch with Gustus. “Have you heard anything from her yet?” Indra asked hopefully. They all shook their heads. Disappointed, Indra sat down on the couch as well, thinking of places Lexa could’ve gone.

After being at home for half an hour, Indra and Gustus decided to drive around the neighbourhood, hoping they would find Lexa anywhere. Anya decided to stay home, in case Lexa got back, and Niylah went to find Lexa with her parents.

It was a little after 4 PM when they got a call from the police. _“Good afternoon. I’m looking for Mr or Mrs Forrest.”_ “I’m their daughter. They’re not here right now. Is this about my sister?” Anya asked. _“Yes. She was found on the streets, she was very upset. I’ll tell you the details later. She’s at the local police station right now. Is there anyone who can pick her up?”_ “Yes I’ll let my parents know. We’ll be there as soon as possible.”

Anya called Gustus and agreed to meet her parents at the police station. When she arrived, she saw her parents’ car already parked in front of the police station. She hurried inside, hoping her sister would be okay.

An officer led her to an office, where her family was. Lexa was sitting in Indra’s lap, holding her mother tightly, afraid that she would leave her. Gustus and Niylah sat next to them on a chair, looking worried at the two woman beside them. Relieved that her sister was found and seemed okay, Anya sat down on the nearest chair.

“The police wants to talk to Lexa before she’s allowed to go home. Indra demanded that they would wait until Lexa has calmed down,” Gustus explained to Anya. Anya nodded, unable to speak. They sat there until Lexa had finally calmed down.

A police officer came in and sat down behind a table. “We’d like to know what happened,” the officer stated. “It’s not normal for a girl to be alone on the streets in this state of mind. Her behaviour wasn’t normal.” Gustus started to explain that Lexa was a foster kid and that she was traumatized. “I’m sorry but I have to be sure she’s safe before I let her go home,” the officer said.

Anya lost it. “Like you were so concerned when we lived with Jaha. No one did anything to help us. The only reason that we got out of there is because our brother died. Someone had to _die_ before those stupid cops would do something. Now we finally have a good home with good people and you dare to insult them. Claiming that they abuse us. Maybe you should do something against the people who actually abuse people instead of OUR parents, who love us and protect us no matter what. But of course you are too weak to go after the people who deserve it!”

Anya stormed out of the police station, afraid that if she would stay longer, she would actually break some bones. In the office, the police officer was still staring at the empty chair. His boss walked in and asked what happened. Gustus explained it, since the officer wasn’t responding.

“It probably wasn’t the most respectful way of saying it but she does have a point,” the boss said. “I’d like to ask Lexa some questions, after that, she’s allowed to go.” Indra and Gustus stood up and left the room. “We’re right outside honey, just call if you need us,” Gustus said to Lexa.

Two minutes later, the police officer came out of the room. “She’s not talking,” he said. “Lexa has some speaking issues. When she’s uncomfortable, she won’t talk. She knows sign language and you can also give her pen and paper, that’ll work.”

When they were in the car, on their way home, Indra asked what the officer wanted to know. *He asked if you were hurting me,* she answered. *He also wanted to know why I was on the streets and not at home or at school.* Indra and Gustus decided it was better to talk at home with Lexa about what happened at school.

At home, Lexa went straight to her room. She knew that eventually she had to talk but right now, she couldn’t handle that. A few minutes later, Indra knocked on her door. Lexa didn’t answer, hoping her mother would leave. Instead of leaving, Indra opened the door and walked in. She sat down beside Lexa on the bed and wrapped her arms around her daughter.

“I know you don’t want to talk right now and you don’t have to,” she said. Lexa nodded and grabbed her laptop. She opened Netflix and started a new episode of a series they were watching. Halfway through the episode, Lexa started talking.

“I didn’t know what to do anymore,” she said softly. Indra looked at her, waiting for an explanation. “I wanted to run, so I did,” she continued. “Then I realised I didn’t want to keep running away every time something went wrong. I wanted my family.”

“You did good, Lexa,” Indra said. “I’m proud of you and we won’t ever stop loving you, you need to remember that.” Lexa nodded. “They found out…” she looked scared. “About Alex. The whole school probably knows by now.” “What happened?” Indra asked concerned.

“We were playing soccer during P.E. The boys couldn’t stand that Niylah and I were better than them. One of them tackled me and we both fell. He kicked me...down there. And then he screamed over the whole field that I….”

Lexa started to panic. Indra pulled her daughter in her lap and rocked her back and forth. She kept whispering reassuring words in Lexa’s ear until she had calmed down. “I don’t know what to do now.” Lexa looked helpless at her mother.

“It’s a difficult situation, Lex. We’ll figure it out. You don’t have to go to school tomorrow and we’ll talk to the principal, see what he can do.” Lexa nodded and curled herself up to a ball. Being rocked back and forth by Indra, she fell asleep.

The next day, an unexpected visitor came by. It was just before dinner when a car stopped in front of their house. Clarke stepped out of the car and the driver drove away. Indra opened the door for the girl. “Hi Clarke. Good to see you again,” she greeted the girl.

Inside, Lexa was almost having a panic attack. Of course Clarke knew what happened, the whole school did. Anya hugged her sister and reassured her that everything would be okay, her family was here for her.

After an awkward introduction, Lexa took Clarke to her room. Lexa sat on a chair while Clarke sat on the bed. “I heard you weren’t doing well,” Clarke said. “I wanted to see if there’s anything I can do.” Lexa shrugged. What was there to say? Lexa didn’t trust Clarke enough to talk with her about it.

“When will you be going back to school?” Clarke asked after a long silence. “Tomorrow,” Lexa answered. “My parents talked with the principal and there isn’t much we can do. I just have to deal with it.” “If someone’s bullying you, just tell me. Me and my friends will help you.”

Lexa couldn’t help but laugh. Clarke looked at her confused. “Never mind,” Lexa answered. After a while, they went back downstairs. Clarke left when Gustus had finished cooking dinner. No one asked questions about Clarke’s visit and Lexa was happy about that.

The next day, Lexa went back to school. She was scared as hell but she knew she had to do this. She did notice the looks she got and the people who were laughing at her but she acted like she didn’t. It was the worst during Geography. She sat next to Costia. Costia came in their class a week after the school year started. She was always nice to Lexa and Lexa wasn’t scared to talk to her. However, this time, Costia completely ignored her. Lexa tried really hard not to cry and remained silent for the rest of the class. She thought maybe she and Costia could be friends. She really wanted to try but now….

Lexa decided not to go to P.E. She sent Niylah a text that she wouldn’t come to class and looked for a quiet place to spend the next two hours. She founded a bench to sit on and started reading her book. She was so caught up in her book that she didn’t notice the three boys approaching her.

Suddenly she was pushed from the bench she had been sitting on. The boys were saying things to her but she didn’t process what happened. They started kicking. At some point, Lexa started to cry without noticing. The only thing she was thinking about was if it would ever stop. Would people ever stop hurting her because she existed?

Out of nowhere, three figures appeared. They started to pull the boys away from her. A fight started but the boys that attacked her were soon on the ground. They were taken away by some other people but Lexa didn’t notice who. Her whole body hurt and she couldn’t process what was going on around her. “Are you okay?” Someone asked her. Surprised, she looked up to the figure that had saved her. “Octavia…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all the support.  
> I'm sorry for any mistakes. Let me know if you find any, I"ll correct them asap.
> 
> 2160 words


	30. Friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The last chapter of this part of the series. Lexa, Clarke and Octavia talk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this is the last chapter of this part of the series. I didn't really plan that this would be the final but I just decided it was good enough. 
> 
> Enjoy reading.

_ Out of nowhere, three figures appeared. They started to pull the boys away from her. A fight started but the boys that attacked her were soon on the ground. They were taken away by some other people but Lexa didn’t notice who. Her whole body hurt and she couldn’t process what was going on around her. “Are you okay?” Someone asked her. Surprised, she looked up to the figure that had saved her. “Octavia…” _

~ ~ ~

She saw Clarke and some of her friends too. Lexa had never expected that Octavia would ever save her. Clarke kneeled in front of her and looked at her concerned. She tried to touch her face but Lexa flinched. She was very grateful that they had helped her but she still didn’t want to be touched. 

She stood up but she was in so much pain that her vision got blurry. Clarke grabbed her arms and pushed her down on the bench. “Just sit down for a minute. The school nurse will be here soon,” Clarke said. Lexa didn’t answer. It was only now that she noticed that she was trembling and bleeding. 

Lexa was brought to the school nurse’s office and Niylah hurried inside. She wrapped her arms around her sister and hugged her tightly. “I’m fine, Niy,” Lexa tried to reassure her. It didn’t really work. Anya and Tris arrived ten minutes later. “Mom and dad were still at work, they’ll come home right now,” Anya said. 

Anya and Tris took their sister home. Clarke and Octavia insisted to go with them and got permission from the principal. “A student told me what happened, my apologies,” the principal said. “We don’t know what happened,” Anya said, “but my parents will talk to you later.” 

When they arrived at their house, Indra and Gustus were already there. They looked really worried but as soon as they saw that Lexa could get out of the car herself, it faded a little bit. “Lex are you okay?” Gustus asked. Indra pushed her inside and demanded she would sit down and let her mother have a look at her injuries. “Mom, I’m fine! It’s just sore but it’ll heal,” Lexa said but it didn’t stop Indra. 

Clarke and Octavia sat down on the couch next to Lexa, slightly awkward. “So Clarke and uhm…..,” Gustus started. “Octavia,” the other girl answered for him. “Right, Octavia. What exactly happened at school…” Gustus gestured at Lexa. Octavia looked at Clarke, who got the hint and started to explain. 

“Lexa didn’t come to P.E and I- we were worried so we sneaked out of class and went looking for her. I know Lexa doesn’t like people so we searched in the more quiet parts of the school and we found her.” 

Clarke looked at Lexa, silently asking for permission to continue her story. Lexa nodded and Clarke explained further. 

“We saw her laying on the floor. Three boys were kicking and scolding at her. A few friends had come with us and together, we pulled them away from Lexa. We don’t know what happened with them, only that our friends took them to the principal’s office.” 

“Thank you so much for helping her,” Gustus thanked them. “You don’t have to thank us for that, Mr Forrest. It’s something that everyone would’ve done,” Octavia said. “You and I both know that lots of people would just watch or walk away,” Indra said. “I’m forever grateful that you didn’t.”

Lexa didn’t say anything. She was just staring at the ground. “From now on, we’ll make sure you’re safe at school,” Octavia said. She put her hand on Lexa’s arm and Lexa exploded. She started screaming and tried to get away from everyone, hitting Octavia in the process. 

Lexa ran upstairs, to her room. Clarke and Octavia looked shocked, the Forrest family looked worried. “What the hell was that for?” Octavia asked angry. “Sorry… it’s ehhhmmm…” Anya tried to find the right words. “She didn’t mean to hurt you. She’s just upset and she can’t handle people touching her when she’s upset.” 

“When I touched her, she surely didn’t act like that,” Clarke said. “I have a feeling that there’s more going on than she’s telling.” Indra sighed. She wondered what was the right thing to do. Tell Octavia the truth or let Lexa tell it herself. “I’m going to see if Lexa’s okay,” Indra said before going upstairs. 

Lexa was sitting in the bathroom, next to the sink. She was rocking herself back and forth, crying and trembling. Indra sat against the bath and took her Lexa in her lap. “You’re safe, Lexi. Everything will be fine. We’re here for you.” 

Indra was shocked when she saw blood running down Lexa’s arm. “Lex, are you hurt?” She asked concerned. Indra wanted to pull Lexa’s sleeve up but Lexa yanked her hand back. “Lex, talk to me please.” Lexa started to cry louder. “I-I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to...” 

Indra put her hand on Lexa’s sleeve again. This time, Lexa didn’t pull her hand away. Slowly, Indra pulled up the sleeve, until the scars were revealed. “Lexi…” Indra didn’t know what to say. There were some scars in Lexa’s arm, obviously self made. Indra felt like she failed Lexa. Her daughter shouldn’t feel like she had to do this.

When Lexa had calmed down, Indra lifted her up and let her sit down on the sink. She grabbed a first aid kit and started to clean the wounds. “I really tried not to,” Lexa said softly. “It’s okay sweetie. We’ll help you through this. You’ve been through a lot and we understand that this is very difficult for you. No one’s mad at you, no one’s blaming you.” 

“Are Clarke and Octavia still downstairs?” Lexa asked. “When I left, they were still there. Octavia asked why you panicked. I told her you were just upset but Clarke knows something’s up between you and Octavia. She wants to know the truth.” Lexa nodded. “I’d like to tell them myself.” Indra nodded and put a bandage around Lexa’s arm. 

Octavia and Clarke were still sitting in the living room when Lexa and Indra came downstairs. It was awkwardly quiet and everyone was just staring at the ground. She walked over to Octavia and sat next to her on the couch. 

“I’m really sorry for hurting you, Octavia.” Octavia nodded but remained silent. Lexa didn’t know how to continue. She couldn’t tell if Octavia was mad at her and it made her insecure. “Why did you get so upset?” Clarke asked. “I uhmm… It’s because of something that happened when I was little.” Octavia looked at her, waiting for an explanation. “Octavia, do you remember when you were in 1st grade?” Lexa asked. Octavia nodded, looking at her confused. Lexa took a deep breath and told them everything. 

“When I was born, my parents thought I was a boy. At that time, my name was Alexander. We were in the same class in 1st grade. You… you were my bully. We fought a few times but you never stopped. All the other kids were scared of you, which is why no one ever stood up for me. I was struggling with myself and you made it worse. When my parents found out I was a girl, they gave up on me. They faked my death and gave me to the doctor who diagnosed me. Anya and I met in a foster home two years later. We are biological sisters but officially, I’m dead.” 

It was silent for a long time, then Clarke started talking. “I don’t really understand. What were you diagnosed with? Where’s the doctor now, why don’t you live with her?” “The doctor, Arizona, was killed by her abusive husband. That’s why I ended up in the foster system. I was born intersex. I have two X chromosomes but I also have male parts.” 

Octavia was still speechless. She wanted to apologise. She wanted to explain why but she didn’t know where to start. She didn’t know if it would make a difference to Lexa. “I’m really sorry you had to go through all that. I know it doesn’t change anything but still… I’m here for you if you need me. I don’t care about your anatomy, I just want to be your friend.” Lexa smiled, like genuinely smiled, at Clarke. 

“I remember,” Octavia said. Lexa looked at her, waiting for her to say more. “I didn’t know it hurt you so much. I was just a kid…” “So was I,” Lexa said. “I hadn’t done anything to you but you still had to treat me like garbage.” 

“I had my own problems at home,” Octavia told. “I was never good at dealing with them. My parents didn’t love me. When I wasn’t needed, they put me in a small room under the floor. I had a couple of books and I had one toy. My parents loved my brother. He loved me and he always tried to help me. I’ve lived in foster care for a while but that didn’t work out. I met Clarke in 5th grade. I was at her house a lot and after a while, her parents decided to adopt me. I changed a lot since then. Raven joined our class in 6th grade and soon lived with us too. We’ve been inseparable ever since and I don’t bully anymore. I haven’t bullied anyone in a long time, I swear.” 

“I know everyone has a story. I know that you’ve changed, you’ve showed that today, but it’s still hard for me to just ignore my feelings and trust you,” Lexa admitted. “I understand that. I don’t want to make you upset. I just want to make it up to you and maybe one day, we can be friends. If not, that’s okay too. Just know that I’ll defend you against everyone.” Lexa smiled. “We can certainly try. I would like to be friends too. It may take me a while to adjust to the situation but I’m happy I can count on you, both of you.”

Lexa wouldn’t be going to school anytime soon but Clarke and Octavia asked if they could visit the next day and Lexa happily agreed. They asked if they could bring their friend with them, which was okay with Lexa. 

After a long, exhausting day, Lexa was happy to go to bed. She fell asleep soon. Indra was surprised to see that her daughter didn’t have a nightmare that night. After emotional days like this one, she often had a nightmare. Reassured that her daughter would be okay, Indra went to bed. 

The next day, Gustus stayed home while Indra brought Niylah to school and went to work. Anya had classes and Tris had to work but they promised to come over tonight. Gustus and Lexa had a late breakfast and walked with Sep. “Do you have anything that you wanted to do today?” Gustus asked his daughter. 

“I thought maybe you could help me with something.” Lexa hesitated.  _ Maybe he thinks it’s a stupid idea. Maybe it  _ is _ a stupid idea.  _ “What can I help you with?” Gustus asked curious. “I want to make some things for Sep. I want to do agility training with him.” “Like with obstacles and a seesaw?” Gustus asked. Lexa nodded. “Well, let’s go to the barn then.” 

They worked all morning and afternoon at the attributes. When they were done, Lexa tried to get Sep on the seesaw but he didn’t want to. That changed when Lexa offered him candy. Happily, he walked over the seesaw. 

Lexa was so caught up in training with Sep that she hadn’t noticed that Clarke, Octavia and their friend had already arrived. They were standing in the garden, watching Lexa working with Sep. Indra was already back too. Gustus called her and pointed in the direction of his wife and the three girls. 

Lexa walked over to them, followed by Sep. “Hi,” Clarke said. “Lexa, this is our friend Raven. Raven, this is Lexa.” Raven and Lexa had a few classes together but they had never talked to each other so they didn’t know anything about the other.

They went inside and Indra made them something to drink and a snack while Gustus went to his office to get some work done. Lexa, Clarke, Octavia and Raven were chatting in the living room. Lexa was surprised that she felt so at ease with these girls. They were very nice and understanding. 

Lexa really liked Raven. Lexa could tell that Raven had been through a lot but she didn’t let it hold her down. She was joking about her brace and when Lexa asked why she had it, Raven told the story with a smile. Her mother’s boyfriend was abusive and one night, he came after her with a gun. He shot her in the back and the  doctor said she would never walk again. Raven didn’t give up and eventually, she could walk again. Lexa really admired her strength.

Octavia asked her when she would come back to school. Lexa didn’t know the answer. She really didn’t want to go back but she also knew that she couldn’t change schools and eventually she had to go back. “I want to try tomorrow,” she said confident. It was the first time in many years that she had real friends. Amy was there of course, but Amy liked Niylah more and when she moved away, she didn’t even say goodbye to Lexa. 

“Are you sure about this?” Indra asked. Lexa nodded. “Sooner or later, I have to do this anyway.” “We’ll be there for you,” Clarke said. “You have almost every class with one of us and the ones you don’t, you have with Niylah, right?” Octavia asked. Lexa nodded. “So we can walk you to your next class and you can hang out with us during break if you want.” Lexa hesitated. She would love to hang out with them but she didn’t like crowds. They made her really nervous and she’d rather find a more quiet place. 

Clarke understood why Lexa hesitated and helped her. “We can search for a more quiet place during break,” she offered. Raven and Octavia nodded. “We’ll keep you safe,” Raven promised. “And if someone’s bullying you, I’ll send my robot army after them.” Lexa laughed. “Okay, I think that could work,” Lexa said. 

When Clarke, Octavia and Raven left, Indra and Gustus thanked them for looking out for their daughter. “You’re always welcome here. We hope to see you soon,” Gustus said. During dinner, Lexa told Tris and Anya about going back to school. They thought she was very brave and Anya made her sister promise that she would call when necessary. 

That night, Lexa fell asleep soon. It was the first time that she was actually excited to go to school. She knew it would be hard but this time she had friends with her, who would protect her and Lexa really hoped that this time, her friends would stay. She wasn’t over the whole bullying thing with Octavia but she wanted to try this again. She wanted to have friends and hang out with them. 

In this moment, Lexa felt so lucky. She had two parents who she loved very much and they loved her too. She had three amazing sisters and a dog, who was the sweetest dog on earth. She had a family who accepted her and were always there for her. And now she had friends. In that moment, she felt like she was the luckiest girl in the universe. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all the support. I was so happy with all the comments I got on the last chapter.  
> I will start writing Clarke's story as soon as possible and I'll post it when I have a few chapters.  
> I hope you liked this story. I know it isn't the most realistic but it's fan fiction :-)
> 
> It was hard to write an end for this chapter, I hope it's still an okay chapter.  
> 2609 words


	31. Author's Note

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, this is not a chapter.

Hi everyone,

As you probably know, this work was supposed to be a part of a series. Unfortunately, I haven't been able to write much the past months. I have lots of problems at home and I have too much work for school. I know I promised I wouldn't give up on this story and I'm sorry but I have to break that promise. I don't have inspiration and looking back, I really don't like this storyline. 

If you want, I can share my story plan for the other two parts of the series. If anyone wants to write this story further for me, maybe we can work something out? I can share my ideas and maybe I can help when you sturggle? 

Let me know in the comments if you would like to hear my ideas or if you want to write it further for me. If you want to contact me privately, my email adress is kesari.van.balen@gmail.com

I'm very sorry but it's not fair to say I'll continue this while I already know I won't be able to do that. I'm going to try and write a story in the holidays but I'll only post it when I'm sure I can finish it or if I have finished it during the holidays. I hope the storyline will be better then. 

I wish you all a Merry Christmas and a happy new year. 

Love, Koeky112


	32. Story Plans

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I don't know if you want to read it but this was everything I had planned out for the other parts of the story.
> 
> *Some edits were made at the end of the note.*

Hi everyone,  
Here are the story plans. If you don't want to know what would have happened if I had continued this story, I suggest you don't read further. This is not in the right order, it are just some random ideas. Some of these ideas might be used in my next story (if I'll ever finish that, I'll post it).  

The 2nd part of the story would have been about Clarke. It begins on the day she was born and ends at the same point where Lexa's story ended. There are more time jumps in Clarke's story but it's still interesting (I think).

Abby will play a big part in both Clarke and Lexa's life. She was best friends with Arizona and helped her with the whole drama around Lexa's illegal adoption. Abby was also the surgeon who operated on Arizona, even though she wasn't allowed to. When Clarke brings Lexa home to meet Abby, they recognise each other and talk about what happened with Arizona.

I planned some flashbacks about the time that Octavia and Raven moved in with Jake, Abby and Clarke and about their family situations before that. 

At first I wanted some drama between Clarke and Finn but I figured that would be too much so I dropped that idea.

Eventually, Lexa would tell Clarke about "that night". Thelonius raped her, which is why she stopped talking. 

I also wanted Lexa to write songs for Clarke and all the love drama. Of course they have their ups and downs but NO CHEATING and they always make it up to each other. 

Lexa had lots of problems with her own body becasue of what happened 'that night' and because she was bullied and abandonned because of her anatomy. Eventually, Clarke will help her get over it. 

I think this was everything I had planned so far. There were some other things but I dropped those ideas so I won't post them here. If you have any questions, let me know. 

In my new fic, some of these ideas will be used as well. Lots of people will appear in the other fic too so I hope it won't be boring or annoying. 

Merry Chrismas and a Happy new year to you all!


	33. New Story

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm writing a new story!

Hi everyone,

It has been a long time since I (kinda) abandoned this story. I'm very happy to tell you that I'm writing a new Clexa fan fic. I have summer holidays now so I'm going to try and finish it before school starts again. When I have lots of chapters, I'll start posting it here. I'm looking for a beta reader for my new story. If you want to help me out, you can send a mail to kesari.van.balen@gmail.com

Thanks for reading this!


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